onionbagblog

And so what has changed in the re-submitted planning application [PDF] by the University of Essex to build a multi-story car park, that has led the apolitical planning officers of Colchester Borough Council to recommend that the controversial scheme gets the go ahead when the Planning Committee next meets on 24th May?

Well…

The number of parking spaces has been reduced.

By two.

Yep – from 779 in the original application that was pulled from the agenda last month at the last moment, to 777.

On yer bike, etc.

Oh ye cycling sustainability cynic. There’s actually a little more meat in the re-submitted application that has given the Boundary Road multi-deck carbuncle the green light. Dig a little deeper, scratch a little more in a touchy feely way, and you can see how planning matters are all a matter of compromise.

Well, almost nearly all…

There’s the small matter of £250k heading the way of Wivenhoe, via University Section 106 funding from the Knowledge Gateway. The locals will get a much needed cycle path between the town’s Fire Station and the University, under the proviso that the car park gets the Planning Committee’s seal of approval.

A positive move, for sure, but one wonders what is the need for a cycle path, now that the University is making it oh so very easy to park your car on campus?

Cllr Julie Young of St Andrew’s ward helped to broker the deal, and is keen to take the credit for the back scratching compromise:

“This is excellent for Wivenhoe, the cycle link has been wanted for so long, hopefully consent will be given for the car park and the money will be released, this is something I brokered between planning and the University.”

Sure, cycle paths need to be paid for, and when you are a local authority that is facing up to implementing cuts from the top down, sadly cycling is very low down on the agenda. But building a car park as the means to an end to providing cycling provision is like saying vote LibDem so that you don’t get the Tory bogeyman.

Oh, hang on…

It doesn’t tackle the core of the problem, namely the increasing number of cars on the road around the campus, something that the University is doing little to address. This is a view that is shared by Wivenhoe Town Council.

In a scathing submission to the apolitical planning officers, WTC argued:

“It will affect an overload on traffic routes, produce congestion on roads and have the effect of a reduction in the University’s support of the use of buses, which in term may cause a very good public transport system to be reduced, or even lost.

The proposal encourages car use. The University should instead be promoting cycling, as per their 1995 strategy in which their future plans were to reduce dependency on car usage by promoting cycling and installing a railway halt.

The proposal does not explain how the building of the car park will enhance sustainable transport.”

And so that will be a NO from WTC, then.

Objections have also been received from Colchester Cycling Campaign, C-Bus and the Wivenhoe Society – y’know, the kind of groups that you would want to have on board if you were trying to promote bicycling within the borough.

The esteemed members of the CBC Planning Committee will be meeting on 24th June, 6pm at the Town Hall to make a decision on the application. Bicycle lock up provision is available along the High Street.

Disclaimer: I am rather keen on bicycling.

You don’t say.

Chapeau!

#ridecolchester, blah blah blah, but probably not around Boundary Road, once this behemoth of a carbuncle in praise of the car industry is built.

Oh – a bit of balance: the University is staging a Green Fair on campus on Thursday. Car parking might be a bit of an issue, Comrades.

Almost time for my personal highlight in the Wivenhoe social calendar – almost time for Wivenhoe Open Gardens 2012.

Hurrah!

The weekend of 19th and 20th May is when Wivenhoe resembles a cross town of fauna freaks progressing from one end of the hyperlocal patch to the other; programmes are clasped, tips are swapped, green fingered jealousy is experienced by *some* who have a hit and miss approach to producing a garden of delights.

But it’s all very, very luuurvely.

Last year witnessed many folk from outside of Wivenhoe traveling to the town, specifically to experience the joy of Open Gardens. It is a wonderful showcase for the town, highlighting not only the private that becomes public, but also the sense of sharing and community.

Life-changing relocations to Wivenhoe have been decided upon the strength of the Open Garden experience. Oh yes…

The 2012 programme is now on sale, declaring in the introduction:

“We are resilient people, we denizens of Wivenhoe.”

Too true, Comrade.

