onionbagblog

One Sunday you’re sat in The Greyhound answering questions about Reo Speedwagon as part of the Radio Wivenhoe pub quiz; the following week and you’re sat in the very same seats, listening to Mr Mule reading out passages from Edgar Allen Poe.

My kinda pub…

Billed as The Night Before Hallowe’en - seasonal spook readings from Miss Hilary Lazell, Les Bell, George Mac and Mr Mule - Sunday evening at The Greyhound was the Wivenhoe equivalent of a fireside chat with Roosevelt, only with the economy replaced by the paranormal.

Or was it the other way round?

Either way, there was an eerie feel in the front saloon of The Greyhound. Only the occasional rumble of the No. 78 bus punctuated the silence. I discreetly went for a light touch scratching of the old fella down below. Some Halloween decor simultaneously fell from the ceiling.

Best keep the old boy in check for the remainder of the evening, I reminded @AnnaJCowen.

The art of storytelling is a skill that some say is in danger of dying out. Not so on a Sunday evening in Wivenhoe. Miss Lazell has the wolf in sheep’s clothes approach; sweetness and light with the elocution - a killer twist for the conclusion. Les Ball contributed some pieces specifically written for the evening. George Mac read out with his wonderful twist of that, um, John Otway classic, The Highwayman.

Mr Mule meanwhile did the Mr Mule thing - which is a selection of the obscure literary influences that have played a part in his prose, and then some seasonally timed personal work that made you look over your shoulder as he added a hyperlocal feel to the Halloween spooking.

The Day the Dead Began to Dance may *or may not* have been written about an aerobics class at the William Loveless Hall.

Similar to last year, it was standing room only in the saloon bar. Unlike the spooking of 2010, the North Essex estuary weather allowed the grace of a pair of shorts to be worn during the witching hour. That’s something that you’re unlikely to see in the Director’s Cut for The Exorcist.

An impromptu meeting of the Wivenhoe branch of the Surrey County Cricket Club Supporters’ Association got mixed in with all the ghouly goings on, as the good @MatthewLinely pulled up a bar stool. I’ve always reasoned that Chris Tremlett is something of a Herman Munster sorta guy.

With *ahem* medical matters on my own mind, the cautionary tale of Dr Claw - the practicing GP at a hyperlocal surgery close to you - sent a shiver down my spine, and a mental reminder to eat my five a day. And drink five a day of course.

Chin Chin.

And so for one night only, The Greyhound became a cavern of creepy crawly unpleasantness.

Whaddya mean for one night only?

Only joking…

Next year: St Peter’s in Alresford would make for the perfect hyperlocal Halloween location to hear all about the hit and miss hyperlocal blogger who had his left leg amputated after an unfortunate incident locked in the beer cellar of The Black Buoy.

And with perfect comedy timing, I am reminded that Ray Parker Junior was indeed one of the answers in the Radio Wivenhoe pub quiz.

I’m more of a Timothy Claypole man, myself.