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To the Town Council Offices on Monday evening for an eve of Solstice pagan sacrifice, aka as a Wivenhoe Town Council monthly meeting. Peace, love and understanding were in the estuary air, and so was a Conservative Borough Councillor.

Cripes.

Suited and booted (me, not the Conservative Borough Councillor) and arriving fashionably late as ever, it was standing room only around the top civic table. I perched my backside strategically on the edge of the Press table, sitting on the fence and waiting to hear all about parking problems and dog pooh.

Eleven fine members of the public were left scrambling for seats for THE hot ticket in town that night. Bell ringing practice in Wivenhoe is on Wednesdays, Comrades.

Joining the Little People was a rare and welcome appearance from LibDem Councillor Manning of the Cross ward, Conservative Councillor Quarrie of the Quay and the ever present, ever smiling Councillor Ford, Labour’s red flag waving #workingforwivenhoe Comrade also from the Quay.

It’s not quite Never the Twain, but the political hot potato that was on everyone’s lips was when the chuffers will the Borough Councillors get it on with the Town Councillors?

Concern has been expressed by the UNPAID Town Councillors that communication with the big boys and girls of the Borough is not flowing quite as frequently as perhaps it should.

With Section 106 wonga floating around in Wivenhoe - a classic you scratch my back brown envelope time - the Town Councillors want to make sure that Borough Councillors are singing from the same St Mary’s Wivenhoe hymn sheet.

“Riches I heed not, nor man’s empty praise,
Thou mine Inheritance, now and always.”

And whilst yer at it, let’s chuck some cash from the Cook’s payback fund on a much needed new zebra crossing outside of the Co-op, Comrades.

It’s a fun filled life being a Borough Councillor. Sacrifices have to be made, and we’re not talking about the Solstice shindig on the muddy banks of the Colne either. Friday night has been put aside as a possible timeslot when Never the Twain will divvy up the local dosh.

Phew, rock ‘n roll.

A bit of local admin, and then we were straight in with Reports from the Borough and County Councillors.

It’s all about accountability, I tell ya…

Councillor Young, Labour’s representative on Essex County Council (seriously) was unavailable, but had kindly submitted a written report:

“New ways of working with Highways should make it easier for 20mph zones to be introduced around both schools in Wivenhoe. I have been in constant dialogue with Tracy Chapman, the Highways advisor on this.”

Hurrah!

Hang on - Tracy Chapman? 20mph? Talk about a Fast Car, etc.

Sticking with the #workingforwivenhoe Comrades, and Councillor Ford of the Quay was next to address the meeting:

“I called in the planning application for Rectory Hill. I was unhappy with the visibility of the approach, and the drainage. Highways are happy with the visibility, and I have been advised that the drainage concerns are a civil matter.

My concern about the limited parking space was upheld. The developer has hastily added in four extra parking spaces. The planning application has now been passed.”

Up towards the Cross ward and our two LibDem representatives have also been busy with congestion. A rare absence from Councillor Cory (pressing matters on the Policy Panel) but a written submission instead:

“I have been pressing the University about fixing a date for the Clingoe Hill closure ahead of the start of the Knowledge Gateway development. This has now been moved to the start of the summer holidays, to try and limit the congestion. I still expect we will have one - two weeks of aggravation.”

And then some.

Defying the #workingforwivenhoe election period claims that *ahem* “no LibDems are in Wivenhoe,” the Love Me I’m a Liberal lot then had safety in numbers with Councillor Manning of the Cross ward offering up his report to the Town Council:

“I am now sitting on the Planning Committee at Colchester Borough Council. NOTHING will get through.”

Cripes.

“I also have a new notebook to keep track of all the potholes that continue to appear.”

Yeah, and possibly a pitch to become a Glum Councillor as well.

Fine work, though fella.

It’s not quite a case of shuffling the deckchairs on the Titanic, but Conservative Councillor Quarrie of the Quay reported:

“I have been moved off Planning and now sit on Licensing.”

Which must be bad news for the 24/7 nightclub that I had planned for the Quay.

“Parking around the Cook’s development remains a key issue. The road has yet to be adopted by the County Council, which causes problems when we are trying to police it.”

Eight years and counting, my good Councillor…

Also giving cause for concern is the re-routing of the 74 bus route. Peter Kay, the Public Transport Representative explained how First Group, the current franchise operator, has sneakily slipped in a new route, which completely bypasses the town, turning off for Clacton instead.

“How ridiculous,” commented Councillor Kraft. She wasn’t alone in her observations and a polite, but purposeful letter is probably being penned from WTC right now.

The concern is that the move has been poorly advertised. Yoof may catch the bus, expecting a journey into Wivenhoe. With the sudden turn off, they could be out of town and out of funds as they speed off for an impromptu away day at the seaside.

A lengthy conversation then followed about the 20mph zone along the railway bridge at the bottom of the town. I became completely lost; I wasn’t alone.

Speaking in relation to transport matters, Peter Kay then posed the question:

“What does Wivenhoe Town Council propose to do about the annual nonsense that is the Wivenhoe May Fair?”

Cripes.

Awkward.

Having had this curveball thrown at him from across the civic chamber, Mayor Needham composed himself and offered up the reply that the May Fair Committee are working with WTC on future solutions.

Moving on…

Perhaps a bit of Planning to get the party back on track? Former Councillors Liddy and Purdey have been granted special powers (oooh!) to continue the fine work that they have started in representing WTC when it comes to all things Cook’s.

As for that old family favourite of the planned new Wivenhoe Surgery? Councillor Lodge updated with news that the deal is “far from dead.” The PCT has put the plan to the Doctor’s at the old surgery to see if they want to move forward.

Having a pre-defined national NHS policy as a framework in which to make these decisions would be nice.

Hey hoe.

In WTC Personnel news - THIS JUST IN: New litter picker James has impressed so much that he has been awarded a permanent position after the successful completion of his trial.

Hurrah!

Handling the aftermath of May Fair must have been a stern test, and one that James handled magnificently.

Onto the best bit - the Best Value Committee (aka secretly as the pre-WTC prepping meet where the real Council business is decided - behind closes doors - or so the suggestion has been made to me…)

Anyone been to Stanway of late? Apart from offering up a most splendid jazz club, my knowledge of our Colchester near neighbours is somewhat limited. This is all about to change, with WTC proposing to adopt the Stanway system of committees for local governance. The buggers better have the ACE Working Woods Party.

