onionbagblog

Spring 2012: hyperlocal history will recall it as the period where rain water replaced sun rays, the Co-op had a run on Ibuprofen (apologies) and Wivenhoe Town Council did the door-to-door delivery thing, selling window shammys.

Oh, hang on - that knock, knock, knock at the door wasn’t a WTC sales pitch, but the delivery of the latest Wivenhoe Town Council News for Spring 2012.

Hurrah!

Whaddya mean that window cleaning isn’t included in my Council Tax bill?

The proposed Jubilee Garden leads the way, with one of those architectural drawings that manages to somehow make even a rubble of land look like a stunning 21st Century structure that should be taking its place down at the South Bank.

This is Wivenhoe, dahhhhling!

And thank the chuffers for that.

The drawing of the Jubilee Garden may look a little chi chi, but the hard toil of Transition Town Wivenhoe and others will soon deliver a very practical nature garden, right in the centre of the town:

“As part of the town council’s programme for the Queen’s Jubilee, we have prepared plans for a Jubilee garden in the area of unused land behind the council offices. A substantial part of the funding for this has already been obtained from Cory Environmental Trust, and we are actively looking for more.”

Dig for Victory, Comrades. Preferably anytime from 10am - 4pm on 13th May when the lovely folk of TTW will next be volunteering to make the rubble look an architectural wet dream.

Speaking of tugging away at bell ends, what about the grand peeling of the St Mary’s bells, taking place on the morning of Monday 4th June to celebrate Brenda’s 60th year on the throne?

DING DONG, etc.

The WTC newsletter also helpfully updates with other officially endorsed items on the Jubilee agenda:

2nd June - June Market and Art on the Railings

2nd June - Diamond Jubilee Ball in the William Loveless Hall [where else?]

3rd June - Church Thanksgiving Service

4th June - Pealing of the bells and FUN Day at the KGV

FUN Days always need to be capped up, Comrades. Just so y’know what you’re letting yourself in for.

Central to Wivenhoe… is a half-decent read all about the successful purchase of the two old police houses along the High Street by WTC. It can’t be underestimated what a stroke of strategic genius this move was, linking up the run of civic owned property right in the heart of Wivenhoe. You never know when your friendly local WTC wants to build a motorway right across the town…

“The potential to provide a substantial community facility is enormous. The decision was a bold one. It was taken with confidence that townsfolk are supportive of the measure and that a once in a lifetime opportunity might be passed by.”

Fine work, fellas and fella-esses.

The Wivenhoe Co-operative Community Group gets a mention, with news of an afternoon tea event at Stuart Pawsey Court aimed at those people of any age who would like to pop in and meet the residents and others.

Which is not something that you’re likely to read on a Daily Mail front page, and which is why Wivenhoe is all the better for such hyperlocal updates from WTC.

A roll call of improvements is listed for the William Loveless Hall over the past civic year. These include new flooring in the main hall, total refurbishment of the ladies’ toilet and a VIP suite installed with a customised cocktail bar and subscription style TV screens for the more discerning of residents.

Possibly.

Wivenhoe Helping Hands continues to grow, as is documented in the WTC newsletter:

“Over 100 residents have been helped with a total of over 600 jobs since the start up nearly two years ago..”

Volunteers, as ever, are always in short supply. 0783 445 2764 should suffice.

An update on the proposed new medical centre behind the Fire Station is also published. Put simply, the wonga is sitting in a safe bank account, waiting for the negotiations with the landowner to proceed.

You can hear Bernie Boy bang on about it towards the end of this audio [recorded at around 2am in a very tired and emotional state, a situation that you should never allow yourself to fall into with a Conservative MP...]

Memorial Plaques [no connection with Conservative MP's] seem like a very dignified and affordable idea. WTC is proposing that these be made available for folk from the town, who perhaps might have passed away elsewhere, but whose memory remains in Wivenhoe.

You can take the old boy out of Wivenhoe, etc…

And finally:

There is no such thing as a Poo Fairy.

Nope - not a new hyperlocal Wivenhoe nursery rhyme that they are teaching the little ankle biters down at the Montessori, but a polite reminder to dog folk to pick up Fido’s faeces.

Hopefully it won’t be a time for skid marks when the Annual Wivenhoe Town Council Meeting takes place on 9th May, 7:30pm at the William Loveless Hall [where else?]

All welcome.

Don’t forget yer doggy bag.