Crap Match Report

Jase » 03 April 2011 » In wivenhoe »

To Broad Lane on Saturday afternoon for the third weekend in a row. A month long run of Saturday home matches for the Dragons - did someone say *shhh* a Wivenhoe Town regular? I did come close to shouting out “C’mon Dulwich!” at one stage. That stage just happened to be after the third pint Fosters.

Back of the net!

Which is something that @AnnaJCowen and I missed, arriving in our usual fashionably late time frame.

I had a bit of lycra bother back at base: is a skintight Brixton Cycles Co-op cycling top really suitable clothing etiquette for North Essex non-league football? Probably not, but no one was watching, in more ways than one.

And so we took up our new found home patch along the left side of the pitch, set up the SLR and then looked up to see that Ely City were celebrating.

Bugger.

I say Ely City, but for a place with a population of just 15,000 last time the census form did the rounds, then all this bullish (steady) talk of Colchester becoming a city is soon put into perspective. Safe to say that the urban city away support for the city of Ely was out sung by the mere townsfolk of Wivenhoe.

The routine for the rest of the game was then put in place. This was proper, brutal, powerhouse football. It may have been like a 90 minute long game of head tennis, but the sheer physical force was something to be admired. I’m just pleased that I wasn’t wearing my lycra shorts.

There wasn’t a great deal of continental flair on offer at Broad Lane. Which brings us nicely on to Philippe Phlope - nope, not the Dragon’s latest Francais flair player, but simply the footwear of choice that some supporters had taken to wearing out in the Wivenhoe sun.

The Dragons soon equalised, and then a ‘keeper mishap gave Ely the lead once again. Wivenhoe responded with a similar up ‘em and at ‘em style goal, and the game certainly seemed like the best way to spend £6 in Wivenhoe on a Saturday afternoon.

With Ely relying upon a Rory Delap style long throw, I thought I would try my luck as the ball bounced off the pitch and into my hands. It may not have been the best return of the ball, but the Lino was stretching it a bit when he signalled a foul throw back at me.

In true Crap Match Report tradition, work was calling back at base, and so we disappeared before full time, and just after seeing Ely take the lead once again with a bender of a free kick.

The bikes were being unlocked outside the clubhouse, and a couple more cheers went up. That will be the city masses from Ely then, celebrating an improbable 5-2 away victory.

The defeat leaves the Dragons in 18th place in the Ridgeons Premier League, and perilously close to the drop. The current run of home matches for Wivenhoe Town extends to next weekend when league leaders Leiston are the visitors.