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To Sunny Colch! …on Saturday afternoon for the second Colchester Free Festival, staged in the splendour of Castle Park. As I had to carefully explain to @AnnaJCowen on the Wivenhoe FUN Express train - all that you need to know is that this is a FESTIVAL, being staged in COLCHESTER and whaddya know: it’s FREE.

Splendid.

This was the “difficult second album” syndrome for the Free Festival, something that Ben Howard of the festival team explained to me later in the day. The unexpected and triumphant success of last summer had led to much expectation second time around.

Could the Sunny Colchester kids pull it off? Is Bob Russell a self-styled arts philistine?

Um…

Much of the early morning was spent cloud busting. It was a big gamble to shift the festival to the Bank Holiday weekend. Mr BBC Weather Man seemed to have doomed the event on Friday night, with a big black blob of BLEURGHHH hovering over Britain’s Oldest Recorded.

Never trust a weatherman wearing an over-sized suit is the mantra in which I live my life. He’s probably got something to hide down below the waistline, and is no doubt trying to divert your attention away with meteorological myths of Biblical flooding at the Free Festival.

I put on my Speedos as an act of defiance, and invited the locals to rub factor 50 in all the places where Mr BBC Weatherman wanted you to stay away from. I wasn’t alone in my actions, but that’s enough about my bruncheon at The Minories - what about the Free Festival, I hear you ask?

With four main stage areas, you needed a map to negotiate your rites of passage. @AnnaJCowen and I stumbled across the Castle Stage first, found a vantage point and then settled down for the next six hours, assuming that this was the Main Stage.

It was only at around the time that the sun was setting over Castle Park that we realised that we had missed most of the Free Festival.

Only joking.

It was clear early on that the fears of a Bank Holiday wipeout weren’t justified. Half of Colchester had come out to have some fun, celebrating the magnificence that is Castle Park, and keen to put aside the misconception that culture in Colchester can best be found in the Kingdom of the Wild at Colchester Zoo.

We manoeuvred down to the Main Stage, just in time to hear Ady Johnson start up his set with Pink Flamingos. Boosted by a brass and strings section, yer man Ady was also supported by a brief rainbow appearance towards the back of the park.

It started somewhere near Stanway, with the pot of gold located close to the Greenstead roundabout. Or maybe it was the Trotters Real Ale and Cider bar towards the back of the site?

Chin chin.

My plan of attack for the afternoon was to be the wandering sprit of the Free Festival. Have flip cam, mp3 recorder and SLR - will travel. Bugger that I thought as Housework, Colchester’s hardest working house band bounced on to the Main Stage to start the afternoon party.

Housework in Castle Park is 1,000 times better than housework back at base for a Saturday afternoon. Polished to perfection - and that was just the backstage toilets.

Time to wander - time to try and capture the free love feel of the Free Festival with my camera. A slight Goth photo mishap en route to the bandstand - apologies Sir. Or was it Madam?

Moving on…

The historic Castle Park bandstand has no doubt been host to many a dignified and worthy performance throughout its proud history. Adding to that list now is the rather mangled mini-rave that was in full swing come mid-afternoon.

It took me right back to my University dancehalls days underneath the podia on a Friday night. Glo sticks, grins and gabba gabba - keep close, @AnnaJCowen - you may just cop a thick ‘un.

We were caught in some generational time shift. Too old for the yoof of Generation YYY, and with no kid accessory as was required for the lovely, lovely Kidstival area.

We’ll find some sanity over with the little people, was the idea. Instead we found Daleks being chased, Digging for Victory in the makeshift beach and delightful cup cakes to add that extra afternoon energy kick.

“Head for El Buffalo Tanque” it what we had been hearing all week. What’s not to like about sustainable living with a salsa South American feel? Johnny Buffalo and his bonkers team of recruits had staged something quite special along the side of the old Castle.

Attacking armies throughout history have nothing on the crazed minds of El Tanque. I feared for the museum artefacts within Colchester Castle, laid siege with a heady mix of inter-gender mud-wrestling, fish eye galleria and burlesque.

Blimey.

It was as though Guantanamo Bay had come to Britain’s Oldest Recorded, fuelled up with strong South American alcohol to add a friendly fire approach to the madness. Either that or an overweight Slipknot tribute act had been booked in to play.

I wasn’t sure of the camera etiquette inside the burlesque tent, and given the sexual dominance of the buxom lady performer, I wasn’t going to take any chances. I was looked over for the audience participation - which is just as well, seeing as though my own Buffalo Tanque was showing some slight interest down below.

