It’s certainly easier to pull down a swimming pool than it is to agree to build a new one. Here’s hoping that the vigour in bulldozing the old pool at Clap’ham Manor Street can be met with the same zeal, once construction work commences on Future Clap’ham.

I shall miss Clap’ham Manor. There remains some unique character about the old building, even it its last death throws. It’s breaks my heart to look back at images of the lovely old pool.

Here be the old reception area, the scene on my 7am smiles (and slight flirtations) with the lovely GLL receptionist staff. If you find a fiver lost underneath all the rubble, um, it’s mine.

Judging by the speed of the destruction, it can’t be long until the main pool is plundered next. Here’s hoping they haven’t forgotten to pull the plug.

After all the pessimism coming out my little patch of South London over the past seven days, how fantastic to finish on a high. Sunday afternoon saw me suited and booted as I cycled the short distance to Clapham Trinity Church, and the Civic Ceremony for the lovely @mayoroflambeth.

The service was a celebration of the civic duty of Mr Mayor, as well as the opportunity to raise the profile of the various charities that he has supported over the past nine months of public office.

It takes something quite special to get me into a church these days. Having seen how Mr Mayor has represented the borough so proudly, an hour or so spent sitting in the SW4 pews was the least I could do.

I wasn’t alone in wanting to honour such fine civic duty. Mayoral representation from almost every other London borough had gathered in Clapham, to pay tribute the work of Mr Mayor in Lambeth.

I tweeted “What is the collective noun for a gathering of Mayors?” Three replies of “a chain” came back to me, just as I somehow managed to blag my way into the church crèche robing chamber to mingle amongst all the fake mink fur.

Mr Mayor shook my hand (white gloves! *pristine* white gloves!) and very kindly agreed to my door-stopping request for a brief @audioboo.

We rightly touched upon the fine parallel work of @LamYouthMayor, an initiative that bodes well for democracy in Lambeth over the coming years. It is no coincidence that Lambeth’s Youth Mayor, Samueal Manley, has been such an equal success to his civic elder. Aiming high is infectious.

I took up my place in the pews, and by a strange twist of fate, was joined by the good Councillor Rachael Heywood, the Cabinet Member for Culture (leisure) and Communities, sitting right next to me.

Aye aye. Tempting, but now wasn’t the time.

Mr Mayor made his grand entrance with the Mayoral procession, and I tried to remember the words to some long lost hymns from Sunday school. Even for a non-believer, the service was rather uplifting. The emphasis was on charity, with speakers from all of the main organisations that Mr Mayor has campaigned for, being given the opportunity to speak.

Clapham Trinity Hospice, Clapham Youth Services and Lambeth Women’s Aid have all worked incredibly close with Mr Mayor throughout the past nine months. The main sermon reflected this, with the message of charity as a vehicle for change passed on.

Time for a *proper* tune and an uplifting solo performance from a fine young lady within Lambeth. This was followed by a reading from @cllrstevereed. It would have been interesting if the roles had been reversed, but I don’t think the occasion suited such humour.

With work commitments back at base beckoning, I slipped out of the back door, having unfortunately missed @CllrMarkBennett‘s reading. Our friends from the Lambeth Labour cabinet were singing Jerusalem, in hopefully an attempt to reclaim the Socialist anthem back from the playing fields of the public schools.

With Mr Mayor still having three months remaining of his year of civic duty, I can’t but help think that the incumbent chain rattler has something of a hard act to follow. @mayoroflambeth has been truly unique during his year in office.

It’s not just the use of social media to help spread his message that has impressed. This has been a genuinely inclusive period of office, and one that has greatly helped to raise the profile of the many charitable and campaigning groups around Lambeth.

Many thanks Mr Mayor. Good luck in his transition back to Councillor status. Here’s hoping that the civic optimism can continue in the cut and thrust of proper local politics.

After all the talk over swimming (or lack of it) in Clap’ham, Brixton and St Reatham over the past few weeks around these parts, it all comes back to a picture painting a thousand words. I think.