The estuary wilds weather of late might have been a little too wet even for a wet kipper in a competition to demonstrate moistness ahead of being slapped around the face of a maiden who is wetting herself in all of the excitement.

Yep – *that wet* folks.

This time last year and we were officially in a heat wave. The gamble to run with Open Garden earlier in the season paid off with great rewards. Flowers were entering the mid-summer maturing period; it was T-shirt and shades on the lawns around Wivenhoe.

Wellies and rain macs might be the wardrobe of choice for 2012.

But for all this drought inducing weather, there will probably still be something quite special to see. Mother Nature is a little like that, throwing up the most beastly conditions, but still giving the green light for all the green goodness in which to rise above.

Gardening sorta brings out the inner hippy in all of us.

Thirty private gardens throughout the town are very kindly being opened up by their owners to share over the course of the weekend. An encouraging twelve of these are new to the Open Gardens schedule.

So where to start?

You need a plan…

The ACE Open Gardens programme details each location, as well as re-producing a map in which to help guide your way around Wivenhoe. Gardening is best experienced shared, but it is also a highly subjective enjoyment. One man’s English Rose is another’s rhubarb patch.

Don’t fancy yours much.

Personal highlights penciled in for 2012 include the chance to look around the historic gardens of Toad Hall, access to both school gardens on the Sunday and the opportunity to kindly look around the Mytrtle Tree Montessori along the High Street.

A personal gratitude of thanks is awaiting the latter, what with the owner very kindly agreeing instantly to a sheepish request to cut back ever so slightly on the impressive leylandii. Thank you very much, Madam. Hugely appreciated, and we hope that it doesn’t distract from the Open Gardens experience.

They say that you should never go back, but just try and keep us away from Clifton Terrace once again. Last year and this was an unexpected gardening find. The slopes leading down to the railway line don’t lend themselves to your typical English garden. Throw in a little Germanic ingenuity, and the Clifton Terrace masterpiece is simply stunning.

Away from the main drag of the thirty gardens and there are many fringe events taking place. A plant stall will be in place at 80 High Street, with all money raised going towards the overall charitable contribution raised by the event.

A miniature garden competition is being organsied for the kids at St Mary’s, which is also the location where the Wivenhoe accepella group In Accord will be performing at noon across both days. You can also catch them at 12 Cherry Trees on Saturday, and 9 Lammas Way on Sunday, both occasions at 2pm.

Plus look out for the work of Wivenhoe in Bloom as the cross town of fauna freaks progress from one end of the hyperlocal patch to the other. This is Open Gardens all year round, with planting put in place that will survive our estuary wilds environment. The EyeCare / Jardine / Co-op Bermuda Triangle has never looked so enchanting.

Programmes for Wivenhoe Open Gardens 2012 are priced at £4 per person, and are on sale now from the Crossways Store, Rollo Estates, Bryan’s the Newsagents and the Wivenhoe Bookshop. All money raised is split between St Mary’s and Wivenhoe Society, who then very kindly donate the money to a local cause.

The programme is also packed out with many hyperlocal sponsors, showing the all round love for Open Gardens. Here’s hoping that the Weather Gods share a similar l’amour for the weekend of welcoming outdoors.

Brollies might be a good bet.

To The Greyhound! … at the rather somber time of *ahem* slightly after midday on Saturday afternoon [just] for the morning / afternoon after the night before. No Dirty Stop Out accusations over here please – this was the very worthy cause of the Wivenhoe May Fair Fundraiser, ahead of the big day out at the KGV on 26 May.

All of those portaloos don’t pay for themselves, dontachaknow.

Dosh is needed up front, and preferably RIGHT NOW. It takes a brave man / blogger to dismiss a bucket being shaken by a lovely little ankle biter of Wivenhoe, very politely asking for something ever so slightly more generous than your loose change.

Saturday afternoon in the beer garden at The Greyhound was quite wonderful. This was the true spirit of May Fair, with the local community coming out to celebrate this rather unique and quite bonkers festival that has grown up on the KGV over the past thirty years.

The link with the past [aha!] was complete with Mr Mule very kindly giving up the increasing demands on his time to put in a solo set. With a Radio Wivenhoe breakfast show, and a Hurricane gig later in the evening, there was something of a Phil Collins [steady] about the Pop Genius, doing his Live Aid London to Philly global dash.

The late luncheon crowd was rewarded with some rare early Cleaners tunes, as well as a bit of Beatles added to the end of the set. Stirring stuff, and a definite scene setter for what was to come.

These May Fair fundraisers are something of the inverse of the Glasto village fetes that traditionally take place post the Worthy Farm festival. That nice Mr Eavis puts on a bit of a song and a dance in a marquee for the locals, as a thank you for the tolerance of the festival that has just passed.

The May Fair fundraiser had a similar community ethos, not just saying thank you for what is to come, but also encouraging the community to come out to play, and to celebrate what is to come in the town over the coming weeks.

Talent was flushed out of bedroom hibernation on Saturday afternoon, both on stage, and in the Greyhound marquee.

Blimey.

The reward for the dedication to keeping live music al fresco in Wivenhoe was a glorious sunny afternoon – which is something that we haven’t been able to say for some time. More of the same please Mr Weatherman, particularly for 26th May…

The bar bolted on to the marquee made it just too easy. Thank the chuffers that the ankle biter bucket shakers managed to offload some of the loose change, before the charming barmaids managed to pocket those excess pound coins.

The music continued with a bluesy feel for the rest of the afternoon. Jay and Fiona’s stunning duet showcased a Wivenhoe talent that could hold its own on any major festival stage. A back garden performance in The Greyhound was a rare treat into the talent that the town is able to boast.

The Pulp cover come the end of the afternoon was *shhh* a Bowie for May Fair rumour waiting NOT to happen. Oh no, not here, Sireee, thank you very much.

And so shortly after 6pm, the Wivenhoe May Fair Fundraiser packed up PA’s as advertised, and then counted the coins and pondered the huge task of what is to come as the merry month of May unfolds.

Staging the May Fair is not a part-time hobby – the planning has been quite intense ever since the PA was packed away back in 2011. Saturday [oh yes] 26th May is the date for 2012. Much bucket shaking, and indeed shakers of buckets are needed to be found ahead of this date. Volunteers would be most welcome.

Saturday afternoon saw a true community spirit in helping to support the final push that is about to take place. 2012 and the 30th anniversary of Wivenhoe May Fair should succeed in its aims, if the feel of the May Fundraiser can be replicated on the KGV.

Many thanks to The Greyhound staff for being such fine hosts.

Chin chin.

Full flick feed.

Wivenhoe: We have wisteria action. Hurrah!

Like a bedroom bound teenager waiting to burst with the first spurt of summer virility, the Wivenhoe wisteria has finally flowered. I can’t stop sniffing it, to be honest.

Mr Mule’s bonkers Beach Boy ploy on Radio Wivenhoe to bring out the sun seems to have worked. Two hours of Beach Boys being blasted out from the Business Centre with Over the River on Thursday night – a one man protest to complain about the p*** poor weather.

And then come Friday morning, and WOH! Whaddya know.

Little darling, it’s been a long cold lonely winter
Little darling, it feels like years since it’s been here.

Same again for Saturday morning as well.

It is reassuring to see that the incredibly short back and sides that I inflicted upon the wisteria over the winter months hasn’t stunted the growth. Similar severe haircuts to me as a schoolboy led to playground harassment.

Look who has the last laugh now, Comrades – the wisteria had budded beautifully, and the schoolboy has grown to become, um…

And so what does it all mean?

Well…

The outdoor office is with us once again. Probably at least until 9am on Monday morning. The bees are buzzing, no doubt keen to have a good sniff around that teenage virility. Bless this Victorian house and all that built her.

And *ahem* converted her.

Wisteria seems quite particular to this hyperlocal [OH YES] patch (although I note some Transpontine interest from m’South London Comrades.)

Don’t even mention de-budding the teenager.

To the William Loveless Hall! [where else?] …on Wednesday evening for what I was hoping would be the Over 40′s STRETCH Yourself Fitter Class. I may *or may not* have found what I was looking for. It was hard to tell to be honest.

I ended the evening by realising that I had just sat through the Wivenhoe Town Council Annual Town Meeting.

Whoops.

I lost about five pounds with all the excitement, mind.

Phew, rock ‘n roll.

A full William Loveless Hall confirmed the level of civic interest that the town has when it comes to hyperlocal council matters. A tremendous amount of credit for this must go down to Peter Hill. Back in the day and the former Mr Mayor has the rather ingenious idea of dishing out the dosh from the Mayor’s Charity Fund at an annual meeting.

The masses come out to pick up the brown envelopes stuffed full of worthy wonga, whilst at the same time, civic engagement is seen to be taking place. Or perhaps Wivenhoe folk just take an active interest anyway in hyperlocal matters?

All the same – superb turn out.

Apologies came from Cllr Julie Young and the newly elected Cllr Cyril Liddy of the Quay ward. Nice one, etc. The Comrades have been a little over-stretched of late on the #labourdoorstep. A night off is well deserved.

Mayor Robert Needham opened the meeting by stating what a privilege it has been to represent Wivenhoe over the past twelve months. All the staff of Wivenhoe Town Council were praised, and then we got onto the meaty matters of what has been achieved over the course of the past civic year.

It’s quite a list, Comrades, and is no coincidence that an incredibly strong leadership at the top table has helped to push through many of these matters.

Responsibility for the wet dock was mentioned, with WTC now looking after the moored boats, the car park, the dinghy park and the misnomer that is / isn’t the Fisherman’s Store.

It’s a McDonalds Drive By waiting to happen, I tell you.

Huge credit was given to the four Borough councillors from the two wards, which have put aside party differences to sign the Working for Wivenhoe agreement. This essentially allows Section 106 wonga to filter down to whatever hyperlocal project needs the funding, irrespective of the Cross or Quay wards.

The dosh coming out of Cook’s is being used at the Cricket Club, the Tennis Club, the KGV pavilion, Broad Lane and Lower Lodge Farm.

Accountability was highlighted in the calling of the public meeting back in September, to see if the revolting residents of Wivenhoe wanted Jenny Moody Properties to build on the public land by Millfields School.

I think you know the answer, Comrades.

The past year has seen a new Wivenhoe Town Council website [oh yes,] the setting up of the Community Opportunities Group and the “landmark effort” of purchasing the two police houses along the High Street.

“We have a wealth of community assets – this is a very active town.”

The highlights of the Mayoral year were considered too great to offer a comprehensive report. The Quay Quilters, the Regatta, Carols on the Quay and events at the schools were all made reference to by Mayor Needham.

And then it came down to the dishing out of the dosh. An incredible £6k has been generated out of the Mayor’s Charity Fund [which isn't really a charity, Mr Taxman...] This was then channeled back into the local community, with many of the deserving hyperlocal Wivenhoe groups that achieve genuine greatness around our patch being recognised.

Smile for the camera, and job’s a good ‘un.

With the apt timing of the bells of St Mary’s being peeled, we then moved on to Jubilee Week, and… the peeling of the St Mary’s bells on the morning of the 4th June.

DING DONG, yeah, yeah…

A well thought out programme of events has been put in place by WTC. Once again, an incredible effort has been taking place behind the scenes. Volunteers, as ever, are always needed to help out in any small way.

The ACE Jubilee Jigsaw was bigged up, as well as the WTC time capsule, which was produced. You could fit a living, breathing Wivenhoe artist in there, Comrades.

The finale for the Wivenhoe Jubilee celebrations was confirmed as the lighting of the beacon on the evening of the 4th June. This has now got Official Beacon Status – or some such title – meaning that Wivenhoe will now be part of a national network of fires being lit in celebration of Brenda sitting on her throne.

The meeting then opened up to Q’s from residents. Two were submitted, the first dealing with the allotments and possibility of carving up the larger allotments to allow more sharing.

Already part of WTC policy apparently.

The second Q could fill a blog post, an entire blog and probably the modern interweb itself: The Engine Shed.