Back to Wivenhoe however, and in a turkeys voting for Christmas move, WTC agreed unanimously to foot the bill to pay for Mayoral badges for ex-Mayor’s.

Mmm…

It’s a badge of honour, and probably on balance one that is a worthy memento for the UNPAID work of Wivenhoe Town Councillors during their hectic year of civil service.

A slight shuffle along the press bench, and it was here that I made my strategic switch to *shhh* the Conservative hot seat.

Cripes.

All the best parties finally kick into action as the night closes in, and as the public chamber emptied and m’Conservative friend departed to ponder why Wivenhoe still hasn’t got a new surgery under the inspiring leadership of the Coalition, I played musical chairs.

Mr Mayor updated WTC about his activities, in what has been a very busy first month in office:

“I have attended sixteen formal events in the past month. The highlights included visiting Wivenhoe Youth Hub [ditto] the parade of the 16 Air Assault Brigade through Colchester, the opening of the *shhh* Quiet Garden at Broomgove Shcool and the Helping Hands AGM.”

Pleased to report that Helping Hands appears to be in sound financial hands, thanks to some very generous donations locally.

Five points then came out of the Community Safety feedback:

(i) Inconsiderate parking remains an issue (even though WTC, after taking police advice, decided not to implement a considerate parking scheme within the town…)

(ii) The local crime figures are low. A slight increase in burglary however has been recorded. The police have suggested that this is possibly a local gang, with laptops and TV’s being the main items going missing.

(iii) Traffic routes to Cook’s Shipyard have deviated.

Eh?

It appears that companies that don’t take the designated route down Valley Road are in danger of losing their contracts. Keep yer eyes peeled around *cough* Queens Road, Comrades.

(iv) Ball games by the Medway are showing some signs for concerns. Elder kids are getting slightly enthusiastic, with the balls entering into the road.

(v) And finally Speed Watch - this is now being rolled out during the school run hours, with a focus upon Bobbitt’s Way and Elmstead Road.

A brief break for the passing around the chamber of the official civic spearmints (receipts available for inspection on request) and then whaddya know - apt timing and Finance.

Quotes are being sourced for a possible asbestos survey for the William Loveless Hall toilets. It’s a dirty job, but someone’s got to do it, etc.

In Correspondence news and an appeal for support from WTC for the emerging Radio Wivenhoe group has been received. This is not necessarily financial, but an endorsement.

Granted, with Mr Mayor proudly declaring:

“This is a positive feature for Wivenhoe. It is an aid for further communication and helps to promote the town. We earnestly support Radio Wivenhoe.”

Splendid.

Someone should sign that man up for a guest spot on Wiv Chat.

Oh, hang on…

A rallying call then went out for players to take part in the annual Town Cricket Match on the evening of 13th July at Rectory Road. The official civic quotation that came out on the evening is:

“WE WANT TO WACK THEM.”

Cripes.

Any Other Business?

With the Ten Acres development looking likely to start soon, a new access road will be in place within Wivenhoe. Peter Hill has formally suggested naming this in memory of Dr Ted Palmer.

Plus no WTC meeting can be complete without the perennial Engine Shed rumour.

HONK!!!!

Massive rumour alert: minuted, but not necessarily economical with the truth, the continual pub gossip of the old Engine Shed being bought up by a developer wrapped up the meeting.

Any views?

A stunned silence filled the chamber.

Time for that pagan sacrifice in the Network Rail car park, Comrades?

Serving Brightlingsea, Wivenhoe and Nearby Villages, the simple sword of truth and the trusty shield of British fair play that is The Brightlingsea and Wivenhoe Chronicle is with us once again.

Hurrah!

It’s a cracking read in The Chronicle once again this fortnight. With those out of towners @TheGazette getting it all so very wrong over the May Fair story, it is pleasing to see local scribe Scoop Scarpenter present a Tell It Like It Is approach to local news reporting.

But first - how’s about a pic of a handsome chap wearing a gold chain, grinning out at you from the front cover?

Oh goody.

The Towns’ New Mayors is the lead, with a nice photo (taken by a hit and miss snapper) of Councillor Needham, the new Mayor of Wivenhoe:

“Born and bred in Wivenhoe, Robert Needham is now starting his third year on Wivenhoe Town Council. He is a former police dog handler and Sergeant, serving with Essex Police over a period of 30 years, and later becoming Community Operations Manager for Colchester Borough Council.”

He also runs a tight ship when it comes to chairing meetings, not to mention being a charming host at Open Gardens.

The Chronicle also documents Mayor Needham’s work on the severe weather policy for the town, as well as his role in helping to set up Helping Hands in the town.

“Wivenhoe is certainly diverse.”

We wish him well..

Likewise for Radio Wivenhoe, the new online broadcasting station that has been set up down at the Business Centre, which gets the p.2 treatment. Mr Mule writes:

“Wivenhoe now has its own radio station which will go live in early July. The station was initially the idea of Jerry Davis, who’s long harboured ambitions to create a radio station in the area.”

The Chronicle reports how forty volunteers turned up at The Greyhound last week to express an interest. The medium term plan is to apply for a community radio licence in 2013.

“Many of the volunteers seemed to be of the opinion that insufficient radio airtime was being allocated to forms of music outside of mainstream tastes. A majority of people at the meeting thought that Wivenhoe had the flair and breadth of talent to eventually create a radio station tailored to the town’s own needs.”

Not ‘arf.

The first Wiv Chat recording with a hit and miss *ahem* broadcaster has already been lined up for this week.

Blimey.

“For listeners, Radio Wivenhoe can be found at www.radiowivenhoe.co.uk. The email address is [email protected].”

You could even try [email protected]

Cripes.

Keeping with the Chronicle's catchy headlines, Independent Booksellers Week of Activities once again Tells It Like It Is:

“A number of activities for people of all ages will be organised in Wivenhoe as part of the Independent Booksellers Week. Run locally by the ever enterprising [and then some] Wivenhoe Bookshop, events start on 17th June at 6:30pm with a book launch of Truth or Dare, a collection of short stories.”

The Bookshop’s brilliant blog contains further… reading. Plus this might be an apt occasion to publish once again the first of hopefully many more @audioboo’s to come from the Bookshop.

Local scribe and all round good chap, Ben Thomas (@Heskey1992) writes an ACE May Fair round up on p.6: Musical May Fair Never Fails to Entertain.

Ben covers all three main stages, taking in the commanding Ady Johnson, the rising local star Lou Terry and even the festival favourite, the bonkers Mr Sonic Manipulator.