I greatly appreciated getting the go ahead by the lovely GLL manager at SW4 to carry out a ghost photo shoot at the closed Clap’ham pool. With the bulldozers moving in next month, this would be my final time at Clap’ham Manor.

It didn’t feel emotional, just strangely surreal. With the water still in the pool (waiting for Thames Water to assist with the drainage,) and with the two charming recpetionists still at their stations (telling customers that Clap’ham is closed,) – not much had changed.

I spent an enjoyable half hour with one of the lifeguards, lamenting happier times down at Clap’ham, and looking ahead to an uncertain future. New postings within the GLL family of pools are currently being waited upon by the staff. Pity the poor sods that get Brixton.

The photographs themselves were another opportunity to try out the still undecided upon Nikon D3000. I felt confident during the shoot and in control of what I was capturing. Back at base and it was a different story. The images below have been Photoshopped to the extreme, leaving a great sense of let down.

Which rather sums up Lambeth Labour’s pledge to Keep Clap’ham Swimming.

I rather enjoyed interviewing Councillor Nigel Haselden, Deputy Cabinet Member for Sustainability at Lambeth Council. We clashed on a number of points during our conversation, but I found the good Councillor to be charming company, and very transparent in trying to make some sort of sense out of Lambeth Labour’s current confused leisure policy.

We disagreed over the interpretation, and implication, of Lambeth Council being forced to shut Streatham Leisure Centre, and then being dictated to by private developer Cathedral Group as to when to shut Clap’ham Leisure Centre.

I simply failed to see the “success story” that Councillor Haselden was trying to spin out of the current closure of Brixton Rec, less than three years after the £2m plus refurbishment.

And so with Tesco in control of leisure in Streatham, and Cathedral Group calling the shots in Clap’ham, I was keen to find out what the pay off is for the private company in SW4.

I asked Councillor Haselden what the benefit is for Cathedral Group in the whole Future Clap’ham project. The answer of: “When they sell their posh flats on top of the High Street” tells you all you need know about the priorities of Lambeth Labour – selling off valued council land to the high end of the private sector.

We also touched on the Keep Clap’ham Swimming election manifesto that returned three Labour councillors in the Clap’ham Town ward back in 2006. Councillor Haselden confirmed that this is an election pledge that Lambeth Labour plans to stick with at the next set of local elections in May of this year. Ultimately it will be the fine people of Lambeth who will pass judgement on this promise.

The good Councillor expressed that he was “alarmed by my conclusion” that Lambeth Labour has lost control of leisure in the borough. I stand by this assertion. The “slight hiccup” of only having two hours in the morning when a pool is open in Lambeth would seem to favour my observations.

But yes – it was very decent of Councillor Haselden to argue his cause, and I am more than happy to provide a platform on m’blog for an elected official to explain the current situation. Plus also a big heads up for the ever-wonderful @mayoroflambeth for pulling the strings behind the scenes, and setting up the interview.

David’s experience of the mismanagement of leisure in the Rotten Borough mirrors the experience of most users that I have spoken with since the Lambeth leisure meltdown. I felt the comment needed more of a public platform, and so I have published it in full as a separate post.

“Leisure will be a major issue at the 2010 local elections,” as the good Councillor Haselden told me this morning.

Too bloody right.

“So angry and frustrated! I’m Andrew’s swimming housemate who after 14 years of pleasure and misery using Lambeth pools, has finally given up. It’s too early to say how successful the membership move to Nuffield and the Queen Mother will be, but my first visit was a success with reasonable room in the pool and organised system and friendly staff (not that the staff at Clapham and Brixton were not friendly,) and great promise as well as hot water and lots of it in the showers and keys in the lockers.

I never really went back to Brixton much after the last upgrade and changing room debacle, preferring to stay at the decaying Clapham. It is so galling that everything closes at the same time, and at a time that swimming is supposedly being encouraged.

I knew that the 8 weeks upgrade (yeah right that will really happen on time) followed by severe overcrowding would be a miserable and stressful experience for me instead of relaxing and health promoting. I am so glad I am not putting myself through it.

Surely closing all the pools and sports centres with the resulting lack of provision and overcrowding is also a stupid idea at the beginning of the year when many people take on new membership. Trying to to get a regular swim in Lambeth at a regular time has for many years been made as difficult as possible. Women only swims and private lessons in peak times amongst other things have left pathetic lanes which are too narrow to pass in.

I’ve given up on the feedback sessions and customer suggestion forms which were ignored. I was ashamed I didn’t go to the last Clapham meeting to tell the council organisers what I thought of their organisation, but it just didn’t seem worth my while to waste more of my time. All I can say is I’m glad I finally jumped ship, come on in the waters fine. Good luck to you onion blog and my fellow Lambeth swimmers.”

Many thanks to David for the comment.

Farewell Clap’ham Manor – you’ll be sadly missed. Thanks for the memories…

• The occasion when I left my bicycle unlocked outside SW4. It may have been 7am midwinter, but it still didn’t stop a lovely staff member from tracking me down in the pool to alert me. I was all set for a drip-dry excursion out into the South London cold. No worries – the lovely staff member had already wheeled the Moulton into reception.

• The ease of access for the early morning swims. The process started off with the handing over of my Swim London membership card and a receipt being handed out. This soon became a quick flash of the card, and then a “good morning, no ID required,” and then finally an eyebrow raise at the lovely receptionist as I wondered in each morning. These things matter. Arriving adrenalin fuelled and anticipating a swim is no fun at Brixton. You spend half your morning stuck in a queue.

• The Clap’ham Whistler is as engaging as he is irritating. A different tune for every day, all of them sounding bonkers. It’s quite funny to observe a middle-aged man whistle as he strips down to his birthday suit. The joke wears slightly thin when the whistling continues in the showers. It’s bloody annoying when you can still hear it underwater as you put the lengths in. Still, it sure beats the Radio Nonsense breakfast show twaddle that most leisure centres insist on pumping out early morning.

• The mid-morning aqua-aerobics club had an audible level all of their own. They were the aquatic version of Les Dawson’s Rolly Polly dance troupe. The water level rose a couple of inches as the big-boned ladies of SW4 entered the waters of Clap’ham. I never knew that mid 90′s techno with a Motown twist was a crowd favourite of the Darby and Joan aqua-aerobic crowd. I soon learnt more about the science of underwater sound travel. Swimming a length submerged blocked out the bloody racket.

• Swimming may be off the 2012 agenda in SW4, but I have high hopes of maintaining the Clap’ham Shower Dash. Three working showers in the Gents, operating as a living re-enactment of the Two Ronnies social class sketch. There’s the high power, the medium power and the drizzle. I knew my place. All was well if you were alone in the Gents. Add in extra male company and the the starting pistol for the Clap’ham Shower Dash is fired as you scramble for the high power shower.

• Never mind the length, feel the thickness? Nah. There was something unique and liberating about the lovely 33-yard stretch of a Clap’ham length. The standard 25m of the modern day pool is barely a kick off the side of the pool before you need to touch down again. 50m can be testing. 33 yards seemed to fit in with the classic, solid design of Clap’ham Manor.

• And so how I shall miss the old girl. The pool wasn’t perfect, but it was functioning. All I ask of an early morning recreational workout is somewhere to swim, and somewhere to shower. Clap’ham offered both of these, and much more as well. I wouldn’t have had my guttering unblocked (steady) if it hadn’t been for a chance encounter (and conversation) with old Bill in the showers. No money changed hands, and old Bill extended out his huge ladder to help ease my blocked up woes.

Farewell Clap’ham Manor Street, and many, many thanks to the community of early morning swimmers that have made the start to my day so memorable over the years.

Now then. Brixton. Brrrrr.