Oh Lordy.

The resolution was phrased:

“Point:

The parlous condition of the Engine Shed, which is a disgraceful eyesore in lower Wivenhoe.

Resolution:

“That the Council should use it influence to persuade Network Rail to either put the Engine Shed up for immediate sale, or to seek its de-listing and demolition forthwith.”

OUCH.

Cllr Kraft confirmed that correspondence has been entered in to with Network Rail, documenting the state of the hoardings. Apparently this is “satisfactory,” according to Network Rail. It is an ongoing dialogue…

The point was made from the floor that the demolition of the Engine Shed would lead to a sense of loss in the history of lower Wivenhoe. Obvious parallels exist here with *cough* the St John’s Ambulance Building.

Um, let’s leave it at that.

For now.

The meeting was closed, with Mr Mayor making the point that Wivenhoe Helping Hands was offered a sum from the Mayor’s Charity, but chose to politely refuse the offer.

Which sorta sums up Wivenhoe.

Our very welcome guest also agreed.

And we’re done! Must say I rather like Wivenhoe. Smashing little place

— Caroline Tilley (@CarolineTilley1) May 9, 2012

Lovely.

Spring 2012: hyperlocal history will recall it as the period where rain water replaced sun rays, the Co-op had a run on Ibuprofen (apologies) and Wivenhoe Town Council did the door-to-door delivery thing, selling window shammys.

Oh, hang on – that knock, knock, knock at the door wasn’t a WTC sales pitch, but the delivery of the latest Wivenhoe Town Council News for Spring 2012.

Hurrah!

Whaddya mean that window cleaning isn’t included in my Council Tax bill?

The proposed Jubilee Garden leads the way, with one of those architectural drawings that manages to somehow make even a rubble of land look like a stunning 21st Century structure that should be taking its place down at the South Bank.

This is Wivenhoe, dahhhhling!

And thank the chuffers for that.

The drawing of the Jubilee Garden may look a little chi chi, but the hard toil of Transition Town Wivenhoe and others will soon deliver a very practical nature garden, right in the centre of the town:

“As part of the town council’s programme for the Queen’s Jubilee, we have prepared plans for a Jubilee garden in the area of unused land behind the council offices. A substantial part of the funding for this has already been obtained from Cory Environmental Trust, and we are actively looking for more.”

Dig for Victory, Comrades. Preferably anytime from 10am – 4pm on 13th May when the lovely folk of TTW will next be volunteering to make the rubble look an architectural wet dream.

Speaking of tugging away at bell ends, what about the grand peeling of the St Mary’s bells, taking place on the morning of Monday 4th June to celebrate Brenda’s 60th year on the throne?

DING DONG, etc.

The WTC newsletter also helpfully updates with other officially endorsed items on the Jubilee agenda:

2nd June – June Market and Art on the Railings

2nd June – Diamond Jubilee Ball in the William Loveless Hall [where else?]

3rd June – Church Thanksgiving Service

4th June – Pealing of the bells and FUN Day at the KGV

FUN Days always need to be capped up, Comrades. Just so y’know what you’re letting yourself in for.

Central to Wivenhoe… is a half-decent read all about the successful purchase of the two old police houses along the High Street by WTC. It can’t be underestimated what a stroke of strategic genius this move was, linking up the run of civic owned property right in the heart of Wivenhoe. You never know when your friendly local WTC wants to build a motorway right across the town…

“The potential to provide a substantial community facility is enormous. The decision was a bold one. It was taken with confidence that townsfolk are supportive of the measure and that a once in a lifetime opportunity might be passed by.”

Fine work, fellas and fella-esses.

The Wivenhoe Co-operative Community Group gets a mention, with news of an afternoon tea event at Stuart Pawsey Court aimed at those people of any age who would like to pop in and meet the residents and others.

Which is not something that you’re likely to read on a Daily Mail front page, and which is why Wivenhoe is all the better for such hyperlocal updates from WTC.