“This year’s event has certainly left the large crowd pleased with the musical performances. Individuals who had travelled from across the country and further afield had nothing but positive reviews about the year’s entertainment.”

A separate news story on p. 11 runs with:

“Disturbances Break Out at the May Fair“

It’s a clever journo trick played by Scoop, and one that the likes of @The Gazette would do well to learn from. May Fair 2011 was mainly about the music. You can’t cover up the police presence towards the end, but this wasn’t the headline news here.

“By mid afternoon there appeared to be a number of drunken youths acting aggressively and there were reports of bottles being thrown at members of the public and also fights breaking out in the field, in the adjacent wooded area, and also in The Avenue, Wivenhoe.

After calls were made to the police, two officers at first arrived, but by 6pm more than 40 police officers had been deployed to Wivenhoe to handle the various incidents.”

Hardly the “hundreds of youths” that @TheGazette got slightly over-excited with in its irresponsible, and inaccurate, reporting.

The Chronicle continues:

“A 20 year-old man from Marks Tey had been arrested prior to the main disturbance on suspicion of being drunk and disorderly and has since been charged with this offence and two offences of criminal damage.

Two 15 year-old boys were arrested just before 8pm on suspicion of assault and they have been bailed until 17th July while enquiries continue.”

Tell It Like It Is.

Meanwhile, the Battle of the May Fair makes for sombre reflection. Time to plan for 2012…

Moving on…

Who fancies an evening covering “immigration, religion, Zionism, Islamic jihad and the ongoing problem of people who are not yet middle class?”

Cripes.

Liam Mullone will bring all the above of to Wivenhoe during his performance at the Funny Farm at the Cricket Club 30th June. The Chronicle also reports Juliet Meyers and David Hannant are also appearing.

Meanwhile:

“Have you thought about joining the scouting adventure as a leader?”

Um…

p.7 carries the very urgent need for Wivenhoe Scouts to recruit a new scouting top dog. Further details via [email protected].

Ivan Sage writes a lovely review on p.10 of Wivenhoe’s ADP Theatre School’s production of Around the World 2 - Return Ticket, recently performed in Clacton. The show heads to the Charter Hall in Colchester on 25th June.

Local legends The Medlars meddling at Wivenhoe Folk Club on 7thJuly at The Flag are featured on p. 12; sharing the space is mention of the Helping Hands AGM at the Sailing Club on 16th June at 7:30pm. New volunteers welcome…

Now Hear This:

“The Hearing Care Centre will be holding its next Wivenhoe Open Day on 29th June at Wivenhoe Eyecare Opticians, 1 Belle Vue Road. Free, no obligation hearing tests and expert-advice on any hearing related problems are available.”

The Spanish Paintings exhibition at the Wivenhoe Gallery gets a plug on p.14, and that as they say is adios from Scoop for the next fortnight.

Fine work, fella.

A weekend downpour of Biblical proportions, which can only mean that it’s time for the summer publication of Wivenhoe News.

Blimey.

Sea Defences Saga Flows On is the lead story.

See what they’ve done there?

“There has been much anger and dismay caused by the stripping of vegetation from the seawalls in Wivenhoe alongside our tidal river, both downstream and upstream from the flood barrier.”

The bad science justification that was bungled out by the Environment Agency is also re-published, as is a very kind plug for *cough* the Wivenhoe Forum thread.

What’s new here is the offer by the Natural England - the spineless body that rubber stamped the destruction - to re-plant 5,000 “compensatory trees” - you break our legs and we say thank you when you offer us crutches.

Eight hundred and fifty have been put aside for the North Essex estuary. Don’t go getting your digging spades out just yet, Comrades:

“In the Colne Estuary they [Natural England] have provided 850 small tress to Brightlingsea Town Council for a site to the east of the town.”

If you stand at White House Beach on a clear estuary morning, and then squint out over the water with one eye closed, you may just be able to see the benefits of the trees bestowed upon our beloved Brothers in Brightlingsea.

Cheers.

No worries. What we need is a smiling picture of a lovely local lady to add some cheer to the sea defence doom:

“Workers of Wivenhoe - Shelia Scammell, Lollipop Lady.”

Lovely.

Wivenhoe May Fair 2011 gets the p.2 treatment, in something of an after the Lord Mayor’s Show airing. Time to move on, time to plan and time to restore May Fair as a community event for 2012.

Speaking of Mayor’s, Cllr Sinclair is captured in one of his final acts of civic duty in what has been a busy year. The Guide’s Wedding Party is all part of wearing the Wivenhoe civic chains.

But it’s not all about the Brownies or Girl Guides. On a more serious note, there is a plea on p.2 for a new Scout Leader for Wivenhoe:

“Let’s not beat about the bush: twenty youngsters, full of energy and enthusiasm [and then some] raring to take up the opportunity offered by the Scouting movement.”

This is a BIG role that really needs filling. The Wivenhoe News editorial on p.3 plays with similar themes:

“Off the Rails seems to be looking for pretty much a whole new team, the Wivenhoe Society is limping along with no Secretary and a very small committee, the WEA has been without a Chair for a year and is about to lose its Secretary.

One of the things that you often here in praise of Wivenhoe is ‘there’s so much going on here.’ Well folks - things only happen because people organise them.”

Wise word, but maybe it is a reflection of the work / life balance? There are only so many hours in the day and bills still need to be paid. It’s no secret that I have had to severely cut back on my out of hour’s unpaid activity of late.

On a more lighter note and any news article that contains the phrase: “superb French folk music, played on hurdy-gurdies [geddin there!] and bagpipes” has to be a winner. The Town Meets Gown event gets a mention on p.3.

Dr Philippa Hawley and Halcyon Palmer pen a simply superb local historical account on the various Wivenhoe surgeries dating back over the past Century. It is apt timing, what with the STOP / START / STOP farce of the new Wivenhoe surgery by the Fire Station continuing to stall.

I’m not going to re-publish any of the copy here - this article is worthy of your purchase of Wivenhoe News alone. More of the same please.

The Two Ronnies of Wivenhoe local politics, Cyril Liddy and Dave Purdey, are given the It’s Goodbye From Me, and It’s Goodbye From Him headline.

With sixteen and eight years respectively serving as unpaid Town Councillors, both Cyril and Dave are rightfully given a short column to say a fond farewell.

Of sorts…

Along with Sheila Scammell and her lovely Lollipop Lady tales on p.8, Alison Kent also carries an ACE interview with Ray the Rubbish, the retiring litter picker of Wivenhoe:

“I think you should try to keep the front of your property clean, like the old days. Have pride in where you live.”

