To The Oval! …early on Thursday evening for the second time this week where I didn’t get to see any play.
No worries - the rather late, late luncheon of 6pm was the occasion of the Surrey Members’ AGM.
Previous stagings of this prestigious event have involved me raising my hand to vote, oblivious to what I am endorsing, necking a freebie bottle of red in the England suite and then cornering young Rory HB and scaring the shit out of the peroxide Special One with my ‘tired and emotional‘ cricket rants.
Chin chin.
But this year I took the decision to remain sober.
Sort of.
I’m pleased that I did with an agenda that told you plenty about the future direction of the club if you were alert enough to decipher the two messages being delivered by the two Dicks.
Ah yes - Dick and Dickie: Chief Exec Richard Gould and Chairman Richard Thompson.
It’s a double act nickname that both of them have grown to embrace. The two Dicks have made cock ups in the past, but there is a genuine feeling that the proud old club is *possibly* about to overcome the recent on the field difficulties.
I arrived fashionably late, missing the prep talk from new Head Coach Graham Ford.
Whoops.
Expect a relegation to the Stiffs as your punishment.
“Degree of patience”
…was apparently the theme.
The Surrey Members’ have more patience than the team currently has virtues. It’s al about the Long Room waiting game, Comrades.
The Minutes from the previous AGM were agreed. A proposer and seconder were called for. I came *that* close to finally getting my name recorded on a Surrey Cricket item of offialdom.
The adoption of the Annual Accounts was the next ROCK ‘N’ ROLL act up for voting. It has all made for fascinating toilet reading over the past couple of weeks. I had no hesitation in raising my hand, knowing that the brown caps haven’t had a brown pants financial ride of late.
And then it was time for Chief Exec Dickie Gould to give his prep talk to the Members:
“Last season was a great disappointment.”
Never a man to state the obvious, our Dickie.
“The Championship is where we judge ourselves as a club. We want to be known as the powerhouse venue [eh?] for English cricket.”
And here lies the paradox of cricket down at The Oval. It is no secret within the game that the club strives for international glory as a Test match venue, often at the expense of developing Surrey as a first (second) class County side.
It was a brave and transparent approach from the Chief Exec. He said all the right things regarding team development, but didn’t hold back when it came to Oval Empire building.
Membership remained stable last year - something of a surprise given that 2014 is a non-Ashes summer. There has been an impressive 25% increase from four years ago.
“A couple of years ago we were guilty of not having a sufficient complaints system”
…admitted Dickie. I’m still slightly pissed off about my 2002 Test match experience when we were seated in the Peter May right next to the dustbin store.
Phew, what a stinker, etc.
And that was just the cricket experience out on the pitch.
“We want this to be the place where England win”
…added Dickie.
I thought he said “wee” to be honest.
The considerable commercial growth was then addressed. Well-batted Surrey in removing any charges when buying a ticket with a debit card. These remain place for credit card bookings though.
Ah yes - credit.
We’ll come back to that one, Comrades…
The 1,000 new OCS seats were touched upon.
“We hope you haven’t noticed.”
Nope. A post-tea game of Spot the New OCS Seats was even undertaken by my cricketing companion and I during day 3 of the Essex bore draw. The east and west wings have discreetly had an extension over the summer.
“We now have the best front gate in Test cricket.”
“I hope that this dismisses the comment made by the Leader of Lambeth Council that we are nothing but a walled garden.”
OUCH.
Dickie then made the point that the new concourse isn’t cluttered with commercial crap, but it is a genuine place for cricket fans to meet and share stories. The club has to be credited for this.
And then it was all about ‘One Oval Square.’
Oh Lordy.
This is the ambitious project that will hopefully see Surrey submit a planning application in front of Lambeth Council at the end of the summer, taking the capacity up to 28,000.
Don’t worry folks - you should still be able to get a ticket for any early season County Championship matches…
The “threat” of the VNEB development down the road was mentioned. This was very much a piece of planning positioning by the club, keen to push back all the Vauxhall vanity bollocks and remind folk that The Oval has a proud history in the area.
It was almost like a willy waving contest.
Speaking of which, here comes the second of the two Dicks.
Chairman Richard Thompson spoke of how the club has recently bought up the rights for 130 old Pathe news clips featuring Surrey that haven’t been viewed for decades.
“These are Surrey Cricket gold dust”
The club is planning to build a mini cinema at The Oval to showcase the historic footage.
I’d like to throw Comrade Wolfie into the running order.
Two Dicks done and dusted, time for a Dickinson.
Honorary Treasurer Alan Dickinson couldn’t stop grinning over the fact that Surrey has reported a £2m profit before tax for the past financial year.
“We were cautious ahead of the Champions Trophy. What impressed us most was the growth of domestic T20 cricket.”
Domestic income grew by a WHOPPING 90%. This is set to continue with the T20 Blast [URGH] fixtures being slogged out on a Friday night this season.
“We still need to make money.”
And then some.
The debt is down to £25m. The Honorary Treasurer is keen for this to be increased back up to £30m to enable future club expansion.
Either that or KP is more powerful in the club than we first thought…
“I am very comfortable with that level of debt”
…confirmed Alan Dickinson.
I shuffled slightly nervously in my England Suite seat.
Q and A’s then followed.
The usual fixture folly featured.
The GREAT MAN Alec Stewart came out with some classic one-liners:
“I can confirm that Graeme Smith isn’t Irish. Yet.”
The quality of the PA system was questioned, as was the intent of the club to return Championship cricket back to the Whitgift in Croydon.
“Struggling facilities”
…was given as the reason why Croydon remains off the Surrey Cricket radar.
The pre-collapse (economy, not cricket) plan for a Surrey Cricket hotel now seems to have firmly been padded away. Plenty of backtracking has taken place. It was explained that the hotel would have taken control away from the club, plus it wouldn’t have been possible to walk around the ground.
Quite a U-turn from the previous position.
Meanwhile the club continues to investigate the possibility of buying up the much-missed old Cricketer’s pub at the back of the Peter May.
As for naming rights for the Oval?
“This will never be the Wonga Oval, as long as I am Chairman”
…added Dickie T.
And thank the chuffers for that.
“Why do young players leave Surrey?”
…asked one Member.
A telling answer came from the GREAT MAN:
“It’s all about the judgement of other people who are now no longer here.”
Ouch.
El Pres Sir Trev then did his best stand up routine, keen to obviously continue sampling the best bottle of red on offer in the England Suite.
I necked a couple of glasses, looked around for any players to press the flesh with, and then settled on finishing off what was left of the freebie booze.
A better night than it was on the pitch last season.
And I was sober for most of last season…
Chin chin.