And then whaddya know - tonight Matthew, I’m going to be a burlesque dancer, aided with the very kind audience participation of a Colchester Goth.

Cripes.

The Goth gave a good show, and was very good-natured in playing along for the ride. “I don’t fancy yours much,” I whispered to @AnnaJCowen as we left the tent, trying to half-conceal my own pale faced head that was still giving me cause for concern down below.

It all got a little giddy with the gaffa tape orgy that we walked straight into. This seemed like a suitable time to try and clear our heads from all of the Mexican madness that El Tanque had corrupted us with for most of the afternoon.

As ever, I blame the Bike Guru - I would gladly have wrestled the bike spanner waving bloke, had I not been too busy trying to record the current contest, and failing miserably to capture any of the actual wrestling action.

A healthy recuperation was found at the Hollytrees Stage, with a David Essex look-alike (pre-Eastenders) performing the Ballad of John and Yoko. That’s not something that you are likely to see down the road at V Festival.

A charming chat with the folk from Colchester Circle, and then Wivenhoe’s Moving Image by the @15QueenStreet bus, and then CAV OK came-a-calling back down by the Main Stage.

But what about some Animal Noise first? Nope - nothing to do with Goths and giving head, but the remarkable power trio of unlikely local lads that were adding some acoustic folk energy (seriously) to the main stage.

I’ve come across Animal Noise before @15QueenStreet. Playing a hush hush unplugged front room gig, the rising stars of the Colchester scene apologised for keeping it quiet. Truth to be told and the Noise Abetment folk almost came round.

These boys can ROCK.

But only in an acoustic, mixed up messy folk type of way, you understand. Which sort of makes it all right.

We took up an ACE backstage view [get you] and saw at first hand just how to work a Colchester crowd, who were clearly loving the noise being made by… Animal Noise.

Headliners next year, I tell ya.

The Funk Soul Brothers backstage seemed to be having the most fun of the afternoon behind the Main Stage DJ booth. You can’t beat a good bit of skanking on a Saturday afternoon. It was infectious stuff, and I confess to skanking my way all over to the toilet portakbain.

I met en route young Ben Tyler, genuine guitar hero of CAV OK, the band who had the unenviable task of following Animal Noise. I asked Ben about his latest release, which was about to be made in a portakabin backstage.

Boom boom.

Definitely not toilet humour, but still squeaky clean bum time was my catch up with the good @nickjbarlow, the Colchester Borough Councillor for Castle ward. Nick is very supportive of the Free Festival - he is also partial to a little foot tapping whilst doing the semi-politico talk.

Enough of the very good Cllr, what about the slightly more than OK CAV OK?

CAV OK have a considerable following and it’s easy to see why. The boys in black (well, three fifths) look the part as much as they sound. I lost @AnnaJCowen during the set, knowing that the girl had drifted off into her rock star fantasy world. You have more chance with the David Essex look-alike, luv.

Follow that, Modern English. Or even back to Ben Howard, first…

And then with perfect hyperlocal comic timing, just as the homecoming headline heroes of Modern English were set to play their most important Colchester gig in more than three decades, @AnnaJCowen and I had to bugger off back to base to feed the cat.

Whoops.

All aboard the Wivenhoe FUN Express once again, and we reflected upon the afternoon that had just played out. The Colchester Free Festival is better than the Lambeth Show - this is HIGH praise indeed.

In just two years the festival has found its own identity, sticking with a fearsome local approach that is clearly appealing to the good folk of Colchester. The energy of the local music scene, accommodating the kids and even El Tanque - this is a festival that can only take place at Castle Park.

Many many thanks to all those who volunteered to help entertain - Ben Howard, Andy Winmill, Marc De’ath, Lee Carter, Jo Caldwell, Johnny Buffalo, Jonathan Doyle, Nial Harrington, Lee Pugh and a whole army of others, some of whom may *or may not* be Goths.

Mr BBC Weather Man never did get to lob his great big black blob of BLEURGHHH all over Britain’s Oldest Recorded. Sunshine and smiles, all the way until next summer, folks.

Splendid.

Full flickr feed over here.

A lost Saturday afternoon spent drinking coffee, talking bicycles and listening to poetry; half pints of lager shandy at The Greyhound were also involved.

Splendid.

It all started off so innocently - most mistakes do these days - but somehow managed to manifest into a late August afternoon of shandy and scones.

Whoops.