I have always found Clap’ham Common to have a sense of wonder and magic about it. The vast, open space in South London can’t compete with the intricate beauty of Brockwell Park; but then as the name suggests, Brockwell is a purpose built park, the Common is is a plain old patch of land.

Clap’ham Common has always held most intrigue during the balmy midsummer months. An evening stroll through SW4, just as the sun is setting, is truly one of the wonders of South London. It is here where the locals come out to play, drink and do all the other things that Clap’ham Common is notorious for.

I’ve never really thought of Clap’ham Common holding any wonder during the winter months. That was until I noticed at the weekend that the boating pond was frozen over. Wow! Not just a slight covering of ice in the centre, but a thick slab of white, from one end to the other.

I was running around the Common at the time, and so didn’t have my camera to capture the moment. Work conspired against me on Monday to make a return visit, and then by Tuesday, I presumed the moment had been lost.

How wrong I was. Thank heavens for taking the time to pack my SLR whilst out on a Brixton / Clap’ham / Stockwell run of errands over Tuesday lunchtime. I arrived along the South Side of the Common, with snow still stretching along to Long Road, and a substantial layer of ice covering the boating pond.

Time to start shooting.

There wasn’t much other activity taking place. That’s part of the magic of Clap’ham Common – an area so vast that you can always guarantee to find your own personal space. A couple were canoodling on a nearby bench; a BMX kid pondered an icy ride across the pond. I hovered with my SLR, waiting to catch that glorious moment when the ice would finally give way.

Common sense saw the better of the BMX ice Common rider. I shot a few more frames, and then took in the wonder of a frozen SW4 pond, something that I haven’t witnessed in fifteen years of living in the area.

Simply magical.

Ouch.

You can pay your £50 per month to Fitness First and guarantee leisure facilities, or wait for Labour led Lambeth Council to try and resolve the privatisation back door leisure policy that has led to all three centres in the Rotten Borough being closed next month.

The quarterly meeting of Clap’ham users with Greenwich Leisure Limited management and Lambeth Council officials, commenced with the confirmation that Clap’ham will be closing on 15th January.

The decision to padlock up the SW4 pool wasn’t taken by Lambeth Council; it wasn’t even taken by GLL. Private capital group Cathedral gave the Council just two weeks notice to clear the site.

It’s a classic political case of you scratch my back, I’ll scratch yours. In return for building a reduced sized pool, Cathedral gets to build private property to sell on for profit. It also gets to control the time scale leading to the closure at Clap’ham.

The unfortunately named Future Clap’ham is already running two years behind schedule. Cathedral stalled on the project, leading locals to dub the failed project Past Clap’ham. If you accept that a new pool is needed (which is not a consensus amongst users,) then you also accept the two-year timetable of closure.

What you can’t accept however is how a local authority has lost complete control of the management of its own leisure facilities. Pimping out pools is a policy we expect from the Tories. For a Labour led Council to be cashing in on leisure, you can draw your own conclusions about the priorities of Labour in Lambeth.

The Invisible Hand of the free market hasn’t been kind to Lambeth Council. It’s not exactly been welcoming to the users either, delivering a punch in the face as the padlocks go up around the leisure centres in Lambeth.

Lambeth Council should have managed the closure of Clap’ham. With Streatham already closed (“waiting on further investment…“) and Brixton undergoing further refurbishment less than three years since £3m was ‘invested,’ Clap’ham should have remained open until a long term strategy at the other two centres was established.

Instead we have the mad scramble of Cathedral pulling down the shutters at Clap’ham, and Lambeth Council looking incredibly stupid in the run up to 2012. Who is actually in control of running leisure in the Rotten Borough? The elected council or big business? It’s certainly not the users.

After the headline news of the closure at the forum, angry users looked around the room to try and find some answers and accountability. Lambeth Council sent along a poor payroll leisure flunkey, who although seemed genuinely concerned, was not an electable official who is responsible for the mismanagement of leisure.