Hear, hear.

I didn’t realise that the job was only fourteen hours a week - Ray has seemed to be ever-present during my short stay here. Good luck to James, Ray’s replacement.

Aquatic matters are the concern on p.11. Lifeboat Week gets a deserved plug, as does the Wivenhoe branch of the Royal British Legion:

“Remembrance is a very large part of the Legion’s ethos. Those who attend the Legion Wednesday evenings will know that those who have given their lives in Afghanistan and other places in the service of their nation are individually remembered.”

The building fund for the Legion has been boosted by a donation of over £2,000 from the Boxing Day walk staged by WORC. £690 was also raised at the ACE fireworks display. October 29th is already in the calendar for one of the best nights that Wivenhoe is able to offer.

Next door but one at The Nottage and there is a plug for Water Marks - the Summer Exhibition, featuring local artists Alison Stockmarr, Barbara Peirson and Pru Green.

The exhibition is open on Sundays from 2pm - 5pm until 11th September, and on Regatta Day on 23rd July. It is VERY good. There’s a blog post already being lined up…

Speaking of the Regatta, Wivenhoe News reports:

“There will be the usual wacky races and about thirty stalls and a brass band. The pram race will take place on 22nd July.”

Wivenhoe Youth Hub continues to grow and develop new ideas and partnerships. Page 12 updates with reports on the gig at the Philip Road Centre by local band Rising Soul, a go-karting event organised with Brightlingsea’s 4Youth (reckon we got the better name…) as well as the ACE archery and rowing evening.

What is rather humbling about The Hub is that those involved offer so much more back into the community. There was a considerable presence at the WivSoc riverbank clean up, help offered at May Fair, as well as support for the Crabbing Competition next month down by the Quay.

Likewise good news coming out of the ADP Theatre School:

“Angie Diggens has booked the Colchester Charter Hall for a show with her Wivenhoe students, combining the best of her last two shows at Clacton.”

Saturday 25th June at 7:30pm, £12 a ticket, details on 282020.

Helen Chambers writes a review of the Gilbert and Sullivan Society production of Oklahoma! at the Loveless Hall:

“The singing was faultless, the whole cast strong and talented.”

And keeping with the Wivenhoe artistic feel, Andy Brooke writes a well-deserved homage to Moving Image:

“It’s great to see people you know in the audience and have a genuine community atmosphere, rather than renting a DVD at home.”

Further details of the Moving Image summer schedule are up on m’blog over here.

The rock ‘n roll rollicking rollercoaster ride that is Radio Wivenhoe (blimey) get a plug on p.14, as does a call for “journalists, bloggers and poets” for Off the Rails. The Wivenhoe Poetry Prize looks forward to the 2011 results as part of the poetrywivenhoe evening at The Greyhound on the 23rd June. Meanwhile a new University of the Third Age art group is starting at the Loveless Hall on 14th September.

All ‘appening - all ‘appening I tell ya.

The good folk of Wivenhoe Bookshop have an entire page to plug future activity, such is the depth of the programme that is on offer. Too much to condense into a throwaway blog paragraph - my suggestion would be to head to the Bookshop for a perusal and a polite chat.

Or even access the new Wivenhoe Bookshop @audioboo account.

Blimey.

Fine work, ladies, mighty fine work.

Open Gardens on p.16 is caught between the publishing deadline and the sheer splendour that was the most splendid event this spring. It remains the highlight to date of My Year in Wivenhoe - wonderful, wonderful community spirit and pleasure.

Keeping it green fingered and Wivenhoe Bloom explain a little more about the brilliant use of dead space on the Wivenhoe Triangle that is overlooked by the Co-op, the opticians and Jardine:

“The site belongs to Highways - it’s classed as a verge - but WTC has a licence to plant. Jardine has contributed a very generous donation of £250 towards the cost of materials and plants.”

I have no shame in plugging local businesses that put something back into the community. An excellent gesture and kind contribution, Cristian. Jolly good work, Jardine.

The Parish Paths Partnership column penned by Helen Evans on p.16 puffs out a huge PHEW after finding out that Essex County Council continues to support the hyperlocal initiative.

Three Wivenhoe rights of way have been worked on by P3 to day: the side of Broomgrove Schools, the back of the houses in Broome Grove and the path along the top of the sea wall - you might have already heard about the latter…

So successful is the Wivenhoe P3 project that the group has now become a roving project. It is the A-Team of parish paths partnerships. If you have a problem with some overgrown bramble around the North Essex estuary, this crack team of cleaners should be first on your To Call list.

Cripes.

The joyous news coming out of p.17 and the WAGA update is:

“Spring is finally here.”

Hurrah!

Mayor Needham (woh!) explains more about the recent Beating the Bounds walk around Wivenhoe:

“The tradition of beating the bounds came from a time when no one, except the rich, could leave the parish without permission. It was a method of ensuring that local youngsters knew the limits of their parish.

It involved choir boys, the Parish Clerk and clergymen, leaving from the church armed with wands or sticks.”

Splendid. Soft lot, nowadays. The tradition was restored on 5th June this year. No young child was hurt in reviving this most excellent local tradition.

Wivenhoe bird watcher supreme Richard Allen explains very helpfully the difference between swifts, swallows and martins on p.18. Recent local sightings include:

“Nightingales have arrived in good numbers with a particularly vocal bird near the railway underpass along the Trail. Butterflies have enjoyed the good early weather.”

The ever-observant @AnnaJCowen (blimey) has also spotted a Jay along the Trail.

It all gets rather saucy at the foot of p.18 with Spoons, Spurtles and Spatulas.

Oh Lordy.

“Members of the Wivenhoe Woods Working Party recently attended a day’s course in green woodworking. Instruction was given on how to turn wood on a pole lathe and make spoons and other utensils using knives and a shave horse.”

Phew.

A Personal View of Transition Town Wivenhoe by the good Bob Mehew on p.19:

“I considered Wivenhoe a good place for a Transition Town: strong community spirit; a great awareness of climate change, environmental and sustainability issues; a willingness to get involved, to learn, to educate, to participate.”

TTW continues to grow and innovate. Wivenhoe is all the better for it.

The Wivenhoe Townscape Forum (*not* the Wivenhoe Forum…) gets a deserved article on p. 19:

“There is much in Wivenhoe of historic interest. There are 73 buildings in the town which are included in the English Heritage list of buildings of national interest.

The local list of historic assets is being carried out with the support of WTC and WivSoc, in order to list some of the best historical features of Wivenhoe which have not yet been recognised so that they do not become forgotten in the huge amount of new building and development.”

Bill Ellis writes a brilliant personal account of life at Cook’s Shipyard when the order books were full, with comparisons of the modern day site. Photos of the new jetty accompany this on p.22.

We return to the seawall clearance on p.24 with Peter Kennedy, the esteemed Editor of Wivenhoe News, explaining the depth of debate that this has delivered:

“We have received many pages of emails and submissions, and I shall attempt some sort of overview.”

A summary of comments and complaints follow. The consensus is that the Environment Agency has been crap at communication.

Fine work then from Wivenhoe News, which has put some direct Q’s to the EA, and received some rather direct answers:

“Q: Were any badgers found during the Wivenhoe work?

A: No - there were no badgers found for the Wivenhoe work.

Q: Are any of the proposed sites for compensatory replanting located in the Wivenhoe area?

A: No. Wivenhoe Marsh has found to be unsuitable.”

That’s what happens when you rip the entire natural habitat out, fellas.

Whoops.

The Surgery Saga Grinds On is the p.25 message from Bernard Jenkin, MP. Nothing to do with your national coalition NHS policy, I trust, Sir?

To be fair to the MP for Harwich and North Essex, our Conservative colleague airs a sense of frustration over the continued delay:

“The Government’s decision to review its health legislation raises the immediate concern that the new Wivenhoe GP surgery will be beset by even more uncertainty. There is no case for this. There is no excuse for further delays, and I have made this clear to the CE of the PCT.”

Speaking of the impact of coalition policies on a hyperlocal level, p.26 explains more about the £9k (!!!!) tuition fees that @Uni_of_Essex proposes to introduce.

Some PR fluff from the University is then re-printed. Twenty-one summers ago and I was fishing around for a University place. £9k (or the inflationary equivalent) would have put me off considerably. I wouldn’t have heard of Wivenhoe. I wouldn’t have moved here.

Oh how fickle is the Invisible Hand that pushes and prongs us through the life’s great adventures.

Blimey.

Town and Gown fiscal relations are restored with news of the £2,200 raised at November’s dinner at the Nottage, and now handed over as a bursary to five grateful local Wivenhoe students.

Broomgrove Infants updates on p.28 with reports of the Royal Wedding celebrations; Broomgrove Juniors explain more about the Outside / In project with Slack Space in Colchester.

Celebrations also at Millfields - a fond farewell to Angela Eglington after twenty-five years of teaching, as well as the school’s very own 30th birthday.

WivSoc rightfully reflects on the success of the riverbank clean up, with seventy volunteers stepping forward to help clean up the Colne. The sad winding up of the Wivenhoe Youth Theatre is lamented, with more positive news coming from the Colne School Choir’s recent performance in Wivenhoe.

Councillor Sinclair reflects upon his past year of civic service wearing the gold chain on p.30:

“I would have like to have seen a healthy election this year as we are entitled to 13 Councillors. Sadly there were only eleven candidates, hence no WTC election.”

Plus:

“A planning application has been lodged to demolish the St John Ambulance Hall for replacement with a privately owned project. I am part of a project to save the building. A group of people have come together, with funds, to keep it as a usable community facility.”

Mayor Needham writes on p.30 about the challenges that lay ahead for his administration:

“The proposed medical centre, a future for the former police station; reaching a satisfactory conclusion to the planning gains associated with the Cook’s Yard development and keeping an eye on the gains that maybe derived from any further development.”

The local politicos were caught cold ahead of publication deadlines. Columns from Essex County Councillor Julie Young, Colchester Borough Councillors Steve Ford and Mark Cory, were all penned before the re-election of the latter two.

Great fun to watch from the sidelines, mind.

On the sporting front and Wivenhoe Tennis Club has a call for new members; Andrew Nightingale, the Chair of the Wivenhoe and District Sporting Facilities Trust is also asking for help - financial help - for Broad Lane. Anymore updates on the mystery Mr X and his millions?

And to finish on some hyperlocal happiness - Wivenhoe Helping Hands publishes a rather humble piece, explaining more about the volunteer work of this organisation and how it is genuinely helping folk around the town.

Wivenhoe News is sold at the Co-op, Crossways, the Post Office, Bryans Newsagents and the lovely Wivenhoe Bookshop.

Woh - where to start with Wivenhoe Open Gardens 2011? How about twenty-eight private gardens becoming public open spaces for the weekend, and Wivenhoe being transformed into a local treasure hunt?

Blimey.

Green fingered and green envied gardeners delighted in the form and forna. Was it really less than four months ago when the big freeze threatened to wipe out the local Wivenhoe habitat? Or maybe that was just the Environment Agency…

Anyway - the wonderfully produced programme is a good pointer when trying to unravel the splendour of Open Garden weekend:

“Another bitter winter arrived in Wivenhoe in December, burying our gardens under a thick blanket of snow. As it slowly disappeared, the effects of some of the coldest weather for many years became apparent.”

Yep - one tree down in the Park Road region. Whoops.

“Most gardens will probably have lost some tender specimens in the last two winters, but nature is very resilient. The bulbs may have been a little slow to start flowering this year, but the sudden flourish of crocuses and the following blaze of daffodils lifted the spirits.”

And then some. HONK!! LOOK!! I’ve grown a daffodil. I’ve grown a b****y daffodil! I’m still dining out on that achievement by the way.

“The sunshine and mild weather in April have brought such a rush of growth that it seems unbelievable that there was ever any doubt of our gardens’ reappearance.”

I confess to being a non-believer when the makeshift ice rink beyond the back door bedded down for a month. Three months later and who would have thought that topless sunbathing in Wivenhoe (him, not her) would be possible?

But anyway - what of the twenty eight local gardens of delight that very, very kindly allowed locals to parade around the pansies and poppies in what is unofficially being dubbed RHS Wivenhoe by some?

Much like the gardens of Wivenhoe itself, @AnnaJCowen and I took very different approaches. You need a system, a plan, and a strategy. I favoured a regimented approach that was planned with military precision. I like neatly trimmed herbaceous borders.

The girl wanted to wander lonely as a cloud, refreshing in the boozers en route and seeing where the day would take her. The girl likes getting her knees mucky in the long deep grass.

A compromise of sorts was established: we would start off at the Quay, and then take a random walk up towards the Cross, taking in any of the Open Gardens that appeared en route.

