Crap Match Report

LV= County Championship Division Two, Colchester (close, day two), Essex 369: Pettini 134; Ansari 5-108, Surrey 301-7: Burns 157; Panesar 3-95, Porter 2-68, Surrey trail by 68 runs.

DSC00043

To Castle Park! …once again on Saturday morning for day 2 of the ‘rrey away against the Essex slappers.

A Sunny Colch morning meant that it was a BATTING DAY.

It was also a day for a slight digital misunderstanding. Castle Park may be a quaint riverside country circuit ground, but it ‘aint geared up for the modern interweb.

A couple of His ‘n’ Hers tickets were snaffled late online the night before. A pdf confirmation on the iPhone wasn’t to the liking of the good old Essex boy on the gate.

In the end charm was used to gain entry – his, not hers.

We took up our seats behind the stumps with the home team riding out the first innings on 342-8.

Incoming batsman… Monty Panesar.

Oh Lordy.

Yer man Monty slogged #AnsariWatch for a couple of sixes, before Mark Pettini down at the other end brought the Essex innings to a close.

The small matter of the Ashes being regained took place during the brief batting change over.

But it was back in Castle Park where the real action was about to take place: #AnsariWatch opening for the ‘rrey.

Our hero was soon back in the hutch with a score of six against his name.

Thanks for coming, etc.

The ‘rrey went in at luncheon on 66-1. ‘Gourmet Essex burgers’ and booze were on the menu in the cheap seats. Plus a WEIRD slug mating ritual conversation with Wifey to wash it all down.

Surrey fell to 112-4 at one stage during the afternoon session. But I slept through it all and so it didn’t really happen.

I was awoken by a bastard wasp that decided to take a bath in my pint of cheapo Fosters. The little bugger died in a pool of cheap booze.

But what a way to go…

It then got slightly silly with Wifey actually believing that the ‘catch a ball and blag £1,000’ promotion was taking place at a rural club cricket ground.

She would have dropped it anyway.

The rest of the afternoon was lost in a haze of BOOZE and sun stroke. But I do remember being told over the PA system that:

“Conferencing is popular at the Essex County Ground.”

Mass debate, etc.

We missed our train on the way home.

Oh dear.

C’mon the ‘rrey!

DSC00001

DSC00003

DSC00004

DSC00005

DSC00008

DSC00010

DSC00009

DSC00011

DSC00015

DSC00013

DSC00016

DSC00018

DSC00020

DSC00019

DSC00021

DSC00024

DSC00027

DSC00026

DSC00028

DSC00029

DSC00032

DSC00035

DSC00034

DSC00036

DSC00037

DSC00038

DSC00039

DSC00040

DSC00041

DSC00045

DSC00048

DSC00049

DSC00051

DSC00052

DSC00055

DSC00053

DSC00059

DSC00060

DSC00061

DSC00063

DSC00065

DSC00066

DSC00068

DSC00070

DSC00072

DSC00075

DSC00073

DSC00076

DSC00077

DSC00078

DSC00080

DSC00079

DSC00081

DSC00082

DSC00085

DSC00084

DSC00086

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *