onionbagblog

False information in election leaflets is an issue that is not only making headlines nationally. Here in Lambeth and the local Labour party is publishing literature in Herne Hill that is quite frankly, a pack of lies.

With two sitting @LambethLabour Councillors, and one Green party Councillor, SE24 has become something of a political battleground as the borough decides who will govern at Lambeth Town Hall.

@LambethLabour needs this lone Green seat to counteract the @LambethLibDems surge. The Greens meanwhile have recognised that their share of just under 37% of the vote in 2006, suggests that the electorate in Herne Hill is sympathetic to the Green message.

Ah yes - about that 36.7% share of the vote that the Greens managed to achieve back at the last local election. If you are in possession of an election leaflet put out by the much hyped #labourdoorstep team in Herne Hill, you could be forgiven for thinking that the Green’s fine performance four years ago was simply a political mirage.

Even keen to re-write political history, @LambethLabour has produced a highly misleading graph. Nu Labour feature (45%), as do the LibDems (40%) and even the Tories (15%) - the Greens are nowhere to be seen in the vision for Herne Hill, as fantasised by @LambethLabour.

Which is all a bit strange, seeing as though the @LambethLabour leaflet headlines states: “Two Horse Race in Herne Hill,” with the overt suggestion that a vote for the Greens is a meaningless vote.

Green Councillor Thackray was elected with more votes in 2006 than any of the @LambethLabour candidates. A whopping great big political lie is currently dropping through the letterboxes in Herne Hill.

I emailed Councillor Dickson, one of the current @LambethLabour Cllr’s for the ward, as well as the current Cabinet Member for Finance and Resources. With such a prestigious (and well paid) position, one would hope that the good Councillor has a fine head for figures:

“I am researching and writing a news story on the Labour election leaflets in Herne Hill. The Greens are taking issue with the claim that Labour has 45% of the vote, the Conservatives 40% and the LibDems 15%.

Please can you confirm where the figures came from, and why the Green vote of 36.7% at the last local election doesn’t appear in the leaflet.”

I appreciate that is must be a busy time for any local Councillor seeking re-election (especially so with the pesky Green vote of 36.7% giving you a bit of a headache…) - but no response from Councillor Dickson as yet.

Ever keen to find the missing 36.7% of the Green vote in Herne Hill, I turned instead to the political party that appears to have been whitewashed out of Lambeth politics.

John Hare is one of the Green candidates for the Herne Hill ward. He very kindly agreed to give me his take on the misleading @LambethLabour leaflet, as well as look ahead, with hopefully a positive agenda for the borough.

As John admits in the audioboo below, the fabrication of the figures by @LambethLabour leaves his party in a tricky position when trying to convert the good people of Herne Hill to the Green cause.

To make an issue of the @LambethLabour lies is to possibly appear as mudslinging. It’s a difficult dilemma, and one that has wholly been created by the Nu Labour party in the borough, with the aim of making political capital out of the propaganda being published.

John was able to offer a response given from Councillor Dickson regarding the data that has appeared out of nowhere. @LambethLabour has told the Greens that the graph is:

“…an illustration of our view of the respective strengths of the three main national parties in this area.”

Which is Nu Labour speak for saying we simply made the figures up.

I was horrified to hear this. It is not illegal to tell lies in election literature. If @LambethLabour has admitted that false information has been published in the leaflets, what else is open to scrutiny?

The public consultation regarding the mutualisation of local government? The allegation that @LambethLibDems want to legalise kerb crawling? Free swimming for every resident?

John didn’t want to become embroiled in the whole seedy matter of @LambethLabour mudslinging, but to remain silent would be a betrayal of the electorate in Herne Hill. Vote Green, get Tories, appears to be the rally cry from @LambethLabour.

Um, not so

If the election results from 2006 are any indicator, vote Green, get rid of the Councillor who admits that the figures in a political leaflet have been made up, would seem more likely.

Meanwhile I rather enjoyed my afternoon of tea and political chat with John Hare. The Green candidate was keen to put over the policies of his party, something that has been missing from @LambethLabour in Herne Hill.

John is a realist, not a liar. He recognises that the Greens won’t hold political power in Lambeth come May 7th, but he is hopeful of building upon the first Green seat won back in 2006.