A very kind invite for mid-morning coffee round at the home of Wivenhoe’s esteemed Bike Guru got Saturday off to a good start. Any man who likes to combine cycling with coffee is always worth a chin wag with.

As well as offering a Bike Guru service around Wivenhoe, plus manning the mechanical duties at the very ACE Re-Cycle across in Colchester, Matt - for he is your Bike Guru - is about to set up a cycling ‘n coffee shop down by the old bus station in Sunny Colch.

It’s an idea that is not new to London, and hopefully now is the perfect time to introduce a similar service around these North Essex estuary parts. As well as serving high-class coffee, bike repairs will be available, all within a space that celebrates cycling culture.

This may take the form of showing live coverage of the Grand Tours, or perhaps film evenings to screen some of the classic cycling documentaries.

Keep Colchester Cycling will also be based down at the kiosks in the old bus station, sharing the space with Bike Guru and his coffee n’ cycling cultural exchange.

Meanwhile, back in Wivenhoe and there was a coffee machine to road test. I admit to being more of a Tetley Tea type of chap - perhaps at a push then a rather generous teaspoon of Nescafe if I’m going for that continental look.

It was certainly an education in the Wivenhoe kitchen as I was shown how the machine works, or rather how you work with the machine and tame all that lively hissing and spurting.

The Bike Guru has grand plans, and having listened to them with great interest, I explained my own grand plan for the remainder of the day:

Mr Mule, LIVE and DIRECT Upstairs at The Greyhound.

Oh Lordy.

A brief bicycle fixation back at my base, and soon we were propping up the bar, ordering the half shandies and even shouting a round for the always engaging Pop Genius of this Parish.

Currently trading as Wivenhoe’s Leading Light Entertainer - and who are we to doubt this? - Mr Mule was on fine form as he prepared to entertain the afternoon crowd Upstairs at The Greyhound with verse, song and good humour.

Some parallels were in place from what I had heard from Matt earlier in the day. Upstairs at The Greyhound is a dead space during the day. Much like the old kiosks in Colchester, Mr Mule is keen to explore this and fill it with happy folk.

It was a mixed crowd that had come to see the Leading Entertainer - a local borough Councillor, a young chap dreading the Back to School routine that awaits, Mr Mule’s Mum.

Blimey.

The first half of the performance focussed upon The Hythe. Not at all wanting to claim credit for being the muse for Mr Mule, but having read my recent @Colchester101 piece all about the old industrial heartbeat of the Colne, this sparked an interest in revisiting some of his previous research.

In the unlikely event that you find yourself standing on the platform at the Hythe train station, do take the time to take in the words and ideas that decorate the area. This was a commission for Mr Mule, who undertook months of research and writing.

[note to self: you may have a fancy dan stereo mic mp3 gizmo, but it still sounds slightly ropey, unless you are sitting facing the performer - doh! Apologies...]

These ideas also came together for one Saturday afternoon only, Upstairs at The Greyhound. We heard about the old boys who worked the port, the returning commuters from Liverpool Street and the whores of Hythe Hill.

It’s quite a lively area, I tell you.

Mr Mule was joined by Dr Adrian May, a well-known figure on the folk circuit, and a Hythe resident. His murder ballad was one of the most beautiful pieces of music that I have heard in some time, and somehow it just seemed to make perfect sense on a Saturday afternoon at The Greyhound, just as the estuary rain took issue with the fag end of the summer.

Mr Mule returned for a mandolin version of Home Counties Boy. I have touched on before how this is his personal calling card. Everything that you need to know about Wivenhoe’s (current) Leading Light Entertainer is encapsulated in song and verse.

And then just as the Pop Genius sang:

“and don’t drop your H’s, my mum said to me…”

…I glimpsed his dear old Ma sitting opposite have a twinkle in her eye, a slight foot tappin’ moment and an even a singing of the chorus.

Awww…

Lovely.

Mr Mule of course was oblivious to it all, doing the rock ‘n roll thing. Still, the moment was there, and I’m sure a very proud dear old Ma went home feeling rather happy.

Just like me.

A brief break for beer and scones, care of the wonderful @Seelkram and his burgeoning Well Bread Wivenhoe business, and then we were back for more songs and dance (sort of) from the top turn of the afternoon.

Pound for pound this was poetry and pastry value for money. Where else on a hit and miss North Essex Saturday afternoon are you going mix songs, scones and shandy?

So yeah - quite a random start to the weekend. I blame the seriously strong coffee.

More of the same please, kind Sirs.