Crap Match Report

Dulwich Hamlet 3, Harrow Borough (or was it Harlow?) 2 (or was it 3?)

To Transpontine del Curva! …on Saturday afternoon for the season opener for the Dulwich.

This has been the MOST PAINFUL pre-season in memory. Force fed a football lite diet of pretend matches via the twaddle of the World Cup, the Hamlet’s home game against Harrow has had me creaming it every morning for the past week.

And so I missed the first goal.

Whoops.

Truth be told and I was still arseing around at the lovely lido. I remember from season’s past that I never actually attended any August fixtures until the lido season was finished.

Best of both worlds though for Saturday with a quick dip, and then the short cycle across the borough border and over into Southwark.

All of this first day of the new season is quite new to me. Back in the inflated world of professional football and the term ‘Matchday Game 1’ has started to enter into the vocabulary of mainstream media land.

Back down to reality with Dulwich and it was simply the Hamlet’s first home game with plenty of man / woman hugs to greet friends old and new that have been off the radar over the summer months.

Once chap missing was Pressure Harry.

I can’t claim that I was on speaking terms with David Harris, but he has been a constant behind the goal during my two decades of watching Dulwich.

And so I missed the opening goal scored by Kershaney Samuels in the fourth minute, and I missed the laying to rest of the ashes of Pressure just before kick off.

The high drama of the final home game of last season was missing for most of this match. This was a slow-burner to start the season off.

The crowd of 607 was particularly impressive for an August Saturday in South London. This was the highest first Matchday Game 1 down at the Dulwich in over forty years.

As the songs says, ‘and The Rabble are warming up, warming up…

A second goal from Samuels certainly helped. Dulwich were cruising, so to speak.

New players, new songs as well for The Rabble. I didn’t quite catch all of the details, but I’m sure the Brixton Buzz #dhfc songbook has a sequel to be published sometime during the season.

Red cards were dished out during the first half. Not to any players, but half of the home support behind the goal.

We were given instructions to “use only for non-contentious decisions.”

Are you looking at my whippet?

RED CARD.

And so 2-0 to the Dulwich at half time. There was almost a reluctance to change ends and make the short trip down to the Car Wash End.

Summer conversations were still being caught up; there was an incredibly relaxed feeling to the occasion.

It wouldn’t last.

Welcome to the Pleasure Dome had me buzzing as it was played over the PA. I was disappointed not to have been able to pick up a copy of The Moral Victory, a new fanzine for Dulwich.

A fantastic effort though in the entire print run for the first issue selling out in the first 45 minutes.

Harrow made a game of it after the break with the score at 2-1. Laurent Hamici added a third for Dulwich and the party started. So much so that I took my eye off the ball and the Crap Match Report almost became Dulwich 3 Harlow 3.

Incorrect teams, incorrect score lines.

It wouldn’t be the first time.

A little bit of twitter confusion led to a ghost goal being scored for Harrow / Harlow. The away following wasn’t exactly vocal, leading to a casual observer missing out on the action.

3-2 was confirmed though, as was the three points for the Hamlet come the final whistle.

Moral Victories, etc, Forward the Hamlet.

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

Dulwich 3, Harrow 2

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