With both Herne Hill and Brixton Hill being central to the Green campaign, John confirmed that if elected, the Green Councillors in Lambeth would refuse to enter into coalition with any political party. Voting and support (or lack of it) would be positioned in line with local Green policy.

I recognised John’s observation that Nu Labour in Lambeth is now nothing but an election fighting machine. I supported his observation that the role of the Greens in Lambeth is to be the conscience of @LambethLabour (even if I got my words a little tongue twisted at the end.)

So yeah, lies, damn lies and @LambethLabour lies. And we didn’t even get round to talking about Lambeth Life…

Good Friday wasn’t so great down in SE24. The traditional Herne Hill velodrome Bank Holiday meet was something of a wash out.

Again.

It’s such a shame that the UK track season opener is always subject to the weather. There has been a (scheduled) Good Friday meet at Herne Hill for over one hundred years now. The time slot is traditional - to shift it forward a few months just wouldn’t feel right.

It was a sorry sight though, when with the prelims completed on schedule, and then suddenly the South London skies burst open just ahead of the main race roll outs.

The cycling crowd knew what was coming. This perhaps explains the low turnout ahead of the main races.

Herne Hill is an outdoor track, something that we need to celebrate. Racing with the wind in your hair is an SE24 rites of passage. So is the call to clear the track, as soon as the first drops of rain start to fall.

No worries. There was the usual eccentric mix of bicycling entertainment happening elsewhere. The bonkers bicycle jumble sale was in full flow, and the very fine folk from Rollapaluza were doing their roller races under cover.

We sheltered in the beer tent for an early liquid lunch, looked around at the bruising skies stretching all across South London and then buggered off to @TheLidoCafe for our entertainment.

The food was excellent, although it couldn’t quite compare with the spectacle of penny farthings and tandems racing around Herne Hill.

There’s still seven months or so of cycling at SE24 to go this summer. The slight early season blip isn’t going to get in the way of me spinning around the track before the Great Escape.

Chapeau!

And so after the working party last weekend in SE24, early Saturday morning and we were ready to roll out for another season of outdoor track cycling at Herne Hill Velo.

Chapeau!

I’ve got big plans for this season: to try and finish it. It’s a hell of a long stretch from the Ides of March, all the way through until the autumnal days of October.

In-between there will no doubt be days when the weather gets the better of us, and with larger plans looming elsewhere come the end of summer, best to make hay ‘n all that.

If you have told the fine folk at VCL three weeks ago that we would be rolling out in rotation on Saturday morning, you would have been suspected of having taken a particularly bad knock to the head without wearing a bicycle helmet.

But woh - where did that cold snap go? Bright blue South London skies awaited my arrival at Herne Hill. The track looked splendid following the spring clean last week.

I really think the new racing schedule is going to work well this season. 9-10 am for the juniors removes the novices from bunching with the kids, as well as keeping the track clear for the intermediates only at 10am.

Ah yes, the intermediates. This is the banding of which I’m supposed to belong in. Technically a veteran, but still hanging on to hopes of Herne Hill glory.

Shortly after 10am, I cleated my ride, and rolled out nervously around the first bank. It was like I had never been away. The first breakaway group got my heart rate up. By the second and I could feel the blood pumping through every vein in my body. This is what it’s all about. It’s got to be better than the weekly supermarket shop on a Saturday morning.

Holding back the novice riders until after the intermediates, also allows VCL to experiment with the schedule. Bumps and Lumps was a new discipline for me, and one which I found rather hairy.

You follow the lead rider in a single string, as a route up and down is weaved all the way around the historic Herne Hill track. The thinking is to improve your awareness and handling abilities. The reality for me was that I almost ended up with a bump and a lump.

Rotation finished the first session of the season - a ride of stamina as the pace picks up with each lap. This was more like it, although I bonked as the pelaton broke away for a sprint finish.

But it’s early days down in SE24. I’ve got seven months in which to refine my track riding skills. There is much work to do.

It’s surprising how smooth the transition from road racing to the track is. You soon remember the small things, such as the idiosyncratic track hand signals, or the need to stick with the pack, else suffer the fate of bonking alone on the banks.