It was thirsty work to be honest, but the booze could wait. There was something of a beer festival rationale however in ticking off all the gardens that we managed to clock up.

On our travels and we took in a great depth of different styles and use of space. A selection of the relatively new gardens down by the West Quay development improvised superbly. South facing front gardens became vegetable patches, making the most of the limited land available.

Clifton Terrace was a highlight for many, judging by our conversations with fellow wanderers around Wivenhoe. The incredibly high steeping garden looking down above the railway line was ingenious in the use of layers. A series of stairs had effectively been put in place, making the garden manageable and most adorable.

At the other end (and extreme) of Clifton Terrace was the garden come Country Park. We spent half an hour walking from one end to the other in the magnificent and majestic setting. You haven’t got a garden kind Sir - you have a country estate.

On a practical level and it was useful to observe how similar plants are performing when compared to what we have planted back at base. We’re holding our own, so to speak: “You have the largest courgette in Wivenhoe,” as the girl later complemented me with as we sipped away on a stiff one in the back garden.

The pride that Wivenhoe folk take in their gardens, and the genuine love of sharing their achievements really was quite humbling. Open Gardens only works with a tremendous amount of trust in place. The guest books around the garden tables rightfully heaped praise and thanks on all of those participating.

Many of the gatherings became social spaces for the afternoon. The tea, cakes and soft drinks added to the occasion. I can proudly say that I have now sat in the lovely, lovely garden in the old Falcon and be served up with a drink by the equally lovely, lovely hosts.

The good @MrBoom shadowed our movements as we swapped tales and tips at different stages around the town. Strangers became acquaintances, acquaintances become friends. It’s also a great way to find your way around a town that has many hidden back roads that you wouldn’t normally have any need to visit.

With 5pm on Saturday signalling that Open Gardens was closed for the day, we made a last minute dash up to enjoy the garden and company of the newly installed Mr Mayor. A warm welcome and a drink was our reward.

And then it was back down the town, and reflecting on how most gardens actually take the physical form and characteristics of their owners. I pondered my prize courgette and felt rightly proud.

Many, many thanks to all the very kind participants who opened up their private gardens to the public over the weekend. This has been the highlight of our Year in Wivenhoe so far.

Thanks also to the joint organisers:

“Wivenhoe Open Gardens is organised jointly by St Mary’s Church and the Wivenhoe Society. All profits are shared between the Church and other Wivenhoe causes chosen by the Wivenhoe Society; this year the Society’s beneficiary is Wivenhoe Helping Hands, a new venture to spread assistance to people in need of the community’s help and consideration.”

Anyone wanna see my cracker of a courgette next year?

Full flickr set over here.

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Picture: My back garden. Blimey.

With spring springing early in Wivenhoe and that miserable estuary winter now long since forgotten, a young (ish) man’s thoughts turns towards green fingers and watching the legend that is Alan Titchmarsh on TV every night as RHS Chelsea approaches.

Cripes.

Actually, ever the keen to keep it local, Wivenhoe Open Gardens looks like it will be stealing the thunder from Titchmarsh and chums over the coming weeks. The weekend of 21st - 22nd May is when all the green and good of Wivenhoe is opened up.

I’ve even got a half-decent lawn that anyone come round for a look at if they are really bothered.

Blimey.

Twenty-eight gardens have so far signed up. I love the idea of sharing, and then hopefully inspiring. It has taken @AnnaJCowen and I twenty summers together (oh Lordy) to actually have garden ownership. I’m hoping Titchmarsh will be coming my way with a Gold Standard next summer.

The good folk from Open Gardens update with:

“There will be plants to buy at several of the gardens, and a stand-alone Plant Stall at 89 High Street. There will be displays of paintings and other artwork on show at some gardens, and there will be musical entertainment in three of the gardens from In Accord, acapella singers with a wide repertoire of songs and singing styles. Refreshments to sustain you on your way around the village will also be on sale.”

Entry tickets (£4, free admission for children) will be on sale from early May. They will be available from Rollo Estates, the Wivenhoe Bookshop, Bryan’s Newsagents in the High Street, and at Crossways Stores at The Cross. On the weekend itself, tickets may be bought at Toad Hall (16 Colchester Road) and at 89 High Street, and some of the gardens over the weekend. You will also get a free Programme when you buy your ticket.”

All profits will be divided between St Mary’s Church and the Wivenhoe Society. This year, the latter will be donating their share to Wivenhoe Helping Hands.

I seriously can’t wait; I’ve evened ironed my best Titchmarsh slacks and sports casual.

A WivSoc Wednesday with a difference this week - it’s only the AGM of our lovely local town civic society.

Cripes.

To the Nottage, fashionably late, and not so fashionably dressed. I did make an effort on the nautical front, sporting one of my latest charity shop finds from a recent trip to the Oldest Recorded.

Turns out that I wasn’t alone. For all yer Essex Man jibes, Wivenhoe Man is something of a salty sea dog. I wasn’t the only WivSoc Sir wearing a captain’s sea hat (although I take pride in the knowledge that mine was the biggest.)

Blimey.

But anyway - what of the business end of the WivSoc year? It was all routine stuff, with Mr Chair admirably sticking to the agenda, and sticking it (in a very, very polite way) to anything that might upset the balance of the old meets the new, that makes Wivenhoe such a charming place to live.

I say routine stuff, but when the annual log book for events organised by WivSoc takes in (deep breath…) Open Gardens, wine tasting, the Fun Day, two heritage walks (8th May imminent) two riverbank clean ups (10th April even more imminent) the Craft Fair, the Quayside crabbing, the Colne talk, the post-Christmas party, Hanging Basket competitions, helping out at the Regatta, then you can see how a routine year in Wivenhoe needs some sense of formal organising.

Which is precisely where the incredibly hard working WivSoc committee members come in. The meeting opened with the approval of the previous minutes, plus some fool wearing a silly sea hat walking in halfway through.

Whoops.

Mr Chair’s Report was deliberately brief - new members were made to fee most welcome.

The Secretary’s Report was the opportunity to outline in more detail some of the fine work of WivSoc over the past twelve months. Monitoring and responding to planning applications remains the main priority.

New procedures mean that objections now have to be channelled through Borough councillors, thus further complicating matters. WivSoc wishes to place on the record the support so far offered by Cllr Steve Ford of Wivenhoe Quay ward.

The WivSoc Newsletter was praised, providing members with quarterly updates not only on Society matters, but also locals items of a more general interest. I hear that the next issue has a half-decent front-page pic snapped by some hit and miss photographer.

For a Society that is all too conscience (often too Conscience in my opinion) of the ‘mature’ nature of the membership, it is rather ace to see the modern interweb being explored.

Members’ email updates are sent out when ever a matter of urgency arises. The Secretary highlighted recent issues such as the proposal to build on the land near to Millfields School, the sea wall clearance, Transition Town Wivenhoe updates and the impact of the Knowledge Gateway on the town as recent examples of online dialogue.

Outside of the internal mechanisms of WivSoc and it was also mentioned that the Society has a formal voice at the NAP meetings, the Wivenhoe Townscape Forum (local list) and still my fave ever group, the Wivenhoe Wood Working Party.

A big thank you went out to Cllr Bob Needham for giving up his Wednesday evenings once a month to offer feedback on WTC meetings. Nice hat m’Cllr friend - never mind the length, feel the thickness etc.

The Secretary wrapped up by saying that the WivSoc membership continues to grow, as well as observing developments within the town that reflect well for the future of Wivenhoe.

Helping Hands, Moving Image, TTW and *cough* the Wivenhoe Forum - all of these are positioned well to help out in Wivenhoe as we face what is likely to be unstable economic times ahead.

Speaking of all things fiscal - it’s only the WivSoc Treasurer’s Report…

The Society’s finances are “healthy.” Let’s leave it at that. Well, not quite… A *shhh* three figure surplus was made in the last financial year. No deficit deniers upstairs at the Nottage on Wednesday night.

£200 was donated towards Wivenhoe in Bloom. All social events made a profit. The increase in membership numbers covers the running cost of WivSoc.

Thanks were rightfully given to our friends from Rollo Estates, Eyecare, the Co-op and EWS skip hire, for very kind sponsorship and support over the year.

Chair’s Q & A simply put out the request for any tree expert within Wivenhoe to step forward. Help is needed in identifying any trees in the town that might need a little TLC. Having accidentally managed to floor one in my own back garden after only three months of living here, I thought it best not to volunteer.

The election of officers followed, with the motion to keep subscription rates as the same level also passed.

Any Other Business?

Um, booze?

Almost. Time first for a splendid talk by Anthony Roberts, the esteemed Artistic Director @ColchesterArts. With a #hyperlocal artistic history boasting Francis Bacon (sort of,) the Lakeside (not quite Wivenhoe) and the grand plans for the old Engine Shed (um…) Anthony was preaching to the converted.

We heard a wonderful social history of the old building, covering a barely plausible Humpty Dumpty reference, and leading up to the opening of the ace arts space in 1980.

Anthony then spelt out his vision for @ColchesterArts to champion new and emerging talent. The importance of online culture was emphasised, with a brilliant explanation of how the modern interweb has helped the centre to build new communities and change the artistic experience.

And then it was time for booze. Except @AnnaJCowen and I took something of a liking to the food first, and didn’t really move away from the buffet table. Some charming conversations followed, and then soon it was chucking out time at The Nottage.

No worries - we stopped off at the Rose and Crown and necked eight pints of Carlsberg each, and were back at base in time for the Ten O’clock News.

Only joking. It was the Eleven O’clock News. Fashionably late, and timing has never been my strong point. Nice nautical hat though.

To the Town Council Offices on Monday evening for the monthly meeting of our friends from Wivenhoe Town Council. I say “friends” in complete sincerity - I don’t see Mr Speaker welcoming people into the Public Gallery at Westminster with a beaming smile and the offer of glacier mint.

Nine of our good Councillor’s were present around the top table on Monday, with a Civic suited, booted and blinged up Mr Mayor chairing the meeting. Three members of the public were also present, which has to be encouraging for local accountability and political access.

Essex County Councillor Julie Young spoke first, updating WTC on her recent work as Colchester’s representative at a county level. Traffic has once again been a priority, with speeding levels around Wivenhoe being a concern for local residents.

Rectory Road keeps on cropping up, along with the approach to Broomgrove School. Cllr Young has asked the police to intervene, whenever local residents raise the issue. A pilot study of the 20′s Plenty initiative has been undertaken. Cllr Young is chasing this up, with a view to rolling it our along the non-residential streets around Wivenhoe.

Keeping with the transport theme, Cllr Young then updated WTC over the issue of a footpath approach to the football club along Elmstead Road. Funding is in place for further investigation, with possible money for the implementation of the project being made available in April.

Those glacier mints then came in handy, when through *shhh* gritted teeth, Cllr Young bigged up Dave’s #bigsociety. Funding for around £50k (not so big then…) may be available for Colchester and Tendring. Individual grants of around £500 to kick-start #hyperlocal community projects within Wivenhoe could be up for grabs.

You call it #bigsociety, we call it Community Initiative - Cllr Young then outlined her track record on delivering with similar schemes locally, pointing out improvements to the skateboard park and new nets for the football pitches at KGV.

Inspiring Ideas is the name of a new initiative from Essex County Council. They like their positive lexicology, these politico types. I would suggest that if you have an idea that isn’t inspiring, then you probably shouldn’t even be thinking in the first place.

The good Cllr Young rightfully pointed out that Wivenhoe is full of inspiring ideas anyway. It is hoped that the countywide scheme will be able to improve communities at a local level.

Good idea, that…

Finally Cllr Young praised the wonderful folk of Wivenhoe Moving Image, and explained how she has helped out the independent community cinema to become a key holder at the Phillip Road Centre, as well as resolving extra access issues to allow increased screenings.

Questions to our council rep followed. WTC Cllr Kraft asked if Cllr Young would like to test out the new toilets that have just been completed at the William Loveless Hall.

Steady the buffers; and the bowels.

Next up on his feet for a bit of political stand up was the ever-entertaining Cllr Steve Ford, the Colchester Borough Council representative for the Quay ward. The good Cllr Ford could appear at a stand up comedy gig, and still raise a smile telling some right ripping yarns all about potholes.

Oh - hang on…

It is the working bain of any local councillor, and yep, potholes are once again particularly heavy on the mind of Cllr Ford. Park Road and “a whooper” (blimey) along Rebow Road have recently been reported by Cllr Ford.

An insider perspective on the 20′s Plenty scheme then followed, with Cllr Ford giving an insight into the chairing an all-party CBC committee. Unlike Cllr Ford, I’ll get straight to the punch line - CBC supports the idea of the scheme throughout the borough, but is looking at funding to carry out a consultation.

Boom boom.