Yer poor man took a right kicking, and looked around the room as well for support from any local councillors. Despite fighting (and winning) the last local election on the platform of Keep Clap’ham Swimming (ha!) not one local Labour councillor felt the need to turn up and explain the political decisions taken that have led to the closure of Clap’ham.

It’ not just about the users either. Although not wanting to go into exact details, GLL management confirmed that a series of “staff consultations” were currently in place. This is boardroom talk for redundancies.

Further questions were asked about the guarantee of the new Clap’ham pool actually opening. Given the shoddy (and delayed) re-opening of the Rec since the last refurbishment, Labour has a track record of failing to complete leisure projects on time.

No guarantees were given, but then you wouldn’t expect any firm guarantees from civil servants on the Council payroll, in the absence of any accountable local politicians.

With little else to say about the failure at Clap’ham, attention turned to Streatham and Brixton. A report has been sent to the Council concerning the feasibility of further investment at Streatham. It wasn’t clear if that further investment was money put in from the Council, or Labour’s usual backdoor trick of waiting for the private sector to foot the bill.

Brixton remains our only hope – ha! No plans or predictions have been made as to the probable increase in users whilst Clap’ham and Streatham remain shut. Given that you can only swim at Brixton between the hours of 7am – 9am, this seems incredibly short sighted, not to mention rather congested.

The winner out of this complete failure to invest in leisure within the Rotten Borough is the private sector. Yer man from Fitness First dishing out the flyers wasn’t short on interested users. Labour led Lambeth Council has achieved its desired aim of letting leisure go the way of the private sector.

What’s up for grabs next?

If you’re (i) not from my little patch of South London, and / or (ii) not interested in swimming – apologies. It’s not everyday that your poxy excuse for a local council manages to close all three pools in the area, is it?

Is it?

Cripes.

The headline news, straight outta the mean streets of Lambeth today is:

Clap’ham Pool is closing on 15th January.

It’s nothing that we didn’t already know. The harsh reality of the confirmation date brings it closer to home how Labour run Lambeth Council has completely failed the electorate when it comes to leisure provision.

What hurts harder is that the South London swimming schmozzle is of a direct result of a Labour administration getting into bed with big business, and ending up being right, royally shagged up the a***.

As a painful re-cap:

St Reatham is closed because the building is falling down. Lambeth Council won’t pump any money into the pool because of the grand plans for the failed St Reatham hub. After pimping out the project to Tesco, the supermarket is now stalling

Four years behind schedule, and the poor people of SW16 are left not only without anywhere to swim, but also an ice rink that is officially held together by masking tape and no sign of a fancy new supermarket. Which is perhaps some reason to cheer.

Brixton is closing next month, despite the candyfloss claims that Lambeth Labour pin up boy @cllrstevereed (seriously) has been trying to spin out of the sorry situation. The £2m refurbishment of two years ago is money spunked up against the changing room walls. The builders are moving in and the swimmers are moving out.

There is the outside chance of a swim in SW9, but only between the hours of 7am – 9am, and then you have to suffer the indignity of putting on your Speedos upstairs in the gym, being frog marched down two flights of stairs in full public view, before you even reach the pool. The drip drop of the return journey doesn’t even bare thinking about.

And then we come to Clap’ham.

Cripes, Clap’ham.

Clap’ham isn’t falling down, but it is being bulldozed down. The beautiful 33m pool is being replaced by some hideous glass fronted 25m pool. November 2011 is the expected completion date for Future Clap’ham, a projec that has a shifting timeline that would confuse even space / time continuum Star Trek fans.

Keep Clap’ham Swimming was the election manifesto that won Labour the Clap’ham Town ward four years ago. The fear now is that the total incompetence and lack of accountability of Lambeth Labour will lead to Clap’ham not re-opening at all.

In fairness, Greenwich Leisure Limited, the pimped out leisure partner for the Rotten Borough, is attempting to soften the blow. The sweetener of a free month of membership in January has been offered to Swim London cardholders. The only problem here of course is that you need to find a pool that is actually open to swim in.

Didn’t quite think that one through eh fellas?

And what of the poor GLL shop floor staff? The receptionists at Clap’ham are patient (often a little too patient) and genuinely nice people. Much like the above chicken and egg free swimming situation, where exactly are they going to work, now all three pools are shut?

I did feel sorry for the rather nice GLL manager at Clap’ham as he made the effort to track me down after my swim on Tuesday afternoon.

“Are you OK with the new arrangements?” he asked.

“Not really,” I offered, aware that he is probably as p***ed off as I am in the way that Lambeth Council has washed it’s hands over the pimping out of leisure in the Rotten Borough.

The Clap’ham Customer Forum on 11th January should be a lively affair.

I walked past the GLL advertising board, boasting of free swimming for the under 16′s and over 65′s in the Rotten Borough. Even this irresistible advertising claim is now open to question. There’s no such thing as a free swim – not if you can’t find a pool to actually swim in.

And so that’s the state of Sport For All in the Rotten Borough of Lambeth. It’s all a load of bollocks, and bollocks to them all.

The failure of Councillor Lib Peck in her previous cabinet role of Member for Culture and Communities led to her landing the plum portfolio of Housing and Regeneration. The good councillor told Brixton Rec users in March 2007 that:

“Brixton WILL re-open in three months.”

Three months later and The Rec remained closed. A complete lack of user consultation led to a refurbishment that is so shoddy, the Rec is closing after less than three years and a £2m investment.

Fast forward to 2010, and in three months time, the Lambeth electorate will once again be deciding which politicians can be trusted to re-open the Rec. And Keep Clap’ham Swimming. Oh, and how about the Streatham Hub situation?

My leisure, other people’s pleasure…

Ha, ha, ha.

Um, hang on… Not quite.

An eventful Monday afternoon swim, once I had actually found a pool in Lambeth that remains open. With St Reatham long since lost to political apathy from @lambeth_council, and Brixton about to implement a bonkers swimming timetable to cover up for the cock up of a £2m ‘refit’ (yeah, right…) Clap’ham was on my SW4 radar.

Ah, but as regular readers will no doubt be aware, the Rotten Borough is about to close Clap’ham as well. Keep Clap’ham Swimming, was the manifesto slogan that Lambeth Labour relied upon to win the Clap’ham Town ward from the LibDems four years ago. Careful for what you wish for, and all that.

But it’s not all bad news. A new leisure centre is being built in Clap’ham (although all three claims in this joke of a splash page are chronically economical with the truth.)

It’s about two years behind time, and the budget has more holes that a Lambeth Labour election manifesto. But yeah, the old building along Clap’ham Manor Street should soon be reduced to rubble.

Pity then the poor fellow swimmer, queuing up in the under-staffed Clap’ham reception on Monday afternoon. It’s like the last days of the Roman Empire down in SW4, without the rampant sex and flowing red wine. The poor GLL staff are being shunted north and south within the Rotten Borough, trying to find a facility that actually still needs staffing.

“I’d like to renew my swimming membership,” came the request from the customer. New Year resolutions and all that – now should be the boom period for GLL. It’s this time of the year when the cosy relationship of pimping out leisure from Lambeth Council works in GLL’s favour.

“Oh, you don’t want to do that!” came the reply from the receptionist.”

“Really? REALLY?”

It seems that GLL staff are being advised not to issue new memberships. The pool is closing, and the poor customers will soon have nowhere to swim. Not wanting to have to issue costly refunds during the refit, Sport For All is a mantra that you won’t be hearing within the Rotten Borough in the run up to 2012.

Clarification eventually came, with the receptionist muttering some vague taddle about “we’re expecting to close sometime in the spring.”

We’ve heard all of this before of course – 2009, 2008 – same as it ever was.

So whilst Lambeth Council continues to find a ‘preferred business partner’ to help make up the shortfall in the leisure budget, swimmers are being turned away as the spring months approach.

Ah, beware the ides of March, and all that.

Election time looms in the Rotten Borough.