To Rectory Road on Thursday evening for the June performance of the Wivenhoe Funny Farm at the Cricket Club. I’ve seen many comedy performances take place out on a cricket square, but never inside a cricket pavilion. I like to think that in a parallel universe, there is an Ashes series being contested within a backstreet comedy club.
The pavilion at Rectory Road is the perfect fit for the Wivenhoe Funny Farm. Arriving fashionably late, @AnnaJCowen and I were guided to our reserved seats (natch) right on the front row.
It wasn’t so much best seats in the house (although they were rather decent) but a seating arrangement that allowed you to count the comedy wrinkle lines underneath the eyelids of each performer.
Many comedians have metaphorically died on stage, and if this was to be the case at the Funny Farm, my front seat position had me well placed to be the undertaker. Or even the assassin.
The atmosphere inside the Funny Farm was lively, but friendly enough so as to not encourage the boozed up comedy heckling bores that have come to characterise the London circuit.
You’ve got be pretty cock sure of yourself to take on a pro. I thought of the perfect riposte to one particular gag, albeit twelve hours later at the start of the working day. The momentum had been lost somewhat.
@HazelFunnyFarm was of course the fine compare for the evening. Taking time out from Wivenhoe Panto script duties / comedy workshops / the general business of paying the bills - Hazel was on fine form.
She needed to be, given that the golden rule of comedy bookings had just been broken: never allow your three comedians to travel in the same car up from London.
Whoops.
With a prompt 8:30 start necessary to keep the show on the road, Hazel took to the stage / darts oche, and opened up the Funny Farm. It was an incredibly brave move, speaking for what could have been five minutes, or equally it could have stretched out to half an hour.
With one eye on the clock and one eye on the front door awaiting the comedy roadshow of the comedians in a car, Hazel effortlessly made light fun of the May Fair (“Tye Die Hard“) the Co-op and poetrywivenhoe.
The joke was on the host for the latter, having just picked up the distinction of a merit award in the poetrywivenhoe annual poetry competition. The first public reading of the anti-poetry piece then took place.
And then just when it looked like this might be an epic effort where one woman keeps the show on the road for a Springsteen style three hour set, the Rectory Road pavilion doors opened and the headcount of comedians quadrupled.
Hurrah!
This was something of a slightly different Funny Farm evening with two joint headliners warming up for their imminent Edinburgh fringe performances.
Juliet Meyers’I’m Not Spartacus show made the transition instantly from out of the back of the car to the front of the stage at the Cricket Club. The raw and slightly chaotic preparation fitted the jokes perfectly.
I’m Not Spartacus addresses themes connected with political apathy, despite an inner will to change the world. It also fitted the Wivenhoe lifestyle rather well.
Some splendid confusion was added to the conclusion, with an audience re-enactment of a Spartacus theme involving a couple of Wivenhoe locals, a strong Yorkshire accent and a sex analogy featuring snails and oysters.
Follow that, Edinburgh.
A quick beer break, and I soon became aware as to why I am a man of blogs, rather than gags. Finding myself at the urinal next to a very senior member of Wivenhoe Town Council, my observation of “so this is where all the big knobs hang out” had the predictable p*** poor reaction.
Whoops.
Now wash your hands.
David Hannant then showcased a short set, reflecting on life in Devon and life in South London. Somewhere in-between the culture clash is probably Wivenhoe.
The final performance for the evening was from Liam Mullone, trying out ideas for his own Down to the Bone Edinburgh show. Social class observations, the history of religion as told through the life cycle of a teenager and condom jokes - all correct and present.
This was a very welcoming Wivenhoe audience, grateful of the time and effort from the performers to come to our town to preview their Edinburgh performances.
Recordings were made for Radio Wivenhoe - I’m rightfully respecting the wishes of the Funny Farm in sending them on to the promoters first, before publishing here.
Plus edits are required for profanity - **** yeah.
The next Funny Farm takes place on 21st July, as ever at the Cricket Club along Rectory Road. For a town that thankfully doesn’t take itself too seriously, there is plenty to laugh about.
To the Town Council Offices on Monday evening for an eve of Solstice pagan sacrifice, aka as a Wivenhoe Town Council monthly meeting. Peace, love and understanding were in the estuary air, and so was a Conservative Borough Councillor.
Cripes.
Suited and booted (me, not the Conservative Borough Councillor) and arriving fashionably late as ever, it was standing room only around the top civic table. I perched my backside strategically on the edge of the Press table, sitting on the fence and waiting to hear all about parking problems and dog pooh.
Eleven fine members of the public were left scrambling for seats for THE hot ticket in town that night. Bell ringing practice in Wivenhoe is on Wednesdays, Comrades.
Joining the Little People was a rare and welcome appearance from LibDem Councillor Manning of the Cross ward, Conservative Councillor Quarrie of the Quay and the ever present, ever smiling Councillor Ford, Labour’s red flag waving #workingforwivenhoe Comrade also from the Quay.
It’s not quite Never the Twain, but the political hot potato that was on everyone’s lips was when the chuffers will the Borough Councillors get it on with the Town Councillors?
Concern has been expressed by the UNPAID Town Councillors that communication with the big boys and girls of the Borough is not flowing quite as frequently as perhaps it should.
With Section 106 wonga floating around in Wivenhoe - a classic you scratch my back brown envelope time - the Town Councillors want to make sure that Borough Councillors are singing from the same St Mary’s Wivenhoe hymn sheet.
“Riches I heed not, nor man’s empty praise,
Thou mine Inheritance, now and always.”
And whilst yer at it, let’s chuck some cash from the Cook’s payback fund on a much needed new zebra crossing outside of the Co-op, Comrades.
It’s a fun filled life being a Borough Councillor. Sacrifices have to be made, and we’re not talking about the Solstice shindig on the muddy banks of the Colne either. Friday night has been put aside as a possible timeslot when Never the Twain will divvy up the local dosh.
Phew, rock ‘n roll.
A bit of local admin, and then we were straight in with Reports from the Borough and County Councillors.
It’s all about accountability, I tell ya…
Councillor Young, Labour’s representative on Essex County Council (seriously) was unavailable, but had kindly submitted a written report:
“New ways of working with Highways should make it easier for 20mph zones to be introduced around both schools in Wivenhoe. I have been in constant dialogue with Tracy Chapman, the Highways advisor on this.”
Sticking with the #workingforwivenhoe Comrades, and Councillor Ford of the Quay was next to address the meeting:
“I called in the planning application for Rectory Hill. I was unhappy with the visibility of the approach, and the drainage. Highways are happy with the visibility, and I have been advised that the drainage concerns are a civil matter.
My concern about the limited parking space was upheld. The developer has hastily added in four extra parking spaces. The planning application has now been passed.”
Up towards the Cross ward and our two LibDem representatives have also been busy with congestion. A rare absence from Councillor Cory (pressing matters on the Policy Panel) but a written submission instead:
“I have been pressing the University about fixing a date for the Clingoe Hill closure ahead of the start of the Knowledge Gateway development. This has now been moved to the start of the summer holidays, to try and limit the congestion. I still expect we will have one - two weeks of aggravation.”
And then some.
Defying the #workingforwivenhoe election period claims that *ahem* “no LibDems are in Wivenhoe,” the Love Me I’m a Liberal lot then had safety in numbers with Councillor Manning of the Cross ward offering up his report to the Town Council:
“I am now sitting on the Planning Committee at Colchester Borough Council. NOTHING will get through.”
Cripes.
“I also have a new notebook to keep track of all the potholes that continue to appear.”
Yeah, and possibly a pitch to become a Glum Councillor as well.
Fine work, though fella.
It’s not quite a case of shuffling the deckchairs on the Titanic, but Conservative Councillor Quarrie of the Quay reported:
“I have been moved off Planning and now sit on Licensing.”
Which must be bad news for the 24/7 nightclub that I had planned for the Quay.
“Parking around the Cook’s development remains a key issue. The road has yet to be adopted by the County Council, which causes problems when we are trying to police it.”
Eight years and counting, my good Councillor…
Also giving cause for concern is the re-routing of the 74 bus route. Peter Kay, the Public Transport Representative explained how First Group, the current franchise operator, has sneakily slipped in a new route, which completely bypasses the town, turning off for Clacton instead.
“How ridiculous,” commented Councillor Kraft. She wasn’t alone in her observations and a polite, but purposeful letter is probably being penned from WTC right now.
The concern is that the move has been poorly advertised. Yoof may catch the bus, expecting a journey into Wivenhoe. With the sudden turn off, they could be out of town and out of funds as they speed off for an impromptu away day at the seaside.
A lengthy conversation then followed about the 20mph zone along the railway bridge at the bottom of the town. I became completely lost; I wasn’t alone.
Speaking in relation to transport matters, Peter Kay then posed the question:
“What does Wivenhoe Town Council propose to do about the annual nonsense that is the Wivenhoe May Fair?”
Cripes.
Awkward.
Having had this curveball thrown at him from across the civic chamber, Mayor Needham composed himself and offered up the reply that the May Fair Committee are working with WTC on future solutions.
Moving on…
Perhaps a bit of Planning to get the party back on track? Former Councillors Liddy and Purdey have been granted special powers (oooh!) to continue the fine work that they have started in representing WTC when it comes to all things Cook’s.
As for that old family favourite of the planned new Wivenhoe Surgery? Councillor Lodge updated with news that the deal is “far from dead.” The PCT has put the plan to the Doctor’s at the old surgery to see if they want to move forward.
Having a pre-defined national NHS policy as a framework in which to make these decisions would be nice.
Hey hoe.
In WTC Personnel news - THIS JUST IN: New litter picker James has impressed so much that he has been awarded a permanent position after the successful completion of his trial.
Hurrah!
Handling the aftermath of May Fair must have been a stern test, and one that James handled magnificently.
Onto the best bit - the Best Value Committee (aka secretly as the pre-WTC prepping meet where the real Council business is decided - behind closes doors - or so the suggestion has been made to me…)
Anyone been to Stanway of late? Apart from offering up a most splendid jazz club, my knowledge of our Colchester near neighbours is somewhat limited. This is all about to change, with WTC proposing to adopt the Stanway system of committees for local governance. The buggers better have the ACE Working Woods Party.
Back to Wivenhoe however, and in a turkeys voting for Christmas move, WTC agreed unanimously to foot the bill to pay for Mayoral badges for ex-Mayor’s.
Mmm…
It’s a badge of honour, and probably on balance one that is a worthy memento for the UNPAID work of Wivenhoe Town Councillors during their hectic year of civil service.
A slight shuffle along the press bench, and it was here that I made my strategic switch to *shhh* the Conservative hot seat.
Cripes.
All the best parties finally kick into action as the night closes in, and as the public chamber emptied and m’Conservative friend departed to ponder why Wivenhoe still hasn’t got a new surgery under the inspiring leadership of the Coalition, I played musical chairs.
Mr Mayor updated WTC about his activities, in what has been a very busy first month in office:
“I have attended sixteen formal events in the past month. The highlights included visiting Wivenhoe Youth Hub [ditto] the parade of the 16 Air Assault Brigade through Colchester, the opening of the *shhh* Quiet Garden at Broomgove Shcool and the Helping Hands AGM.”
Pleased to report that Helping Hands appears to be in sound financial hands, thanks to some very generous donations locally.
Five points then came out of the Community Safety feedback:
(i) Inconsiderate parking remains an issue (even though WTC, after taking police advice, decided not to implement a considerate parking scheme within the town…)
(ii) The local crime figures are low. A slight increase in burglary however has been recorded. The police have suggested that this is possibly a local gang, with laptops and TV’s being the main items going missing.
(iii) Traffic routes to Cook’s Shipyard have deviated.
Eh?
It appears that companies that don’t take the designated route down Valley Road are in danger of losing their contracts. Keep yer eyes peeled around *cough* Queens Road, Comrades.
(iv) Ball games by the Medway are showing some signs for concerns. Elder kids are getting slightly enthusiastic, with the balls entering into the road.
(v) And finally Speed Watch - this is now being rolled out during the school run hours, with a focus upon Bobbitt’s Way and Elmstead Road.
A brief break for the passing around the chamber of the official civic spearmints (receipts available for inspection on request) and then whaddya know - apt timing and Finance.
Quotes are being sourced for a possible asbestos survey for the William Loveless Hall toilets. It’s a dirty job, but someone’s got to do it, etc.
In Correspondence news and an appeal for support from WTC for the emerging Radio Wivenhoe group has been received. This is not necessarily financial, but an endorsement.
Granted, with Mr Mayor proudly declaring:
“This is a positive feature for Wivenhoe. It is an aid for further communication and helps to promote the town. We earnestly support Radio Wivenhoe.”
Splendid.
Someone should sign that man up for a guest spot on Wiv Chat.
Oh, hang on…
A rallying call then went out for players to take part in the annual Town Cricket Match on the evening of 13th July at Rectory Road. The official civic quotation that came out on the evening is:
“WE WANT TO WACK THEM.”
Cripes.
Any Other Business?
With the Ten Acres development looking likely to start soon, a new access road will be in place within Wivenhoe. Peter Hill has formally suggested naming this in memory of Dr Ted Palmer.
Plus no WTC meeting can be complete without the perennial Engine Shed rumour.
HONK!!!!
Massive rumour alert: minuted, but not necessarily economical with the truth, the continual pub gossip of the old Engine Shed being bought up by a developer wrapped up the meeting.
Any views?
A stunned silence filled the chamber.
Time for that pagan sacrifice in the Network Rail car park, Comrades?
A weekend downpour of Biblical proportions, which can only mean that it’s time for the summer publication of Wivenhoe News.
Blimey.
Sea Defences Saga Flows On is the lead story.
See what they’ve done there?
“There has been much anger and dismay caused by the stripping of vegetation from the seawalls in Wivenhoe alongside our tidal river, both downstream and upstream from the flood barrier.”
The bad science justification that was bungled out by the Environment Agency is also re-published, as is a very kind plug for *cough* the Wivenhoe Forum thread.
What’s new here is the offer by the Natural England - the spineless body that rubber stamped the destruction - to re-plant 5,000 “compensatory trees” - you break our legs and we say thank you when you offer us crutches.
Eight hundred and fifty have been put aside for the North Essex estuary. Don’t go getting your digging spades out just yet, Comrades:
“In the Colne Estuary they [Natural England] have provided 850 small tress to Brightlingsea Town Council for a site to the east of the town.”
If you stand at White House Beach on a clear estuary morning, and then squint out over the water with one eye closed, you may just be able to see the benefits of the trees bestowed upon our beloved Brothers in Brightlingsea.
Cheers.
No worries. What we need is a smiling picture of a lovely local lady to add some cheer to the sea defence doom:
“Workers of Wivenhoe - Shelia Scammell, Lollipop Lady.”
Lovely.
Wivenhoe May Fair 2011 gets the p.2 treatment, in something of an after the Lord Mayor’s Show airing. Time to move on, time to plan and time to restore May Fair as a community event for 2012.
Speaking of Mayor’s, Cllr Sinclair is captured in one of his final acts of civic duty in what has been a busy year. The Guide’s Wedding Party is all part of wearing the Wivenhoe civic chains.
But it’s not all about the Brownies or Girl Guides. On a more serious note, there is a plea on p.2 for a new Scout Leader for Wivenhoe:
“Let’s not beat about the bush: twenty youngsters, full of energy and enthusiasm [and then some] raring to take up the opportunity offered by the Scouting movement.”
This is a BIG role that really needs filling. The Wivenhoe News editorial on p.3 plays with similar themes:
“Off the Rails seems to be looking for pretty much a whole new team, the Wivenhoe Society is limping along with no Secretary and a very small committee, the WEA has been without a Chair for a year and is about to lose its Secretary.
One of the things that you often here in praise of Wivenhoe is ‘there’s so much going on here.’ Well folks - things only happen because people organise them.”
Wise word, but maybe it is a reflection of the work / life balance? There are only so many hours in the day and bills still need to be paid. It’s no secret that I have had to severely cut back on my out of hour’s unpaid activity of late.
On a more lighter note and any news article that contains the phrase: “superb French folk music, played on hurdy-gurdies [geddin there!] and bagpipes” has to be a winner. The Town Meets Gown event gets a mention on p.3.
Dr Philippa Hawley and Halcyon Palmer pen a simply superb local historical account on the various Wivenhoe surgeries dating back over the past Century. It is apt timing, what with the STOP / START / STOP farce of the new Wivenhoe surgery by the Fire Station continuing to stall.
I’m not going to re-publish any of the copy here - this article is worthy of your purchase of Wivenhoe News alone. More of the same please.
The Two Ronnies of Wivenhoe local politics, Cyril Liddy and Dave Purdey, are given the It’s Goodbye From Me, and It’s Goodbye From Him headline.
With sixteen and eight years respectively serving as unpaid Town Councillors, both Cyril and Dave are rightfully given a short column to say a fond farewell.
Of sorts…
Along with Sheila Scammell and her lovely Lollipop Lady tales on p.8, Alison Kent also carries an ACE interview with Ray the Rubbish, the retiring litter picker of Wivenhoe:
“I think you should try to keep the front of your property clean, like the old days. Have pride in where you live.”
Hear, hear.
I didn’t realise that the job was only fourteen hours a week - Ray has seemed to be ever-present during my short stay here. Good luck to James, Ray’s replacement.
Aquatic matters are the concern on p.11. Lifeboat Week gets a deserved plug, as does the Wivenhoe branch of the Royal British Legion:
“Remembrance is a very large part of the Legion’s ethos. Those who attend the Legion Wednesday evenings will know that those who have given their lives in Afghanistan and other places in the service of their nation are individually remembered.”
The building fund for the Legion has been boosted by a donation of over £2,000 from the Boxing Day walk staged by WORC. £690 was also raised at the ACE fireworks display. October 29th is already in the calendar for one of the best nights that Wivenhoe is able to offer.
Next door but one at The Nottage and there is a plug for Water Marks - the Summer Exhibition, featuring local artists Alison Stockmarr, Barbara Peirson and Pru Green.
The exhibition is open on Sundays from 2pm - 5pm until 11th September, and on Regatta Day on 23rd July. It is VERY good. There’s a blog post already being lined up…
Speaking of the Regatta, Wivenhoe News reports:
“There will be the usual wacky races and about thirty stalls and a brass band. The pram race will take place on 22nd July.”
Wivenhoe Youth Hub continues to grow and develop new ideas and partnerships. Page 12 updates with reports on the gig at the Philip Road Centre by local band Rising Soul, a go-karting event organised with Brightlingsea’s 4Youth (reckon we got the better name…) as well as the ACEarchery and rowing evening.
What is rather humbling about The Hub is that those involved offer so much more back into the community. There was a considerable presence at the WivSoc riverbank clean up, help offered at May Fair, as well as support for the Crabbing Competition next month down by the Quay.
Likewise good news coming out of the ADP Theatre School:
“Angie Diggens has booked the Colchester Charter Hall for a show with her Wivenhoe students, combining the best of her last two shows at Clacton.”
Saturday 25th June at 7:30pm, £12 a ticket, details on 282020.
Helen Chambers writes a review of the Gilbert and Sullivan Society production of Oklahoma! at the Loveless Hall:
“The singing was faultless, the whole cast strong and talented.”
And keeping with the Wivenhoe artistic feel, Andy Brooke writes a well-deserved homage to Moving Image:
“It’s great to see people you know in the audience and have a genuine community atmosphere, rather than renting a DVD at home.”
Further details of the Moving Image summer schedule are up on m’blog over here.
The rock ‘n roll rollicking rollercoaster ride that is Radio Wivenhoe (blimey) get a plug on p.14, as does a call for “journalists, bloggers and poets” for Off the Rails. The Wivenhoe Poetry Prize looks forward to the 2011 results as part of the poetrywivenhoe evening at The Greyhound on the 23rd June. Meanwhile a new University of the Third Age art group is starting at the Loveless Hall on 14th September.
All ‘appening - all ‘appening I tell ya.
The good folk of Wivenhoe Bookshop have an entire page to plug future activity, such is the depth of the programme that is on offer. Too much to condense into a throwaway blog paragraph - my suggestion would be to head to the Bookshop for a perusal and a polite chat.
Open Gardens on p.16 is caught between the publishing deadline and the sheer splendour that was the most splendid event this spring. It remains the highlight to date of My Year in Wivenhoe - wonderful, wonderful community spirit and pleasure.
Keeping it green fingered and Wivenhoe Bloom explain a little more about the brilliant use of dead space on the Wivenhoe Triangle that is overlooked by the Co-op, the opticians and Jardine:
“The site belongs to Highways - it’s classed as a verge - but WTC has a licence to plant. Jardine has contributed a very generous donation of £250 towards the cost of materials and plants.”
I have no shame in plugging local businesses that put something back into the community. An excellent gesture and kind contribution, Cristian. Jolly good work, Jardine.
The Parish Paths Partnership column penned by Helen Evans on p.16 puffs out a huge PHEW after finding out that Essex County Council continues to support the hyperlocal initiative.
Three Wivenhoe rights of way have been worked on by P3 to day: the side of Broomgrove Schools, the back of the houses in Broome Grove and the path along the top of the sea wall - you might have already heard about the latter…
So successful is the Wivenhoe P3 project that the group has now become a roving project. It is the A-Team of parish paths partnerships. If you have a problem with some overgrown bramble around the North Essex estuary, this crack team of cleaners should be first on your To Call list.
Cripes.
The joyous news coming out of p.17 and the WAGA update is:
“Spring is finally here.”
Hurrah!
Mayor Needham (woh!) explains more about the recent Beating the Bounds walk around Wivenhoe:
“The tradition of beating the bounds came from a time when no one, except the rich, could leave the parish without permission. It was a method of ensuring that local youngsters knew the limits of their parish.
It involved choir boys, the Parish Clerk and clergymen, leaving from the church armed with wands or sticks.”
Splendid. Soft lot, nowadays. The tradition was restored on 5th June this year. No young child was hurt in reviving this most excellent local tradition.
Wivenhoe bird watcher supreme Richard Allen explains very helpfully the difference between swifts, swallows and martins on p.18. Recent local sightings include:
“Nightingales have arrived in good numbers with a particularly vocal bird near the railway underpass along the Trail. Butterflies have enjoyed the good early weather.”
The ever-observant @AnnaJCowen (blimey) has also spotted a Jay along the Trail.
It all gets rather saucy at the foot of p.18 with Spoons, Spurtles and Spatulas.
Oh Lordy.
“Members of the Wivenhoe Woods Working Party recently attended a day’s course in green woodworking. Instruction was given on how to turn wood on a pole lathe and make spoons and other utensils using knives and a shave horse.”
Phew.
A Personal View of Transition Town Wivenhoe by the good Bob Mehew on p.19:
“I considered Wivenhoe a good place for a Transition Town: strong community spirit; a great awareness of climate change, environmental and sustainability issues; a willingness to get involved, to learn, to educate, to participate.”
TTW continues to grow and innovate. Wivenhoe is all the better for it.
The Wivenhoe Townscape Forum (*not* the Wivenhoe Forum…) gets a deserved article on p. 19:
“There is much in Wivenhoe of historic interest. There are 73 buildings in the town which are included in the English Heritage list of buildings of national interest.
The local list of historic assets is being carried out with the support of WTC and WivSoc, in order to list some of the best historical features of Wivenhoe which have not yet been recognised so that they do not become forgotten in the huge amount of new building and development.”
Bill Ellis writes a brilliant personal account of life at Cook’s Shipyard when the order books were full, with comparisons of the modern day site. Photos of the new jetty accompany this on p.22.
We return to the seawall clearance on p.24 with Peter Kennedy, the esteemed Editor of Wivenhoe News, explaining the depth of debate that this has delivered:
“We have received many pages of emails and submissions, and I shall attempt some sort of overview.”
A summary of comments and complaints follow. The consensus is that the Environment Agency has been crap at communication.
Fine work then from Wivenhoe News, which has put some direct Q’s to the EA, and received some rather direct answers:
“Q: Were any badgers found during the Wivenhoe work?
A: No - there were no badgers found for the Wivenhoe work.
Q: Are any of the proposed sites for compensatory replanting located in the Wivenhoe area?
A: No. Wivenhoe Marsh has found to be unsuitable.”
That’s what happens when you rip the entire natural habitat out, fellas.
Whoops.
The Surgery Saga Grinds On is the p.25 message from Bernard Jenkin, MP. Nothing to do with your national coalition NHS policy, I trust, Sir?
To be fair to the MP for Harwich and North Essex, our Conservative colleague airs a sense of frustration over the continued delay:
“The Government’s decision to review its health legislation raises the immediate concern that the new Wivenhoe GP surgery will be beset by even more uncertainty. There is no case for this. There is no excuse for further delays, and I have made this clear to the CE of the PCT.”
Speaking of the impact of coalition policies on a hyperlocal level, p.26 explains more about the £9k (!!!!) tuition fees that @Uni_of_Essex proposes to introduce.
Some PR fluff from the University is then re-printed. Twenty-one summers ago and I was fishing around for a University place. £9k (or the inflationary equivalent) would have put me off considerably. I wouldn’t have heard of Wivenhoe. I wouldn’t have moved here.
Oh how fickle is the Invisible Hand that pushes and prongs us through the life’s great adventures.
Blimey.
Town and Gown fiscal relations are restored with news of the £2,200 raised at November’s dinner at the Nottage, and now handed over as a bursary to five grateful local Wivenhoe students.
Broomgrove Infants updates on p.28 with reports of the Royal Wedding celebrations; Broomgrove Juniors explain more about the Outside / In project with Slack Space in Colchester.
Celebrations also at Millfields - a fond farewell to Angela Eglington after twenty-five years of teaching, as well as the school’s very own 30th birthday.
WivSoc rightfully reflects on the success of the riverbank clean up, with seventy volunteers stepping forward to help clean up the Colne. The sad winding up of the Wivenhoe Youth Theatre is lamented, with more positive news coming from the Colne School Choir’s recent performance in Wivenhoe.
Councillor Sinclair reflects upon his past year of civic service wearing the gold chain on p.30:
“I would have like to have seen a healthy election this year as we are entitled to 13 Councillors. Sadly there were only eleven candidates, hence no WTC election.”
Plus:
“A planning application has been lodged to demolish the St John Ambulance Hall for replacement with a privately owned project. I am part of a project to save the building. A group of people have come together, with funds, to keep it as a usable community facility.”
Mayor Needham writes on p.30 about the challenges that lay ahead for his administration:
“The proposed medical centre, a future for the former police station; reaching a satisfactory conclusion to the planning gains associated with the Cook’s Yard development and keeping an eye on the gains that maybe derived from any further development.”
The local politicos were caught cold ahead of publication deadlines. Columns from Essex County Councillor Julie Young, Colchester Borough Councillors Steve Ford and Mark Cory, were all penned before the re-election of the latter two.
Great fun to watch from the sidelines, mind.
On the sporting front and Wivenhoe Tennis Club has a call for new members; Andrew Nightingale, the Chair of the Wivenhoe and District Sporting Facilities Trust is also asking for help - financial help - for Broad Lane. Anymore updates on the mystery Mr X and his millions?
And to finish on some hyperlocal happiness - Wivenhoe Helping Hands publishes a rather humble piece, explaining more about the volunteer work of this organisation and how it is genuinely helping folk around the town.
Wivenhoe News is sold at the Co-op, Crossways, the Post Office, Bryans Newsagents and the lovely Wivenhoe Bookshop.
And so on the one day when the weather wasn’t blooming in Wivenhoe, Wivenhoe in Bloom decided to attend to the new bedding patch outside of Wivenhoe Eyecare.
Bloomin ‘eck, etc.
Having hoped that a new political stump was to be positioned on the triangular patch of land that covers the Co-op, Wivenhoe Eyecare and Jardine, instead we now have a raised gravel garden with plenty of herbaceous plants.
A political stump has limited opportunities anyway. You wouldn’t want to go round sniffing any local politicians that try and preach from the patch. There is potential for ‘watering’ them, however…
As assumed (NEVER assume) those lovely folk from Wivenhoe in Bloom have been responsible for this fantastic transformation of the previous barren patch of land.
Work started early on Wednesday morning. By the time I had got my act together and buggered off to the Co-op for some milk, all hopes of door stepping the Bloomers for some @audioboo action were long gone. The early bird catches Wivenehoe in Bloom, etc.
With Mediterranean growing conditions blessing these estuary wilds of late, expect the herbaceous borders to, um, bloom. Plenty of watering will be required, but I get the feeling that the kind folk at Wivenhoe Eyecare are going to be caring a little bit extra more over the coming weeks.
I’m sure there’s a #bigsociety grant up for grabs somewhere, but one man’s watering can is another man’s attempt to hijack genuine community spirit for overt political purposes.
Meanwhile, Wivenhoe in Bloom will once again have a stall at the May Fair this year. Over £300 was raised through plant sales in 2010, allowing the group to continue to work on projects such as the patch of land outside the opticians.
If all of this herbaceous activity has inspired you to go public with your own Wivenhoe garden, here’s a polite reminder that the Open Gardens season is almost upon us.
Taking place over the weekend of 21st - 22nd May, twenty-eight local folk are kindly opening up their gardens for all to see this year, all for the very modest cost of only £4. Tickets are available now from Wivenhoe Bookshop, Bryans Newsagents, Rollos Estates and Crossways Stores at The Cross.
To The Nottage once again on Wednesday evening for a committee meeting with the lovely WivSoc folk. With the smell of yacht varnish in the barn below being mixed up with the aroma of booze from the Rose and Crown along the Quay, this was something of a Wivenhoe moment.
There is always a sense of great history in entering the Nottage. You feel that you are truly experiencing something of Wivenhoe’s past - and hopefully the future, with WivSoc pushing forward a positive agenda for the town.
Of course you could always replicate the experience by brewing yacht beer and drinking it in your garden shed on a Wednesday evening once a month. But that would mean that you would miss the WivSoc stories. These blog posts don’t write themselves, y’know…
As ever, a varied agenda of the serious and trivial was in store. Off the Rails was up first. A request for assistance has been made by the local arts groups that is responsible for putting in place public art at Wivenhoe Station.
Off the Rails has been officially adopted by Network Rail as the organisation in which to promote art along the platforms. The potential problem is that Off the Rails may be ace at art, but has little experience of organising. WivSoc has been asked for advice.
Although not really coming under the WivSoc remit, it was agreed that conversations with Off the Rails should continue, with a view to helping the group become more self-sufficient. Another suggestion was to steer Off the Rails with the recent moves to re-start the legendary Wivenhoe Arts Club.
I’m not quite sure how this happened, but the debate then somehow let drop that the Station Master’s House has had something of a roof falling in on the world moment: THE ROOF REALLY HAS FALLEN IN, apparently, with the first floor coming crashing down.
Whoops.
Exactly where this leaves the fine Transition Town Wivenhoe and the ambitious (and ace) plans to turn the building into a sustainable community centre remains to be seen. TTW has a war chest of community goodwill, but sadly not a blank cheque to re-build Wivenhoe.
Sticking with matters fiscal, and it seems that WivSoc has saved the UK economy.
Cripes.
Recent changes in tax and insurance law means that the Chancellor has been presented with an extra £3.10 to help reduce the deficit.
We’re all in this together, Comrades.
Planning looked at the proposed development of nine new properties along Rectory Road. I still don’t quite get this ‘development’ terminology; it seems to suggest moving forward, an advancement, a development, if you will. But what if the development [urgh] is actually a step back?
They usually are…
Record Road has been previously submitted, and then withdrawn. It is now back in the hands of Colchester Borough Council. WivSoc has no formal objection, apart from a passing comment on the access road planned. A letter is being drawn up to put this point across. Town planning speak for re-wording of the phrase “jolly nasty design” were then discussed.
It is at this stage in the development (aha!) that it is perhaps worth reminding folk of the recent changes in the CBC planning application process. New applications will by-pass the Committee and go straight to council officers, UNLESS two formal objections are made. These need to be put in place through your local CBC ward councillor.
A hop, skip and a jump down Rectory Road, via an afternoon bender at the Rose and Crown (steady) and we’re at Cook’s. We’re also at the point that no WivSoc committee meeting would be complete without: the development [urgh, urgh] of the old shipyard.
A diligent spot on the CBC database by our esteemed Queen of Planning, and it seems that a variance in use has been put forward for the commercial developments along from the Quay.
The units were originally intended for commercial use for home workers as a business unit. The suggestion now is that they will be able to open up on Sundays and Bank Holidays, and also have the option to serve refreshments outdoors.
With On the Corner (nee the Corner House) now focussing on the evening economy, having one more place to purchase coffee in Wivenhoe during the daytime has to be seen as something worth welcoming.
Keeping with the public space theme, it seems that the old St John’s Ambulance building has become embroiled in a bit of a local tug of law. Time to repeat my personal mantra of not commenting in public on private planning applications. Still holding out for that nightclub at the bottom of the garden…
With Moving Image finding funding problems for the long-term purchase of the building, a local artist is interested in taking over St John’s for studio space. This includes the possibility of opening up for exhibitions.
*Some* members of Wivenhoe Town Council though are unhappy with this move. They see the building as one of the few remaining possibilities to keep it as a shared community resource. Booking a public venue in Wivenhoe is becoming increasingly difficult. *Some* members of WTC would like to keep all options open.
I wouldn’t stretch it out as far as calling it a rival bid, but a second group is in the running to try and restore the building for community use. A figure of £25,000 has been quoted to carry out repairs. It appears that the second group already has this capital.
I’m not ruling out a *ahem* THIRD bid, should my application for the nightclub in the back garden be turned down.
Keeping it social and the WivSoc is genuinely overjoyed with the tremendous success of the recent riverbank clean up. This was the most successful yet, with 80 volunteers turning up on a Sunday morning to help make the Colne a little bit cleaner.
The results are there to see - a tidal litter free stretch, all the way down to the Hythe. WivSoc was particularly happy to see young volunteers from the Hub and the Scouts and Guides coming out to help.
Cleaning up the Colne has become something of uniting community issue (or maybe not…) with some lovely plans to stretch out across the other side and involve our friends from Rowhedge.
It has been suggested that WivSoc twins future clean ups with the Rowhedge lot. We can even wave to one another from the other side. I know which half of the great divide I’d wager has the greater amount of mess to clean up.
Other social news includes a welcome return of the WivSoc wine tasting evening, taking place this year on the 18th November at the Congregational Hall. Our friends from the Co-op are once again very kindly providing the booze.
Chin chin.
But try and keep it sober - here comes that nice Mr Mayor with his formal report from the recent WTC meeting. I say formal, but the Dress Down Wednesday and affable approach of our civic leader, kept it all rather light-hearted.
A fair few serious issues however:
The proposed new Health Centre behind the Fire Station has seen considerable movement in recent weeks. As previously reported, Mr Mayor has held a meeting with the PCT, leaving Councillor Sinclair:
“More positive than at any stage before.”
Basically the PTC wants a decision imminently, ahead of the proposed national government shake-up of the NHS. A meeting of the Executive is being held next month, where a final decision is expected to be made.
Mr Mayor reported that the site itself is now ready for construction. The last remaining planning hurdle (a stray tree root) has now been resolved. Slight cynicism though from some sections of WivSoc, with mumblings of we’ve been here before…
Mr Mayor then spoke of his personal quest to:
“Bang a few heads together to try and get some co-operation from our local councillors.”
Cripes.
Not in the literal sense of course, but with currently two LibDems, One Tory and one Labour councillor, Mr Mayor is concerned that possible Section 106 funds coming out of the Knowledge Gateway might get lost in the political fog of tribal party politics.
The Cross ward has been singled out as being in most urgent need of new funds. A hit list of possible projects has been drawn up by WTC. I’d personally like to see a tag team-wrestling contest featuring all four councillors.
“Most town councillors are on board with the concept. There is a feeling that this is a one-off opportunity to keep these under public use. We dare not let go of them.”
The police apparently quoted a figure of £400,000 four years ago, although WTC holds strong that this was never put forward in writing. It is expected that a similar figure will remain the market value today.
Which is slightly steep for a local town council that has just had a significant funding cut from the paymasters of CBC. The plan is to approach the Municipal Loan Board, and then rent out the properties to service the loan.
We finished off with My Mayor updating on the #hyperlocal political process:
“We have four new councillors, and four retiring councillors - which leaves us two short of our quota. I would have LOVED for this to have gone to election - it would have done WTC a world of good.”
I still reckon mud wrestling is the way to go, Comrades.
See ya next month…
Wivsoc - Disclaimer: I am a member of the Wivenhoe Society, although not a committee member. All views expressed within this blog post are mine alone, and not that of the committee, or the Society in general.
To the Town Council Office on Monday evening for the final meeting of Wivenhoe Town Council - nope, we’re not about to surrender citizenship to the impending city status of Colchester - there’s some serious spunk inside the folk of Wivenhoe, and then some, Comrades…
But with the ballot box looming (or not…) then this was the final farewell for the current administration. It was to be a meeting where the words “emotional“, “cowslips” and “bottoms” would all appear in the official minutes.
Blimey.
Chomping at the bit and ready for the off (and the electoral door knocking) was LibDem Councillor Cory, representing the folk of Wivenhoe Cross at Colchester Borough Council. The good councillor had very kindly given up his evening of ear bending to update WTC with recent #hyperlocal matters around his patch.
“Dog fouling behind Chainee Road has been a problem. Wivenhoe Town Council helped to re-surface this recently. Sadly some dog walkers are not so respectful.”
Rather than finger point, I rather like Cllr Cory’s approach in accentuating the positives here:
“The solution has been to approach the nearby Broomgrove School and ask if the children would like to help to make No Dog Fouling signs to put up.”
Alternatively I feel duty bound to remind you that the charming Pet Shop Girls down at Wivenhoe Pets supply dog poop bags.
Other Cross issues from Cllr Cory included drainage problems around Broomgrove (sorted) potholes (reported) and the possibility of introducing streetlights at the Elmstead Road / Brightlingsea Road junction by the football club.
A cheeky grin and a smile towards the top table, and then the good councillor reminded WTC that he was up for re-election, and he hoped to continue the pothole and dog pooh conversation next month.
Safety in numbers, etc and so next up it was fellow LibDem colleague Councillor Manning, also of the Cross, also providing an update.
“I’ll keep this very short - I have been making sure that residents in my ward have enough black bin liners.”
Bravo.
One would hope that there is a little more meat on the bone, so to speak, in some of the election literature heading our way over the coming weeks
Peter Kay, the Public Transport Representative, then filed his report. There is the possibility of the 61 and 62 bus timetable changing in the afternoons from September through until the end of winter. This is to take into account increased public transport use during this period.
Speeding through the agenda faster than a juggernaut down Valley Road (steady) and next we were on to Planning. The lease issue continues to dominate the ongoing Cook’s Shipyard business. Progress is slow.
Something slightly more positive however when it comes to the much delayed new Health Centre for Wivenhoe. Mr Mayor updated WTC that he has held a meeting with the PCT this week, amid growing concerns that national government NHS policy changes may have a serious impact on the future of health provision in Wivenhoe - all in a non-party political sense, of course.
The outcome is something extremely positive:
“We are gathering momentum over this issue. After much delay over this project, we are hopeful of having a definitive answer in May. All is not lost and it even looks rather positive.”
That’s something to tell the electorate on the doorstep, and with immaculate timing, it was back to the day job, and back to the door knocking from our good LibDem Councillor friends.
Um, good luck with that one, fellas.
The Personnel Committee confirmed that Ray, Wivenhoe’s Litter Picker Supreme, has now formally retired. A much-deserved formal presentation will take place at the Annual Town Meeting next month.
Meanwhile, we have a replacement in James, who has already been busy going about his business. Mr Mayor is extremely happy with the appointment, and encouraged that we weren’t short on applicants for the post.
A lengthy debate then followed all about the Best Value Committee. This *isn’t* about umm-ing and ahh-ing over the price of a Pot Noodle at the Co-op, but as the name suggests, how WTC can make the most of the little dosh that comes our way.
As ever, I became slightly lost in the finer detail. The allocation of Section 106 funding was at the core, and with perfect time, Colchester Borough Council is about to introduce some training in how to understand 106 arrangements.
Sign me up now, Comrades.
But back to the finer mechanics of Best Value. The discussion continued, with great debate about definitions within the WTC constitution. Words such as “emotion” were erased, and “code of conduct” inserted instead. There was even an on the record “bloody hell!” moment, but one wouldn’t expect to see this appear within the WTC letter of the law.
You say tomatoe, I say tomato, etc. Actually, I say can we move on please?
Bloody hell, etc.
Never one to stick to the formalities of the agenda (and hurrah for that,) and a fashionably late appearance from the good Councillor Steve Ford, Labour’s representative in the Quay ward, then lit up the Council chamber.
Councillor Ford played it cool, not wanting to talk about potholes and dog pooh, but simply taking the time out from the election stump to thank and praise the work of the retiring Wivenhoe Town Concillors.
Some very honest and humble words were spoken about Councillors Iacovou, Fox and Liddy, the latter of which is stepping down from UNPAID civic service after sixteen years in the chamber.
Working Party Reports then followed. Any party that involves work is usually one that I would give a wide berth - a bit like the Wivenhoe Community Mini Bus, which has been experiencing a few navigational malfunctions with some drivers. Rest easy, Comrades - the verges causing the minor traffic woes have now been trimmed.
Speaking of minor gardening mishaps, Mr Mayor reported that an official complaint has been received by a resident about the premature cutting of the cowslips in the cemetery, before they had the chance to bloom. You may smirk, my friends, but such issues have been known to bring down governments.
The Wivenhoe Wood Working Party (or www.p for the cool kids by the Co-op) extended an open invite for any local folk who want to find out what the WTC group with the BEST name actually gets up to. There is an Open Day on 15th May, meeting by the picnic benches in the wood.
www.p <3 lol, as we like to say wit da yoof.
Speaking of which, the Youth Facilities Working Party perhaps provided the most controversial moment of the meeting. It is a sign of the economic times when WTC is considering future funding arrangements for the ACEHub down at the Philip Road Centre.
No need to run for office on a Yoof ticket just yet - simply that WTC would like to see the balance books of the group, ahead of awarding a further £1,000 annual contribution to help support the Hub.
It makes economic, if not social sense. The overall aim of the Hub is to be self-sufficient. The initial grant was just that - a means to an end. It now seems that the end may be closer than was first thought. One to watch for the budget review in the autumn…
Members’ Individual Reports included a humble, honest and glowing tribute from Mr Mayor towards the three councillors that are stepping down. Mr Mayor also updated the meeting with his civic engagements over the last month - EIGHT events have been attended by the nice man with the bling. That’s an awful lot of Mr Sheen to account for in the town budget.
I believe the children are our future, treat them well and let them lead the way, etc… Mr Mayor highlighted the recent Colne Fusion concert at the Congregational Hall, the Youth Council visit to the chamber and a visit to the nature garden at Broomgrove as his personal best bits from the past month.
Community Safety and Police Matters (replacing the old Neighborhood Watch Scheme) offered feedback on the recent move of our local police team to the fire station. There is slight concern about contact details. A mobile number is available (07966 197245) as well as a non-emergency contact line on 0300 333 4444. WTC resolved to help publicise these more.
As for the recent NAP meeting? I refer my honourable colleagues to the blog post blah blah blah…
The good Town Clerk reported on the town council business of one burial grant being approved, the second grass cutting in the cemetery (watch out for those cowslips - whoops) and the brilliant news that the bumblebee springer in the KGV has been given a new head.
Blimey.
“Caution needs to be exercised” when it comes to Finance. There is a “substantial surplus” in the WTC coffers, with a recommendation to re-assess the budgets that were cut at the start of the financial year. £3,000 will soon be needed for urgent chapel repairs; a matching figure is being put aside as an emergency legal fighting fund. Presumably the two aren’t linked.
Letters of Correspondence to WTC included a rather sad update that the Wivenhoe Youth Theatre has been wound up. After sixteen years of working with young folk around the town, recruitment has become something of a problem.
It’s not that Wivenhoe is short on young theatrical talent - witness the booming ADP Theatre, and the fine talent on show in the Pantomime - it is simply that many other local groups now offer a similar service.
Mr Mayor personally pledged to write a letter of thanks to those involved in keeping the Youth Theatre running, and congratulating them on what has been achieved within the town.
A notice of the Annual Town Meeting was formally read out. Wednesday 11th May in the Loveless Hall is THE social event of the year. Or something. It certainly is for Mr Mayor, who came as close as is constitutionally possible in asking for a cross party whip. Shirt and ties would be nice as well.
Highways confirmed that the 20mph speed limit for lower Wivenhoe would be formally adopted by Essex County Council on 25th July. A new bus shelter is now in place outside Cedric’s. Civic pride was taken in announcing that it can “accommodate four bottoms.” That all depends on the size of bottom, surely…
Never mind the length, feel the thickness.
Which in a round about way brings us back to the final meeting of this administration. WTC is a few sandwiches short of a picnic hamper - only eleven names have stepped forward for civic duty, leaving two co-opted vacancies.
The role of a Town Councillor is unpaid, but you do get to enjoy the civic bowl of sweets that is passed around the chamber once a month.
The good news story coming out of the Philip Road Centre is that Moving Image, the independent community cinema for Wivenhoe, is now a key holder. When it comes to local government and policy twonk type talk, terms like key holder and stakeholder etc are often part of the garbled Third Way of working.
Not so here in Wivenhoe - Moving Image is a key holder; the group physically holds a key for the Philip Road Centre.
Hurrah!
This should make the setting up and transformation of the centre into a state of the art cinematic experience (steady) a lot smoother on film nights. A spring and summer programme is currently being put together.
But it’s not all about lower Wivenhoe for Moving Image. The programme of parallel screenings up amongst the splendour of the Lakeside Theatre at the University has just been announced.
The fascinating theme of Futura Dystopia isn’t something that you’re likely to experience at the Co-op on a Monday morning, but it should make for a worthy experience within the post-modern (steady) surrounds of Square 5.
The schedule itself is a cracking run of futuristic films: Metropolis (16th May) Blade Runner [or Bladder Runner - arf] (23rd May) Monsters (13th June) and Children of Men (20th June.)
All films start at 7:30pm.
Back towards the town and it was fantastic to see that the recent Sunday afternoon screening of Bugs Life was fully booked for the showing at the William Loveless Hall.
Maybe this is an apt time to remind folk about the benefits of Moving Image membership?
“Annual membership of Moving Image will be £5.00 for 2010/11. Tickets will be £3.00 for members. Non-members will be able to buy tickets for £4.00 to include £1.00 guest membership. Tickets for under-16s will be £2.00 when family films are being screened.”
Sounds like something that you should be a stakeholder in.
Having spent six months in Wivenhoe and one afternoon in Brightlingsea (it was closed…) I feel suitably qualified in assessment to say that the esteemed Brightlingsea and Wivenhoe Chronicle is a bit back to front.
I know that it is all about respecting tradition, and probably pleasing advertisers - and rightfully so; but I reckon that the Wivenhoe Chronicle Incorporating Bits of Brightlingsea as an Added Back Page Bonus would make for a snappy newsstand title a the Co-op.
But hey hoe - what do I know?
So yeah, rejoice rejoice - a drop through the letterbox and blimey: it’s only another month and another copy of the ACE Brightlingsea and Wivenhoe Chronicle.
Overlooking the Brightlingsea news patch (please do) and we’re straight in with the news stories that the charming Scoop Scarpenter has been uncovering around these parts of late.
The front page is a shared effort with our Brightlingsea buddies covering the *shhh* Town and Borough local elections. I refer my honourable friends to the answer I gave in the blog post below.
Hilary Lazell’s Forthcoming Exhibition is the lead Wivenhoe story on p3:
“A Wivenhoe book illustrator will have an exhibition of her work at Colchester’s renowned independent bookshop Red Lion Books. The exhibition, Fairy Tales, will run from Thursday 21st April for a month.
One of her more unusual local commissions will be familiar to diners at Wivenhoe’s Upstairs restaurant at The Greyhound. Here she covered two walls with a mural depicting a slightly saucy story involving a beautiful French cafe dancer.”
Blimey.
A slightly saucy story French cafe dancer is just what I want before I tuck into my prawn cocktail.
The Community Safety Meeting coming up on 28th April in the Town Council gets a mention, as does the WivSocHeritage Walk on the morning of 8th May.
“At a potentially daunting run-time of somewhere under three hours, there was something about the breezy atmosphere of this Mary Williamson production, which made the time fly.”
A gold star for the Pop Genius for managing to slip in the Linda Lovelace reference - hurrah!
Jez Lowe and the Bad Pennies at the Folk Club at The Flag on 5th May get a plug, as does Around the World Two - Return Ticket, the latest production from Wivehoe based ADP Theatre, with two performances at the West Cliff Theatre in Clacton on 21st May.
And that’s about yet lot for local Wivenhoe news in the Chronicle this month. The Wivenhoe Chronicle Incorporating Bits of Brightlingsea as an Added Back Page Bonus hasn’t yet been submitted to print. It does seem something of a slow news month around these parts though.
The Brightlingsea and Wivenhoe Chronicle is distributed free amongst local households. Additional copies are 25p from local newsagents.
A WivSoc Wednesday with a difference this week - it’s only the AGM of our lovely local town civic society.
Cripes.
To the Nottage, fashionably late, and not so fashionably dressed. I did make an effort on the nautical front, sporting one of my latest charity shop finds from a recent trip to the Oldest Recorded.
Turns out that I wasn’t alone. For all yer Essex Man jibes, Wivenhoe Man is something of a salty sea dog. I wasn’t the only WivSoc Sir wearing a captain’s sea hat (although I take pride in the knowledge that mine was the biggest.)
Blimey.
But anyway - what of the business end of the WivSoc year? It was all routine stuff, with Mr Chair admirably sticking to the agenda, and sticking it (in a very, very polite way) to anything that might upset the balance of the old meets the new, that makes Wivenhoe such a charming place to live.
Which is precisely where the incredibly hard working WivSoc committee members come in. The meeting opened with the approval of the previous minutes, plus some fool wearing a silly sea hat walking in halfway through.
Whoops.
Mr Chair’s Report was deliberately brief - new members were made to fee most welcome.
The Secretary’s Report was the opportunity to outline in more detail some of the fine work of WivSoc over the past twelve months. Monitoring and responding to planning applications remains the main priority.
New procedures mean that objections now have to be channelled through Borough councillors, thus further complicating matters. WivSoc wishes to place on the record the support so far offered by Cllr Steve Ford of Wivenhoe Quay ward.
The WivSoc Newsletter was praised, providing members with quarterly updates not only on Society matters, but also locals items of a more general interest. I hear that the next issue has a half-decent front-page pic snapped by some hit and miss photographer.
For a Society that is all too conscience (often too Conscience in my opinion) of the ‘mature’ nature of the membership, it is rather ace to see the modern interweb being explored.
Members’ email updates are sent out when ever a matter of urgency arises. The Secretary highlighted recent issues such as the proposal to build on the land near to Millfields School, the sea wall clearance, Transition Town Wivenhoe updates and the impact of the Knowledge Gateway on the town as recent examples of online dialogue.
Outside of the internal mechanisms of WivSoc and it was also mentioned that the Society has a formal voice at the NAP meetings, the Wivenhoe Townscape Forum (local list) and still my fave ever group, the Wivenhoe Wood Working Party.
A big thank you went out to Cllr Bob Needham for giving up his Wednesday evenings once a month to offer feedback on WTC meetings. Nice hat m’Cllr friend - never mind the length, feel the thickness etc.
The Secretary wrapped up by saying that the WivSoc membership continues to grow, as well as observing developments within the town that reflect well for the future of Wivenhoe.
Helping Hands, Moving Image, TTW and *cough* the Wivenhoe Forum - all of these are positioned well to help out in Wivenhoe as we face what is likely to be unstable economic times ahead.
Speaking of all things fiscal - it’s only the WivSoc Treasurer’s Report…
The Society’s finances are “healthy.” Let’s leave it at that. Well, not quite… A *shhh* three figure surplus was made in the last financial year. No deficit deniers upstairs at the Nottage on Wednesday night.
£200 was donated towards Wivenhoe in Bloom. All social events made a profit. The increase in membership numbers covers the running cost of WivSoc.
Thanks were rightfully given to our friends from Rollo Estates, Eyecare, the Co-op and EWS skip hire, for very kind sponsorship and support over the year.
Chair’s Q & A simply put out the request for any tree expert within Wivenhoe to step forward. Help is needed in identifying any trees in the town that might need a little TLC. Having accidentally managed to floor one in my own back garden after only three months of living here, I thought it best not to volunteer.
The election of officers followed, with the motion to keep subscription rates as the same level also passed.
Any Other Business?
Um, booze?
Almost. Time first for a splendid talk by Anthony Roberts, the esteemed Artistic Director@ColchesterArts. With a #hyperlocal artistic history boasting Francis Bacon (sort of,) the Lakeside (not quite Wivenhoe) and the grand plans for the old Engine Shed (um…) Anthony was preaching to the converted.
We heard a wonderful social history of the old building, covering a barely plausible Humpty Dumpty reference, and leading up to the opening of the ace arts space in 1980.
Anthony then spelt out his vision for @ColchesterArts to champion new and emerging talent. The importance of online culture was emphasised, with a brilliant explanation of how the modern interweb has helped the centre to build new communities and change the artistic experience.
And then it was time for booze. Except @AnnaJCowen and I took something of a liking to the food first, and didn’t really move away from the buffet table. Some charming conversations followed, and then soon it was chucking out time at The Nottage.
No worries - we stopped off at the Rose and Crown and necked eight pints of Carlsberg each, and were back at base in time for the Ten O’clock News.
Only joking. It was the Eleven O’clock News. Fashionably late, and timing has never been my strong point. Nice nautical hat though.
To the Town Council office on Monday evening for the monthly meeting of the Wivenhoe Town Council.
Cripes.
Relax, m’South London Comrades - WTC is largely apolitical, comprising of locally elected representatives who have the best interests of the town at heart.
Unlike, um…
Democracy and representation appears to be alive and well within Wivenhoe. Eight of our fine councillors were in attendance, with apologies from the absent three.
Perhaps even more poignant was the appearance of seven locals in the public galley (random chairs scattered around the room) and a couple of local Colchester Borough Councillors to provide updates for their patch.
This was the first meeting of WTC since the blatant act of vandalism by the Environment Agency on the vegetatation of the banks of the Colne. Mr Mayor, Brian Sinclair, was aware of the public interest and moved this item to the top of the agenda.
Mr Mayor, explaining the position of WTC on the Colne clearance, read out a brief statement:
“We have had lots of phone calls and conversations since the work started. Wivenhoe Town Council empathises with the feelings of residents who are deeply angered and upset with the Environment Agency.
We were aware that the work was planned, but no actual start date was given. Local information was limited to A4 sized posters appearing by the site. We have made enquiries with the Environment Agency about the work. This is part of a national policy.
If any residents which to take the matter further, we have provided some information slips [reproduced below...] There is nothing else that we can do as a town council - we have done all that we can.”
The welcome information slip states:
Dear Resident,
WTC are aware and concerned about the distress caused by the rapid clearance of the sea walls. We are unable to stop this national policy but if you width to complain to the EA, the contact is 01473 706 100, [email protected]
A quick click and a rational email explaining your concerns, and hopefully the strength of local opposition regarding the destruction of our natural beauty will be registered.
But for some within the meeting, the statement from WTC didn’t go far enough. Up stepped a local resident to address the council, and to explain some revealing background information that has emerged through dealing with the EA staff on site.
“The notices put up by the EA were not specific to Wivenhoe. The same notices have been posted at scores of places all over East Anglia. In the case of Wivenhoe the reasons offered by the EA for the vegetation clearance turn out to be spurious. There’s no problem with rabbits, and the supposedly troublesome roots are still in the ground. There’s no problem with inspections – the inspectors have already graded the different sections of the seawall, in drawing up the Shoreline Management Plan. And there’s no risk to people and property upriver – that’s what the Barrier is for, to protect us from a repeat of the 1953 flood tide – and downriver, the possible future flooding of the grazing marsh has already been planned for, as part of the policy of managed retreat.
So, what’s the real reason for the vegetation clearance?
Nick Purdie [EA official] says: Our ultimate aim is to reduce all the vegetation to short grass – even long grasses are a problem because they mask bare earth - and it’s ‘bare earth’ which makes seawalls vulnerable in the event of over-topping by a tidal surge.
So this policy is all about planning for a worst-case scenario – which may be fine when there’s a risk to people and property – but doesn’t make sense downriver, in the event of a major flood, when flooding the grazing marsh would actually be necessary to absorb the pressure of the tide.
Mr Purdie also stressed how serious they are about achieving this objective of reducing the flora on seawalls to a monoculture. They’re currently experimenting at specific locations in Alresford, Brightlingsea and elsewhere with intensive regimes of repeated cutting: twice or three times a year. And they’re developing new technologies to do this, pioneering mechanical strimmers attached to diggers, which can do the job better than humans.
There’s a lot of controversy throughout East Anglia surrounding the Environment Agency’s policy on flood defences, (mainly to do with coastal erosion and managed retreat). One of the main complaints is the Agency’s repeated failure to notify and consult. Local Essex and Suffolk MPs like Therese Coffey (Suffolk Coastal) John Whittingdale (Maldon) and Priti Patel (Witham) are well aware of this. I think it’s worth people writing, if they feel strongly about this, to Bernard Jenkin.
Our case is a strong one:
It’s about the democratic deficit – the shocking lack of consultation.
It’s about bureaucratic arrogance – the policy being applied to Wivenhoe is inappropriate and incoherent.
And it’s about cost. The EA are spending £750,000 on this.
Where people and property are not at risk, it’s the needs of local residents and wildlife which should take precedence over the schemes of bureaucrats.”
Blimey.
This was a damning report to WTC, delivered with great passion and eloquence. It appears too late for any action to prevent this first wave of destruction. I would wager that the Environment Agency is not in for such an easy ride when they next return to the banks of the Colne, bent on yet further environmental destruction.
In support of WTC, Mr Mayor recognised the concerns of the local resident, and asked for a copy of the fine speech to fully take on the local concerns.
The rest of the WTC meeting was always then going to be routine, if indeed debate about Cook’s, the Wivenhoe Woodwork Party and Mr Mayor’s stolen civic bicycle (blimey) can ever be described as routine.
But first, here are some words from the big boys and girls of Colchester Borough Council. I rather liked the approach of Wivenhoe residents having speaking rights ahead of our CBC friends.
Councillor Cory of Wivenhoe Cross ward addressed the meeting first:
“I have mainly been dealing with parking complaints. Students are usually to blame. I approach this problem methodologically. If cars are parked illegally then I contact the police. If it is inconsiderate parking then I attach a small flyer.
Potholes [aha!] are currently the bain of my life. The large hole by The Flag has now been filled in. Sadly it has now opened up again. I will keep on reporting this to Highways until it is fixed. I have asked why the CBC gritting policy doesn’t include estates and pavements.
There was an ASBO issue in my ward. I have been working closely with PCSO Neville, who has carried out some wonderful work to help resolve this. There are some drainage issues up towards Broomgrove. Anglia Water has been informed.”
Taking a walk downtown (and depending on your geographical point of view, either going upmarket or slumming it…) and next up was Councillor Quarrie of Wivenhoe Quay ward:
“We have just had the full budget meeting at CBC. We [the Conservative group] wanted to reduce the annual £150,000 funding for local councils. Sadly this was voted out.”
A written report from Councillor Julie Young of Essex County Council (so many layers of the political onion to peel away here in Wivenhoe) was then read out by Mr Mayor:
“With the failure of the pedestrian crossing by the Co-op to reach any conclusion, I have successfully lobbied for a new bus shelter to be built with the funds.
I am happy to report that no libraries will be closing in Essex. There will be reduced opening hours for some libraries, although Wivenhoe doesn’t appear to be affected.
The transport subsidy for parents whose children attend Faith schools will be reduced. This will impact on Wivenhoe parents who send their children to the Catholic school in Colchester. Families on low income will still receive support.
The full budget for Essex County Council is being set this week. Women’s Refuge and Alcoholics Anonymous look like having funding being withdrawn. We are making slow progress [arf!] with the 20mph speed zone for Wivenhoe.”
With the WTC meeting now racing through the agenda, hopes were high of catching the second half of the West Ham match back at base. Feedback was then provided on the various sub-committees that comprise WTC. You’d be hard pressed to find a better named committee anywhere in the land that can compete with out very own Wivenhoe Woodwork Party - oh yes…
A report on public transport produced great excitement (steady the buffers) with news of the new bus stops in Colchester. Amazingly the Wivenhoe bus stops are actually correct for once.
Questions were raised about whom is liasing with the fine May Fair folk regarding the traffic flow on the big day. Mr Mayor confirmed that a meeting is planned for later this week.
Other transport issues were then discussed, but sadly the Fog of Politics got in the way. A bit of CBC politico gossiping between our borough council friends in-between WTC contributions, and I couldn’t catch all of the details (transport matters - *not* CBC chitter chatter.)
No worries. On to Planning.
Oh Lordy…
Councillor Cyril Liddy updated WTC with recent applications. Changes to the front of the Royal British Legion have been submitted (supported by the good folk of WivSoc) as well as “various miscellaneous domestic applications.”
Of greater interest however is the continuing saga of Cook’s Shipyard. Councillor Liddy confirmed:
“The developer is now ready to move forward and wants to know when we can sign the lease. This is in the hands of the solicitors - we’re not actually ready yet.”
It seems that the developer has made a change to the original planning application regarding the five polyfunctional [urgh!] units. A change of use from A1 to A3 has been put forward. CBC has no objections. Once again the Fog of Politics prevented me from hearing further.
The Personnel Committee confirmed that WTC’s wonderful litter picker, Ray, has announced his plans for a well-deserved retirement. Mr Mayor praised Ray and his work with the highest regard, adding, “he will be impossible to replace.”
Hear, hear. It seems that everywhere I go around the town, Ray is always present. Has this man be cloned?
The Finance and Admin Committee reported that the WTC budget has been re-affirmed. Speaking of penny-pinching, with the imminent move of our local police team to the fire station, it was also confirmed that the WTC policy is to try and keep the old buildings in public use. Discussions are taking place as to how WTC can acquire them.
The Best Value Committee (not quite the best committee title, but close…) reported on the plan for WTC to purchase some basic IT equipment for planning purposes. This will allow submissions to be projected on to the wall, rather than shuffling around paper copies.
Still with us?
It was around this stage of the evening that I was in need of a comfort break. And with perfect timing, it’s only an update from the Working Party on the refurbishment of the ladies loos at the William Loveless Hall.
Oh Lordy.
Pleased to report that the marbled halls of female sanitary (um…) are on time and budget. A grand opening is expected in time for Mr Mayor’s Charity Ball next month. Hurrah!
Trumping the Best Value and the toilet updates was of course the Wivenhoe Woodwork Party. Nope - not a late night carpentry lock in at The Station, but valuable updates regarding the upkeep of Wivenhoe Wood. The bark (ouch) is worse than the bite - all is well within Wivenhoe Wood.
It was then wonderful to hear the highest praise coming the way of Wivenhoe youth facilities, and in particular, the re-launched Hub down at the Phillip Road Centre.
Tuesday evenings were reported as being a tremendous success. WTC credited the individuals involved, for growing such a fantastic facility out of so few resources. It was also noted on record how pleased WTC is to see a return of the Wivenhoe Youth Council. Mr Mayor is keen to involve this body in more formal visits to the Town Council offices.
A request has been from members of the Hub to extend the skateboard facilities at KGV. This is currently being considered by WTC.
Community Safety reported that crime in Wivenhoe is currently on the up.
Wwwwwwhat…?
Sleep safely at night my friends - all crime is bad crime, but don’t believe the hard data. Mr Mayor’s proud civic bicycle (re-cycled from a council skip, donchta know….) was only half-inched right outside The Greyhound.
The Scoundrels!
Councillor Penny Kraft fed back on the latest NAP meeting - more (much more over here...)
Finance then reported on the sale of some chairs from the William Loveless Hall. I think this is Dave’s #bigsociety in action, right on our Wivenhoe doorstep.
On Administration matters, plans are pressing ahead to abolish the Cross and Quay distinctions for WTC matters. This will not affect the CBC wards. With an increased workload, the plan is also to raise the number of (unpaid) WTC councillor’s from eleven to thirteen.
Did someone say an election is around the corner…?
And finally, back to Highways, which always seems to be something of a hot potato around Wivenhoe. Elmstead Road is due to close for essential gasworks for a period of five weeks. This will cover roughly the stretch from The Flag up to the football club.
The advance planning and publicity by the gas utility was praised by WTC as an example of how outside agencies *can* work successfully in partnership with local representatives and residents.
I think that’s the nearest that WTC will come to having a dig at the Environment Agency. Meanwhile, the diggers down at the Colne edge ever closer towards the old Crab ‘n Winkle line…
Keely Moore: Get yaselves down to the river wye - beautiful - we’ve been for some lovely hols messing about on the river - couple of BnB’s along the way and you can...