High praise then followed for the Wivenhoe Gilbert and Sullivan Society and their recent performance of Oklahoma! at the William Loveless Hall. Cllr Ford described the production as “fantastic,” in a move which many saw as a possible angling for the warm-up spot next year.

Cllr Ford explained the more serious matter of a recent tricky planning application for the Royal British Legion down at the Quay. This was granted by CBC, allowing much needed improvements to the historic old building, but with strong objections to the current owner of Dickie and Dennis’ old house.

Cllr Ford was pleased to report that a resolution of sorts was achieved, proving that when handled diplomatically, planning can work for the benefit of the community.

New planning laws are about to be introduced. Cllr Ford asked WTC how best to publicise these within the town. Not read the most recent WTC Newsletter, Cllr Ford? Tsk tsk.

With the agenda racing through the chamber with all the speed of the 9:23 passing through Paget Road, we were then back on to WTC matters. The meeting then became slightly clouded for the untrained eyes and ears.

Talk turned towards internal admin matters, relating to communication with a transport officer. It all started off rather innocently, and then somehow the conversation became embroiled with private internal emails, with WTC deciding to debate the issue (whatever the issue was) once the public gallery had been cleared.

Mmm…

Moving on - time for the individual WTC committees to report back. It is only when you witness the scope and responsibilities of the unpaid WTC councillors that you realise how much work and effort goes into the job. No financial reward is on offer, and often little thanks come the way of the councillors.

Cllr Liddy led with Planning. Unfortunately talk once again turned towards updating the Cllr’s behind closed doors, with “legal matters and solicitor letters and meetings” being mentioned.

I have no more to add.

The new health centre is still plodding along with nothing new to report. The meeting heard how internal changes are currently being put in place at the current health centre, suggesting that the professionals involved aren’t planning for a positive outcome any time soon.

Finance and Admin reported back with rare praise from a member of the public in the manner in which WTC is dealing with the harsh reality of a significant cut in local authority funding. Sticking with balancing the books and the Best Value committee stated that Wivenhoe Youth Hub, the May Fair and Wivenhoe in Bloom are all expected to stay within the allocated budget.

Nothing to report on the Working Party and Estates, apart from a request from the wonderfully named Essex Stragglers to use Wivenhoe Wood for a mid-summer event on the evening of the 30th June. I’ve no idea what the Essex Stragglers actually do, but I’d wager that around chucking out time on the 30th June, I could well qualify for membership.

The next agenda item was everyone’s favourite of the Wivenhoe Woodwork Party. Mr Mayor reported that the group has been attending to Ferry Marsh after the recent clean up (yeah, right…)

On to more positive matters and it’s only the Wivenhoe Community Mini Bus - hurrah! In what became something of a surreal discussion, Mr Mayor updated on how the current vehicle serves our needs perfectly. With only 51,000 miles on the clock (that’s a lot of running around Wivenhoe,) the bus is working well with no need for an update.

We then entered into Maureen’s Driving School territory, with a driving test theory style discussion all about parking and avoiding bollards.

Blimey.

The Youth Facilities Working Party reported on the current provision, and how the focus is now turning towards the top of the town and the need to fill any gaps in the services available for our young folk. The ace Youth Council has been invited into the council chamber next week to hold session.

Sticking with the civic responsibility theme, Mr Mayor then replied to that standard Westminster question of asking what the chuffers the leader has been doing since the session last met.

Rather than respond with the jaded “I have been having meetings with my ministerial colleagues,” Mr Mayor proved the point that life in Wivenhoe has a far greater WOW! factor than living in Westminster:

“On Tuesday I visited the Youth Club which is going from strength to strength. I organised and attended the Mayor’s Civic Ball, raising money for the Mayor’s charity. I have witnessed the work being carried out at Broomgrove around Fair Trade. I went to the Colchester Mayor’s Civic event, where I was surrounded by bling. I have met with the bursary fund at the University. I am proud to announce that we will be funding five students next year. I have met with Wivenhoe Helping Hands, I attended the dedication of Major Tom Burt’s memorial and I thoroughly enjoyed Oklahoma!”

Cripes. Somebody pour that man a stiff G & T. Or even offer him another Civic glacier mint.

Meanwhile, Mr Mayor was then on the back foot, offering up an explanation as to why he was seen to be formally opening a botox and teeth whitening clinic.

Sucking in his cheeks, and with his best cheesy grin, Mr Mayor offered up the excellent answer of being offered a £200 gift certificate to auction off at the Mayor’s Charity Ball.

Job’s a good ‘un.

Talk also turned toward Mr Mayor’s alternative ball. For those fearing a mass Goth invasion of the William Loveless Hall with pints of cherry brandy and cider being consumed by men wearing clogs and eyeliner - relax…

The alt ball is for those who perhaps don’t appreciate the formalities of the black tie event. Planning is underway with an esteemed local promoter. I hear *shhh* that the Loveless Hall is being transformed into The Cavern with a 60′s style event being staged.

With no pause even for a quick Twist and Shout, it was soon time for the Town Clerk to report back to WTC. The first spring cutting of the grass has taken place at the KGV and the churchyard. The ladies loos at the Loveless Hall are complete. Budgets are up to date as we approach the end of the financial year.

Mr Mayor emphasised the versatility of our local ground staff, who one day may be mowing the KGV, whilst another they might be called upon the more sombre task of being asked to dig a grave.

It was confirmed that the official opening of the new police station up at the, um, fire station, will take lace on Saturday 26th March. The new building won’t allow access to the public (the old building very rarely had residents turning up anyway…) apart from on the open day itself. Something of a misnomer, but great to be given open access for the launch day.

New Business debate was centred on the request from St Mary’s to organise and stage a Church Ale event in September. This is essentially a medieval style pageant. Planning is required for various road closures, with permission asked to start off the procession from the KGV.

The discussion focussed on the cost of closing the roads, as well as the insurance and safety of the public, with events such as archery being proposed. The ever-helpful Cllr Needham offered clarification, explaining how the weapons were spiked poles, and the professional group involved have their own insurance.

Phew.

Ah, but who will be asked to be the Lord and Lady of the Manor in the procession? Ah, that will fall to the incumbent Mayor or Mayoress, whoever that may be following the impending WTC elections.

Speaking of which - nominations open for anyone wishing to stand as a Wivenhoe Town Councillor on 28th March, with a final deadline of midday on 4th April. It would be cruel to point out that April Fool’s Day also falls within this period…

Papers were shuffled around the table and a few nervy eyes darted back and forth within the chamber. Beware the Ides of March, my good councillors…

[public] meeting closed at 8:40.