A roll call of improvements is listed for the William Loveless Hall over the past civic year. These include new flooring in the main hall, total refurbishment of the ladies’ toilet and a VIP suite installed with a customised cocktail bar and subscription style TV screens for the more discerning of residents.

Possibly.

Wivenhoe Helping Hands continues to grow, as is documented in the WTC newsletter:

“Over 100 residents have been helped with a total of over 600 jobs since the start up nearly two years ago..”

Volunteers, as ever, are always in short supply. 0783 445 2764 should suffice.

An update on the proposed new medical centre behind the Fire Station is also published. Put simply, the wonga is sitting in a safe bank account, waiting for the negotiations with the landowner to proceed.

You can hear Bernie Boy bang on about it towards the end of this audio [recorded at around 2am in a very tired and emotional state, a situation that you should never allow yourself to fall into with a Conservative MP...]

Memorial Plaques [no connection with Conservative MP's] seem like a very dignified and affordable idea. WTC is proposing that these be made available for folk from the town, who perhaps might have passed away elsewhere, but whose memory remains in Wivenhoe.

You can take the old boy out of Wivenhoe, etc…

And finally:

There is no such thing as a Poo Fairy.

Nope – not a new hyperlocal Wivenhoe nursery rhyme that they are teaching the little ankle biters down at the Montessori, but a polite reminder to dog folk to pick up Fido’s faeces.

Hopefully it won’t be a time for skid marks when the Annual Wivenhoe Town Council Meeting takes place on 9th May, 7:30pm at the William Loveless Hall [where else?]

All welcome.

Don’t forget yer doggy bag.

Another day in the Bank Holiday weekend, another wonderful walk as part of the Sunny Colch 2012 schedule for Jane’s Walk. And whaddya know – Sunday afternoon saw a slight amble around Wivenhoe and the surrounds.

Well I never.

As has been blogged before, one of the inclusive aims of Jane’s Walk weekend is to explore your own hyperlocal environment at a pace that perhaps is a little more leisurely than the day-to-day schedule allows. You need to look around your community to better understand what the needs are.

For Wivenhoe read: wellies.

Sunday afternoon saw a friendly walk around Ferry Marsh and Wivenhoe Wood with the very decent Professor Ted Benton from the Sociology department at the University of Essex. Back in the day, and the good Prof instructed me in Modern Social Theory up on campus. Fast forward twenty years and it was all about beetles, bumble bees and great big logs in Wivenhoe Wood.

I know which form of instruction will prove to be the greater like skill.

The weekend Wivenhoe weather wasn’t exactly conducive to enticing all the buzzy buzzy little things out from wherever they rest their wings in-between being a buzzy buzzy thing.

No worries – Jane’s Walk in Sunny Colch is showing great resilience in stepping out into our hyperlocal environment, even if that hyperlocal environment is telling you that it is probably best to head back to the pub.

The Wivenhoe walkers were rewarded along Ferry Marsh with a rare fly-past from a barn owl, not once, but a circuit covering the Colne and the area around West Quay, hovering for prey and proving to be something of a hoot.

Funny.

Along came a great big blackbird and the birding version of the Battle of Britain soon broke out. Mother Nature can be a bit of a bitch sometimes.

We pressed on towards Wivenhoe Wood, still not too late in the season to see the bed of bluebells that welcome young eloping lovers who fancy a bit of naturist al fresco fun. Sadly not a lot to see here either.

Prof Ted had the eyes of an owl in being able to pick out some bees fighting back the pollen repellent conditions. A truly beautiful moth was also swooped upon, with antenna that was as delicate as my walking shoes now splattered with Wivenhoe Wood mud.

You’re not meant to walk in them, dontcha know.

To fit the Sunny Colch criteria, the party split up back down beside the muddy banks of the Colne. Britain’s Oldest Recorded is that-a-way, whereas Wivenhoe and the backroom of The Greyhound can be found back up the Trail.

Chin chin.

It’s thirsty work this Jane’s Walk way of appreciating what you have around where you live. With a couple of cracking walks still to come on Monday, fighting talk was found after a few pints.

Watch me walk in a straight line tomorrow, Comrades…