Come midday, and I de-cleated and hit the shakes. From my shoulders down to my fingernails, my arm and hands were in freefall. The cycle back to Sunny Stockwell on the Moulton had a fair share of bumps and lumps along the way.

Same again next Saturday.

Chapea!

The first cyclo cross of the new decade down at Herne Hill proved to be the perfect head clearer. Not that I was in need of a head clearer.

An early start some eighteen hours earlier meant that my personal high spirits had peaked sometime in the early hours of 2010. Which is why I didn’t race (plus the fact that I am a total girl when it comes to getting my bikes dirty.)

It’s truly wonderful that cyclo cross seems to have found a natural home down in SE24. Being an outdoor track, le velo is only available to race for eight months of the year. With the a sizable grass banked perimeter bordering Burbage Road, plus a little creativity cutting through the centre of the track, a first class cyclo cross course is now in operation for the winter months.

The New Year’s Day roll out was more of a social event than a serious fixture in the season. The big boys are racing around like mucky pups next week, and so Friday was the ideal warm up event ahead of the serious racing.

We arrived in time to see the start of the Madison. It’s an event that I don’t understand, the riders probably don’t understand, the race officials perhaps don’t understand and no doubt Bradley Wiggins and Mark Cavendish still don’t entirely understand understand either.

The basic premise is for teams of two riders to take it in turns at putting the laps in. This partnership was perfect for father and sons, couples, and even brothers and sisters, to all get a dirty backside on the New Year Bank Holiday.

Ah yes, the mud: I’m told that it’s all part of the attraction of the discipline. I was reduced to putting a scented hankie over my nose when a cyclo cross kid wheeled his mud machine past my freshly polished Moulton.

The Herne Hill course soon started to cut up. With little mudguard action in place, the laundry bill looked expensive. No worries - riders could pick up a lycra bargain at the bonkers bicycling jumble sale, being staged at le velo car park. These too are also becoming firm favourites in the Herne Hill calendar.

As tradition dictates, the dawn of a New Year is a time to look ahead. The cyclo cross was a great place to catch up on all the VCL gossip, as the track enters the new year, still fenced in by the pathetic political manoeuvrings of both Southwark Council and the mysterious Dulwich Estate.

Tessa Jowell? She said that? Blimey. Kate Tally Hoey did what? Seriously? And as for Boris? Cripes (although we all knew that, anyway.)

With an athletic pairing taking the chequered flag in a time just under an hour, I was somewhat tempted to take part in cyclo cross. Twenty-four hours later, and following a rather muddy road race with the lovely Dulwich Paragon, and I felt that I wasn’t really missing out much on the brown pants lycra action.

Cyclo cross it seems is the new triathlon, which we all know is the new marathon. It’s the boom discipline within cycling, and it’s not hard to see why. Athletic ability doesn’t give you much advantage; nerves and technical handling are all important.

Next year. Maybe.

Chapeau!

Halloween, and a young man’s thoughts turn towards the witching hour down at Herne Hill. Events conspired for the fragrant mrs onionbagblogger and I to head south bound to SE24, for an afternoon and evening of freakish fun, in what can often be the forgotten corner of South London.

First up was the inaugural Herne Hill Expo [pdf] The rather fanciful name may be out of character for an area not usually known for its self-promotion. The geographical positioning of being trapped between the borders of Lambeth and Southwark makes Herne Hill something of an ostracised hermit within the local area.

Improving the local environment and putting in place tangible benefits for the community, is often at the whim of the rival political parties that divide and govern Herne Hill. It may not be quite an iron fist, but Lambeth Labour and the LibDems of Southwark don’t make for the best of bedfellows. Caught in the middle of course are the constituents.

The idea behind the Expo is to make a start at transforming this image. At its most crude level, the afternoon was seen as an opportunity for service providers (@lambeth_council) to engage with the electorate on a non-political platform. Good intentions, but how do you entice the locals out into the street for an afternoon of meet ‘n greet with some local politicians?

A visible campaign has built up around Herne Hill over recent weeks, spreading the message of The Expo. At the centre of this message has been the transformation of the Herne Hill tunnel from a dimly lit p*** alley at the side of the railway station, to become a public work of art that stimulates debate and awareness.

A couple of local artists have created a wordscape design, running from one end of the tunnel to the other. This has served as a stimulus for the main event on Saturday afternoon, the Herne Hill Hunt.

Organisers of The Expo identified early on that an activity had to be in place in order to get people to come out and participate. With much of Herne Hill being hidden, the treasure hunt was the perfect vehicle for letting people know that there’s much more to the area than being a political boundary borough.

My Treasure Hunting companion and I approached our Herne Hill afternoon rather late in the day, with the skies already beginning to bruise over SE24. The magnificent sight of a young couple cycling on a tandem, decked out in tweed and with a trail of tin cans and a Just Married sign on their back, convinced us that yep, there is much more to Herne Hill than simply traffic congestion.

We kept with the two wheels theme, and with the aid of an iPhone and a little help from following a young mother and child around on a bike, more or less managed to keep on course with the various checkpoints.

Our lack of Herne Hill knowledge was no hindrance - this was the whole point of the Hunt, to try and learn something new about the area. The clues were clever (‘look for a noble emporium‘ - Noble’s newsagents of course,) and in the time frame of just over an hour, we had traversed the triangle taking in Denmark Hill, Herne Hill and Half Moon Lane.

A brief stop off back at Expo HQ to hand in the forms, and then we headed across the Dulwich Road to the lovely @thelidocafe. Much like the Herne Hill Hunt, our timing wasn’t great. Too late for lunch, an hour or so early for the Halloween menu [pdf] put together by chef.

No worries, the Lido Cafe are an accommodating crowd; a delightful chorizo sausage served with fries, plus buttermilk squash ravioli for the lady, all washed down with some red wine and we were ready for stage three of the Herne Hill Halloween experience.

I was tempted to see if I could sneak out around the back the lido cafe for a cheeky, moonlit Halloween dip. But that would just be irresponsible, not to mention bloody freezing.

The final leg of the Herne Hill Halloween experience was le velo for the Muddy Hell cyclocross event. Cycling past Herne Hill station, and en route we noticed that The Expo party was in full swing. Well, it would be rude not to offer some support, wouldn’t it?

A salsa band was brightening up a rather damp evening in a corner of South London, pulling in a sizable crowd as well. The ingenious Indian Eye restaurant opposite was staging a projection of local images in the window. The lovely @mayoroflambeth was doing his civic thing, and local businesses had very kindly donated ample food servings and a steady supply of mulled wine. We stayed at the station for possibly slightly longer than was polite, enjoying the company, and the generous rounds of mulled wine.

And then finally, finally, sometime slightly before 7pm and we were velo bound. Cycling along Burbage Road and the shock was of all the Halloween activity. Things get slightly scary back at the SW8 base, but Sunny Stockwell this most certainly wasn’t. It seemed that every other house was decked out in Halloween decorations. The level of dedication was easily on par with the more traditional Christmas celebrations.

We dodged some trick or treaters, and then rolled up for Muddy Hell, the Halloween cylocross event at le velo, proudly staged by VCL and Rollapalooza.

Much like Herne Hill and South London earlier in the afternoon, cyclocross is often the Cinderella of cycling in SE24. Track riding rules, and rightfully so. But VCL also boasts a thriving junior cyclocross club.

There was a series of racers for juniors, women, men and vets. I think I fall somewhere in the sub-vet section, and so wisely left my set of wheels firmly locked up in the VCL club lock up.

Racing under lights added to the atmosphere. Most riders had made the effort with a Halloween meets lycra style of racing kit. This was matched with the crossover of messenger meets serious sportive competitors. Adding to the ambience was a DJ and a roller racing set up. If it hadn’t been for that fourth (or was it fifth?) mulled wine outside Herne Hill station, I would have been tempted to have a spin on the rollers myself.

The cyclocross course itself was something of a killer. Circumnavigating the perimeter of the track, and then crossing into the centre and with a huge ten-foot drop at one stage, I don’t think it was designed for my track bike. A bunny-hopping VCL rider played to the crowd, delighting the beer tent boys as he jumped over the hurdle after every lap.

The coming together of VCL and Rollapolooza shows what can be achieved from two quite diverse groups. The common theme is of course cycling - how each organisation goes about getting there are quite different. Herne Hill simply provided the perfect setting for a meeting of the clans.

And so some eight hours after setting off for the forgotten terrains of Herne Hill, we arrived back in Sunny Stockwell after an afternoon and evening of treasure hunting, poolside dining and floodlit cyclocross. I’ll have to remember not to forget about Hill Herne more often.

Chapeau!

Never underestimate the kindness of the bicycling community. Never underestimate the kindness of any community - that is, after all, the fundamental building block which brings together disparate individuals to reach a shared goal.

But when that shared goal is to get my track bike, um, back on the track, it’s more of an individual pursuit, and one that alone, I’m not very good at.

I had a so so Saturday morning track session down at le velo. The legs surprisingly said yes, the bike said no. Track cycling is the ultimate in precision performance between rider and machine. You need to have full confidence in your bike, knowing that the slightest increase or decrease in power, and the pedals will respond and you can power home in safety.

It’s a deceiving discipline; much of track cycling is played out in the mind. You need to clear your head of all thoughts around you, and have a truly clear path ahead, both on the track and where your mind is heading. The slightest mechanical worry and you might as well bonk on the banks.

Much like my mind, my track bike was ticking away as I rolled out of Herne Hill, early Saturday morning. There was a very slight catch on the pedals with each rotation. Something was slightly wrong, and my concern was that the bike was going to fall apart on me.

I persisted around the rotation race, not helped when I was stung by a bee underneath my helmet at the start of the fifty-lap sprint around the SE21 circuit. Each time I tried to put the pressure on, my right pedal omitted a slight click against my cleat, coupled with a banging head from the b****y bumblebee.

Not a good place to be for mind, body and bike.

The mechanics of a track bike are so pure and simple, that even the most simpleton of bicycling grease monkeys should be able to find their way around the chain set with a spanner.

Ahem.

Clueless and lycra clad, I approached Eric, the Chief Club Mechanic down at Herne Hill for Velo Club Londre. Eric is a stalwart of South London cycling. His non-paid role basically means servicing the fleet of club track bikes down at le velo each Saturday morning. He shouldn’t have to be dealing with cyclists like me, who struggle fitting a cleat to a new pair of track shoes.

The problem was immediately identified - my crank needed realigning, having loosened out of the bottom bracket with every rotation around the Herne Hill track. It was close to coming off, something that would have made the bumblebee sting look like a minor inconvenience, had I bought down the entire pelaton during my sprint (ish) finish.

Eric very kindly clamped my frame down and got to work with his tool set. It was a tricky, fiddly job, balancing the crank either side, and then locking it all back into place. Forty-five minutes later and the job was complete. I offered to pay, but my offer was immediately dismissed. Forty-five minutes of mechanical time at Evans will cost you something slightly more than the genuine kindness of the bicycling community.

It is the many unpaid volunteers, like Eric, who make up the genuine community found within cycling clubs. Their own racing days may have been ridden out many summers ago, but they remain around the track or circuit, attached to the love of the bicycle and the friendship they can find from like-minded people.

There’s a VCL mechanical club day coming up soon. All club members are encouraged to help out, fixing up the fixies at the tail end of the season, and generally keeping the track in order. I can’t see that I’m going to be much use, but a day on handlebar tape duties is the least I can do to honour the kindness of the bicycling community.

Chapeau!

Herne Hill Halloween

A little known fact of le velo is that there is also a thriving cyclo cross community sitting right next to the track. It may not be the most rock ‘n roll of bicycling lifestyle choices, but this could all change with the help of some promotion from the Rollapaluza crowd. Having made roller-racing sexy once again, Rollapaluza are now turning towards cyclo cross at Herne Hill on Halloween night. Chapeau!

Serco Secure Le Velib

From the company that is responsible for running the DLR and Woolwich Ferry, comes… a whopping £140m budget to roll out le velib scheme across London. In principle, yes; it’s all about the bike, after all. But the good folk of velorution raise some valid points about the budget, and how it could be better spent.

And finally…

Heads up @BillBuffalo for MC Spandex and the semi-pro Vs fakenger skit. I know which side of the saddle I sit upon.